Anyone here able to help regarding pulling my kid out of public school, like tomorrow?

[halobeam]

I'm at my wits end with the curriculum and the state assessments. He's in 7th grade and lost any motivation or caring to do anymore. He's on total overload. I don't blame him one damn bit at this point. He NEVER quit trying until now. They have zapped any bit of his beautiful spirit and natural curiosity to learn. They have burnt him out, 2hours min. a night and 4 hours each weekend day to keep up with a C+/B. The volume of work handed out imo, is abusive at this point and I don't want him in this system any longer.

What do I do? I need to get him into a private school of some sort that doesn't give state tests and teaches a concept within a reasonable time frame. He's had two weeks to learn the constitution, all the articles, every amendment. During this same period, he's doing his first research project for English that is a real research paper, 5 sources, etc, worked cited pages, topic sentences, every detail needs to have a source # which supports the topic sentence. He needs to connect compare contrast sources, etc. Add to it, a science test which taught him in one week the respiratory and the excretory system. Add to it, reading a book for English (aside from the research project) in which five chapters are to be read this week, 40 questions, 30 vocabulary words and a group project. To boot, he's got the math state assessment test this same week all of this is to be done.

How does a child get transferred into another school, mid year? I don't have certification to home school, which is practically what I'm doing at this point after his school day anyway, but I'm not allowed to do this w/o one, iic.

I know this is the curriculum not designed by the school, and I know how everyone feels about the state tests, including admin. and teachers, parents, kids... I can't change what is, so my thinking is I need to change schools.

Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated. I don't want him to get left back because of the system.

[hedgehog]

1. I can't help, but I am curious. What state are you in, what type of district?

[halobeam]

2. I'm in NY, what do you mean what type of district?

[hedgehog]

13. My kids go to school in Fulton, which is a small city/ rural district.

We have a range of households from welfare, Spanish speaking, working poor, middle class, upper class. Some kids barely learn to read, others end up taking several AP classes. The culture at the high school is fascinating; there is a group of bright kids from every socio-economic class and there is a group that they call "preppies" who come from the wealthier homes. The kids in the first group work their asses off. The kids from the second group tend to cheat a lot but think of good grades as an entitlement.

Anyways; I have a theory that the NCLB fuss has left a lot of moderately well off people in a panic that their kid isn't going to get into a good college. My theory is that in homogeneous districts with a lot of middle class people, that panic results in extreme pressure on the kids especially in middle school. What I see in my district is that there are plenty of opportunities for kids to learn in high school, AP courses and science clubs, orchestra, art, etc. Since we have a lot of households that aren't focused on learning (unfortunately), there is less pressure for every kid to be a genius. I do see a little bit of what you are up against in the "Honors" classes; Honors English and Honors Social studies. Ironically, my kids have found that the Honors classes tend to be full of glitzy assignments that don't mean much. For example, instead of reading the Diary of Ann Frank or watching the PBS film about the The Wannsee Conference, the assignment was to write a first person account of surviving the Holocaust. Lots of busy work, little learning. Given a choice, my kids steer clear of Honors classes so they have more time for AP classes.

[halobeam]

38. I'm finding that many people are comparing the work load my

child has, with honors classes. He's not in honors. This is what is driving me crazy (among other things); it shouldn't be this way in the school district! Two teachers I've spoken to today/tonight have told me that the level of Soc.Studies he's learning is HS level. I even explained to one person, that my 11th grade son covered a similar issue in government on a test and his test was easier than my 7th graders! This is outrageous.

I'll kick this back up in a couple of days when I have some answers. Right now, I've tried to respond to everyone kind enough to spend their time helping me deal with this, and I'm past exhausted.

Thanks for giving me your time tonight, I don't know what I'd do w/o this community here; full of many thoughtful people.

Good night.:)

[sunnystarr]

14. My ex daughter in law pulled my granddaughter out of school

and home schooled her in mid year a few years ago. She lives in upstate NY. She has an 8th grade education and my granddaughter was in 7th grade at the time she was taken out of public school. NYS's only requirement is that you can fill in the paperwork - evidently that qualifies you to teach at home. Needless to say I wasn't happy about it. My granddaughter is now 16 and she was moved to another county and no new homeschooling was approved. Her dad contacted Social Services for educational neglect but the maternal grandmother told SS that her daughter and granddaughter moved out and nothing more was done. This child hasn't had any education since she was pulled out of 7th grade and trust me no authority gives a damn. There isn't any oversight. In TN you need a HS diploma up to homeschool through 8th grade and a 4 year degree to teach HS. I couldn't believe TN required more than NYS.

While you of course want an education for your son, you can pull him out to homeschool him and make sure that he does get an education at home. If you're serious there are many homeschooling networks comprised of parents who really do provide an education and who help and guide each other.

I help raise my grandsons, one of whom is in 7th grade in Nashville. It's really tough here too and takes all my energy to help him to meet these requirements. The only other way out of jumping through these hoops is if your son is ADD, ADHD, has dyslexia or some other learning disability. You can then insist on modifying homework as seems fit.

[halobeam]

37. When they didn't accept new homeschooling,

was she not allowed to re-enter a public school system?

It sounds like you have had some hard times dealing with this. I'm so sorry. There are so many ways for every system to go wrong. Public, private, home-schooling. There's a lot to consider, and one has to know oneself in order to make the right decision. I'm hoping I know myself and my son well enough to do this right. I certainly won't be accused of not exhausting every avenue and every method of research I can get my hands on.

I give you a lot of credit, giving your grandsons the support they need. They are so lucky to have you!

[tigereye]

3. anyway to get some of the workload reduced by the school/teachers

until you can make some changes? Is he running out of energy due to too much work?

It's so hard how much work they have to do, when they need time for other stuff and fun as well. :(


This is why I send my kid to a small private progressive school where they have time to pay attention to the needs of each kid and don't overload em.

[halobeam]

7. I'd love to do that, but I thought their response would be

they can't change the curriculum for any particular student. How could I persuade them to do this?

There is no time for anything else in his life. He has three tests this week that he is going to fail because why? Too much info to MEMORIZE in too short a time-frame, it isn't learning they are doing, it's memorization! He's literally burnt out. He isn't absorbing anymore right now, and yes, the energy he ran out of is most certainly due to too much work. His father turned 50 yesterday, we had a party, and so, he is shoving way too much info in, that he shut down today, and said, "I can't remember anymore, Mom, I don't care if I fail now." That kicked me in the gut. I feel so sorry for him, it isn't right.

I want to send him to a small priv. prog. school.. how do I find one that's reputable, affordable (reasonably) and will take a student, mid year? Is this impossible?

Thank you so much for taking the time. I'm in tears.

[tigereye]

11. go online or ask friends where you live

if you live near a city there might be a kids/parenting mag or website that offers some info about private schools...

our school here in PA takes kids pretty much anytime....

However, you might want to talk to the school admin and see if there is something that can be done to take the pressure off... I'm sure they don't want kids to get so burnt out that they stop caring about school... maybe some time spent with the school counselor or guidance counselor to come up with some solutions - is he in honors classes, or is this just the typical curriculum?

[halobeam]

36. I'm going to be talking to the school admin. for sure.

First I think I need to read up on some things. I don't like to go unprepared to meetings.

To answer your question, he's in the typical curriculum. I wish the school had a tracking system like they used to have. It would be so much better for many children I would think. Why the hell did they withdraw this, all for a kids self-esteem? I don't think what is happening to my child (I'm sure, as well as other children) is helping their self-esteem much. Huge mistake they made, imo.

:pals: thanks

[Breeze54]

4. Sounds like boat load of homework.

Have you tried talking to the teachers about the heavy work load?

Are other parents complaining too? Can you get them organized and then go as a group to complain?

Has your son been placed in a class that is more than he can handle? Can you have him moved to a different level?

I feel your pain. If I remember correctly, my son's 7th grade had tons of work too.

I don't know about transferring him, on such short notice, so close to the end of the year.

Wouldn't that freak him out emotionally as well, especially at that age?

Readjusting to a new school and all the new kids?

Can you get him any help after school? A tutor? A college kid?

Does the school have a Homework Help Center? Mine did and it saved us!!

Good Luck!

[halobeam]

9. Thank you, I haven't talked to the school, because I believe

their not going to give him any spec. treatment (that is how they have seen issues like this before).. never assess a student individually. That's another issue I have with them. I can call a few parents I know, I did call two others, one has a kids that's doing "alright" and the other just moved here, her son was an A student, now failing English (same teacher my son has..). I could make more calls, but I think he'll have failed too many tests by then, to pass the year.

I would've thought he'd freak too, but he actually is the one that asked to leave the school. He has fit in fine in school, has friends, but can't take this overload of work.

I have gotten him a tutor, in Math, plus he's in supportive math, and with three people teaching him math, he became more confused. I kept asking they communicate and coordinate what they are doing with him, esp. before exams, but they didn't.

The school's policy is extra-help ONLY if there is a specific question. How does he know what to ask if is lost?

Thanks for some good suggestions.

[Breeze54]

12. I was just thinking that you might consider

inviting some of the parents over or throw a small party for your son
and his friends but also invite the parents and bring up the topic.

Maybe you should just have a talk with the principal?

Did the teacher get behind in the required teaching schedule
and is now 'pouring it on' to catch up? That can happen.
Is there anyway they can spread out or extend when all these
reports and projects are due?

It sounds like 'the team' for the 'supported' math isn't listening.

You should request a meeting with the team!

Does your son have an IEP?
If so, contact his counselor and lay it on them!

[halobeam]

17. I'd love to throw a party and invite them,

but most of them aren't available to get on the phone quite frankly. This area is chock-full of over achievers and parent's who don't have the time of day to take their kids anywhere, let alone get on the phone with a parent.

I know, why am I here? LOL.. I've lived here my whole life and watched this change slowly to get to this point.

Back to the point, I know the principal well, she's great when you need something done, but when it comes to "changing the usual for anyone" she sees everyone as one, not as an individual. This is not good.

How do I find out if a teacher signed on to the required teaching schedule? What IS the "required teaching schedule? Is that the state curriculum? I didn't know they could or could not sign onto something as indiv. teachers, I thought the school did these things as a whole. NO?

[Breeze54]

19. Did I say signed on? Maybe it was a typo but

I think most schools have a time frame for when things are supposed to be taught by.
A date certain. Maybe my son's teachers were just BSing me! :P But I think there are
benchmarks they're supposed to meet by a certain date. I mean, there are only so many
days in the school year, right? (185?) What about the PTA contact or the School Board?
Don't they decide what,where and when? Has your son been tested to see if he is eligible
for extra help? Does he have an IEP? An Individual Educational Plan? If so, then they
should make adjustments for him and you should be a team member in making that decision!

http://schools.nyc.gov/NR/rdonlyres/78DA2E99-E3EA-40CD-B209-4E07A0CB5BA8/13284/EnglishParentBillofRights_rev10Aug06.pdf">The NYC Bill of Parent Rights and Responsibilities 2006 (Updated 01/09/07)

New York State Education http://www.emsc.nysed.gov/

Resources:

* Citizens
* Individuals with Disabilities
* Licensed Professionals
* Parents
* School Administrators
* Students
* Teachers

[halobeam]

20. Is there a particular test to see if he's eligibile for extra help?

No, he doesn't have an IEP. Is that part of the particular test you are talking about? I'm def. going to check out your link. Thank you. I'm also going to go to his elem. school principal and ask her to direct me to particular people, we have formed a great relationship over the years (I have an 11th grader also).

[Breeze54]

27. Yes.... You can request that he be evaluated.

A Guide to the Individualized Education Program

http://www.ed.gov/parents/needs/speced/iepguide/index.html

Step 1. Child is identified as possibly needing special education and related services.

"Child Find." --> Targets younger kids but that website will give you some good info!

The state must identify, locate, and evaluate all children with disabilities in the state who need
special education and related services. To do so, states conduct "Child Find" activities. A child
may be identified by "Child Find," and parents may be asked if the "Child Find" system can evaluate
their child. Parents can also call the "Child Find" system and ask that their child be evaluated.

Or —

Referral or request for evaluation. A school professional may ask that a child be evaluated to see if
he or she has a disability. Parents may also contact the child's teacher or other school professional
to ask that their child be evaluated. This request may be verbal or in writing. Parental consent is
needed before the child may be evaluated. Evaluation needs to be completed within a reasonable time
after the parent gives consent.

Step. 2

More.....

-------------

http://books.google.com/books?id=gHcJcU-NX-wC&pg=PA35&lpg=PA35&dq=iep+testing+new+york&source=web&ots=7Fq_JvB0_s&sig=XcL_WI7x98Deluv_qqsgiHTJwyY&hl=en">A Parent's Guide to Special Education in New York City and the Metropolitan

Barnes&Noble.com - $19.95

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You'd probably get better info. from the school counselor. I'd start there.
My son had an IEP for Math and some English. He had some LD's. The IEP helped a lot!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

http://school.familyeducation.com/learning-disabilities/high-school/37682.html?detoured=1">Learning Disabilities and the High-School Years

"When a student reaches the high school level with an undiagnosed learning disability, their self esteem is very low," says Dr. Matthew Brewer, pediatrician. "The student is usually failing classes, does not want to cooperate, and creates a challenging situation for everyone involved." Learning disabilities and the frustrations that accompany them are a major reason that kids drop out of high school. Solid support from parents and professionals is vital to a student reaching his or her full potential. If your child displays any of the following signs repeatedly speak with a school professional at once.

* Problems adjusting to new settings
* Poor memory skills
* Problems with open-ended questions on tests
* Avoids reading and writing assignments
* Difficulty summarizing
* Spelling problems, such as spelling the same word differently in a single composition
* Misreads information Poor grasp of abstract concepts
* Either pays too little or too much attention to details
* Works slowly

Have your school do a full evaluation of your child. Once the problems are identified
and understood, then accomadations can be put in place to help your child learn.

More on: Identifying Learning Disabilities

[halobeam]

31. Wow! This is a whole host of info...

I appreciate every bit of help you are offering. I just finished a long call with a teacher from a neighboring district and she helped me so much, too. I said something during the course of our conversation that prompted her to ask me if he was tested for dyslexia. When she asked me questions about his writing (note-taking, copying) or his reading (adding words, sometimes even omitting them), and a bunch of other questions, it seems there could be a need to test him for this. First I'm going to check some things out while he reads to me; I'll dictate to him, or have him write something and then by contrast type it, and see if his comprehension level is higher for one over the other, etc. If it seems his focus on the skill of writing the words, putting spaces in between words in the sentence, etc, and reading all add up to what she describes as symptoms, I'll be requesting if not demanding him be tested for this. Too many things added up in the conversation for me not to take the time with him and check this out completely. I can't help but wonder how a child could go through to seventh grade without a teacher seeing something?

I wonder if IEP can test for a specific thing or it is for everything at once? Hope that makes sense, I'm getting a bit tired now.

Bookmarking this page for all the wonderful help from everybody.

Thanks Breeze!

[Breeze54]

34. You're welcome...

:hug:

Here's a checklist but don't freak out!

You are only looking for consistency from this list.

All teens do this stuff but if they do a group of these things all the time....

Learning Disabilities: Warning Signs in Teens

http://life.familyeducation.com/teen/high-school/48439.html?detoured=1

The National Center for Learning Disabilities has developed a checklist of common warning signs.
The organization stresses that this is merely a “guidepost” for parents. Because all children exhibit
some of these behaviors throughout childhood, what you're looking for is a consistent pattern
of a group of these behaviors that indicate your teen is not progressing at an appropriate rate.

More.... http://printables.familyeducation.com/tv/printables/fe/pc/0,,33931-1665,00.pdf">Learning Difficulties Checklist

Excerpted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Parenting a Teenager © 1996 by Kate Kelly.


I wish I had known about this book 6 years ago! :rofl:

[halobeam]

35. I'm not freaked out LOL

Appreciate the warning first though.

I do see consistencies in the "Spoken/Written Language" area, and in the "Memory" area (a little less than the former category though).

Maybe I should get a copy of that book! :rofl:

[Nay]

5. My sympathies to you and your boy, Halobeam. If a private school

is within your budget, look at Montessori or Waldorf schools in your area. They teach the whole child and reject the idiocy that's now going on in public schools.

It's been 20 years since I homeschooled my son, and it was in a different state, but I homeschooled under the umbrella of a Baptist Church (even tho I'm an atheist!). The Baptists didn't know that, of course, but check out NY laws on homeschooling, hook up with the homeschoolers in your area, and ask your questions. Your son will be eternally grateful.

[halobeam]

10. I will check that out immed.

thank you so much. I don't remember feeling this upset in a very long time.

[grasswire]

6. I wish there was a happy medium.

The kids in this household (now in high school) have never been challenged. In middle school, open classrooms allowed eating, hobbies such as knitting, food throwing, talking, etc., while the teacher was trying to supervise kids out of their seats, on the floor, etc. There were very few real requirements. It isn't much better in the high school. It's a shame and a waste. I'd like to see some rules and some demands and some real teaching.

[halobeam]

21. Balance is like a curse word, isn't it?

I don't understand how they expect children to become balanced young adults, in a world without balance. It is the key to EVERYTHING that is real and good.

[coffeenap]

8. Here is link to a site for gifted support--lots of people homeschool

for that reason. Perhaps you will find some useful information about the situation in New York. If you don't find it, write to the person who runs that site--she is well connected to homeschoolers all over the US and might have the exact information you need. (It doesn't matter if giftedness is not an issue for you, the homeschool info will still apply.) Good luck!

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/home_school.htm

[halobeam]

23. Thanks. As I go on with my conversing here, and my reading

I'm developing a good list of specific questions. Everyone here is so generous with their help.

Thank you!

[trof]

15. Probably pretty easy...IF...

There's a good private school in your area and you have the bucks for tuition.

Our daughter went to a private high school.
We had the bucks and the public school had a bad drug rep.
This was in the 80s.

And just because of that one decision, here's how her life turned out:
She says she learned more in high school, had better teachers, really enjoyed school,etc. more than when she was in college (U. Conn.).
She made some good lifelong friends. They're friends of ours now, too. Have been since their school days. Just a great bunch of kids.
She met her future husband there.
He's like a son to us. I can't say enough good things about him.
She's now 37, with two kids, and very happily married.

If you can hack it financially, and there's a good school available, I'd go for it.
Good luck.

[halobeam]

29. That is one hell of a good outcome!

I could only hope for such a great result for my son! Regarding finances, I have to be seriously creative. I know some priv. schools lower tuition if a parent offers time working at the school, just as one example. Someone also mentioned there are programs that enable some "financially challenged" families to afford priv. school. I think vouchers are one aspect, but there are other programs as well. This needs much investigation. I think it'll take time to figure out. In the meanwhile, I am going to check out a few links on this thread and try to get some questions answered regarding home-schooling for the remainder of this year. I want this info before I address the teachers, the guidance counselor and the principal. I like to be prepared!

[teacher gal]

16. halobeam

I'm so sorry. Everything about NCLB and high-stakes testing serves to demoralize and defeat, and destroy public education. Believe me, this is the baby of the corporate/politicos and big business is benefiting mightily from it. I cannot blame you in the least for wanting to pull your son out of his school and into private school...yet sadly this is the way it works in the corporate scheme of things. They would never subject their own kids to such an oppressive regime. Again, it all serves to undermine public education but the important immediate thing is that you have to do what is best for your son. I'd really like to continue this conversation but have to go work at my school for a few hours. I'm writing in a rush so hope I'm making sense.

May I make a suggestion? Have you already signed the petition to end NCLB? If not, it's at www.educatorroundtable.org. Your comments here are powerful and you could copy them and leave them on the petition. We also have a discussion site www.educatorroundtable.net if you'd like to leave comments there. You will find support and understanding there.

We are just a grassroots group with precious little money but we're doing what we can. It is all strictly volunteer work. No one has earned a dime but we have spent much of our own time, effort, and money.

I wish your son the very best...he and all of our children deserve far better.

Would you consider posting your comments at our .net site? Tell them I sent you if you'd like.

Tauna Rogers

[Pacifist Patriot]

18. I'm so sorry. I didn't realize NY was so hostile to homeschoolers.

I know California is (eek what a court ruling last month!)

I'm afraid I do not know much about transferring a child into a private school during the school year. Though I can't imagine it would be too difficult provided the private school had space and was willing to accept the student mid-term.

If you are seriously interested in homeschooling here is a link for information about doing it in NY. http://homeschooling.gomilpitas.com/regional/NewYork.htm

The Homeschool Legal Defense Association has a section on New York as well. http://www.hslda.org/hs/state/NY/default.asp

I love homeschooling. I find it funny that the two most vocal ojections are the least realistic.

1. "Your children won't learn how to get along with others (i.e. socialization) if they are home all the time." Well first of all, we AREN'T home all the time. We have more trouble limiting our schedule than we do finding interactive things to do.

2. "Oh my goodness, I could never be organized enough to homeschool my kids." Said in an incredulous tone that clearly conveys the idea that they think you couldn't possibly be either. The odd thing is that I could never be organized enough to deal with the school schedule. But with the one-to-one ratio we get what most people consider traditional school work done in a fraction of the day. My fifth grader is doing work at least two to three years above peer level and he is far from being a genius. Gifted would be pushing the label. It's just that we move at his speed. When he gets it we move on. When he doesn't we do it over until he gets it. Teaching one child does not require the organization necessary for classroom control.

Good luck! I'm sure your son will do well with a parent who cares as you do.

[halobeam]

32. I have to agree with you ....

The two most vocal objections are the least realistic...

Number two is almost FUNNY. Almost. I know the organization it takes to deal with the school schedule, and if you can do that, you can do ANYTHING!! I can hardly juggle his five core subjects with him, with five different teachers... so, tell me, how could it not be better organized when teaching it yourself?! It's absurd, actually.

Thanks for the kind words. I care so much, I'm willing to do whatever it takes for him to be an educated and happy person. I believe that the two can co-exist; really, I feel, they must!

[ikojo]

22. Aren't private schools more demanding

than public schools?

I suspect he'll have just as much, if not more, homework in a private school.

[ScreamingMeemie]

24. Not true at all. My daughter is in a private school and most of the work,

until high school, was easily completed and understood in school. Also, there are smaller student to teacher ratios. In her French class there are four other students. When a student needs help, they get it. Which does make for better prepared kids.

[Breeze54]

28. I was a whole year ahead of my 10th grade class, when I transferred

from parochial school to public school.

[ScreamingMeemie]

25. I do not know if they have this in your state, but I know a lot of parents

in MI are putting their children into charter schools. They are more on level with private schools with regard to classroom sizes and teacher student ratios and don't cost. AGain, I am not sure if they have them in NY. Good luck. I'm running my own special brand of public school troubles with our son right now.

[halobeam]

30. Thank you!

I'll have to check if our state has charter schools, and while I do that, I'll have to look up exactly what they are. LOL. I am new to all of this, as my siblings and friends all went to public school. It isn't like it used to be, that's for sure. I actually went to the school that my son is in now, and it's sad to see what it's become.

[Lex]

26. are "charter schools" an option in your area?

we have them here in NC . . . some are really good, others are just so-so

[halobeam]

33. Not sure.

This was just brought up, on an earlier post. I have to check it out. How do you know which ones are good, and which ones are just so-so? Are they rated?

[lildreamer316]

39. PLEASE look for a Friends school in your area.

A quaker school = Friends school.
I went to one, GREAT environment for learning and development! Not restrictive at all; really small classes.
Best of luck.

[Drum]

40. There's a Friends school a little bit north of NYC

(and probably numerous others) but this one I visited briefly, and it was a special place. If I had young'uns I'd try to enroll 'em with the Friends. Don't know where in NY halobeam is, but hope she'll check one out near her.

[Connonym]

41. Friend of mine who works for the public schools advised me to look into section 504

Americans with Disabilities Act, and Education Reform. I'm actually taking my daughter to a doctor tomorrow and she's to be tested for dyslexia, etc., because she's struggling so much in school but when they evaluate her they say she's not bad enough to qualify for special ed; however, with this section of the Americans with Disabilities Act schools have to make reasonable accommodations to help a child with a disability that interferes with their ability to learn. This can include something like anxiety, for example. It's not a permanent cure but it would perhaps buy you some time to explore other options or round up other parents and find out how they feel about it. Nothing gets results faster than a group of parents going to the school board, where I live anyway. Good luck. It's awful to watch your child struggle and feel helpless to make the situation better. Let us know how you resolve it please.

[elleng]

43. My daughter's principal,

catholic school, DC, suggested testing her for learning differences; that was/is a very good school. learning differences were found, and we found 2 catholic high schools with programs for such. 'differences' cover lots and lots of things, dyslexia etc, and each school addressed them differently.

DC public schools struggle with providing special stuff that such students are entitled to, often send kids to private schools. Suburban schools do better, but still struggle. Whatever one does, keep an eye out on progress.

Daughter is now a college sophomore, majoring in earlychildhood special ed!

[Whoa_Nelly]

42. A book you may be interested in that may help

Read about it here:
http://www.thecaseagainsthomework.com/excerpt.php

[halobeam]

45. thanks Whoa

I know this is the case for most people, but it's getting to a tipping point here. I wonder if it is also hitting other homes right now, more than it was just last year!

I'd love to find out how many letters the school sent out during Feb. recess, saying their 7th grade child is in danger of failing.

[LibDemAlways]

44. I could have written your post except that my

daughter is a 9th grader and we live in California.

We live in a suburban area where parents demand high standards and the schools attempt to deliver. The only problem is they operate under the assumption that every kid is going to be applying to Harvard, and they structure the curriculum accordingly.

There is too damn much homework, and too much of it takes the form of nonsense art projects that waste time and teach the kids nothing. Posters. Powerpoints. Flip Books. Travel Brochures. And on and on.

When they aren't assigning some ridiculous art project that many times gets turned over to the parents for "help" (cough, cough), they are assigning stuff that's simply beyond the kids - i.e., the research paper which you describe, that the average 7th grader is simply going to make a mess of unless, of course, a parent oversees every detail - more of the aforementioned "help." I don't know why the schools can't assign age and ability-level appropriate work these days, but I sure as hell know nobody expected me to dissect a cow's eye in 7th grade, as my daughter was required to do.

I agree that the system is abusive. I pulled my daughter out of Honors Science after the first semester this year because the amount of work for that one class alone was absurd. Unit Tests weekly covering hundreds of pages at a time. Research papers due every two weeks. Honors classes around here don't necessarily mean more challenging work - just more work.

As it is she has no social life, but the school offers practically no fun extra-curricular activities anyway. Even the clubs on campus exist for the sole purpose of looking good on a college application. As another parent said to me the other day, "It's all about building a resume."

I honestly don't know what the solution is, but I substitute in this district and can tell you from experience that your son is doing better than many kids, and the fact that you take an active interest helps a lot. If he's not involved in some activity outside of school, get him involved. No 7th grade kid should be in the house all the time doing homework. And don't let the stress get to you. It's only 7th grade and summer is on the horizon.

If you are determined to get him out of the system, visit some local private schools and get a feel for how they're run and what the expectations are.

I'm in the trenches, too, and know what you are going through. If you ever want a sympathetic ear, PM me.

[MissB]

46. One of the most popular elective in our middle school is:

Study Hall.

The school recognized that the kids needed time during the day to do the homework that the teachers expected them to complete at night. So many of the kids are busy with afterschool activities- sports, clubs, volunteering, work, etc - that there aren't enough hours in the day.

More than that, around here you can opt your child out of state testing. Just do it. Get the pressure off of him.

Our school's guideline for homework is 10 minutes/grade (so a 4th grader would get not more than 40 minutes of homework a night and a 7th grader would have just over an hour a night).

If you're serious about homeschooling, then you should be able to google up some homeschooling resources in your area. Most of them will start off with a discussion of the laws in your state - many states take a fairly lax approach wrt requirements. With luck, you might be living in one of those states.

If you think your son is a self-starter and would do well at home, then consider a period of unschooling so that he can ramp down from the busy, crazy life he is in, and then get him going on his own interests. Researching something within his own interests will allow him to develop the skills he needs. It is a bit more informal than regular homeschooling. Note: I've never homeschooled, but I've researched it, or I stayed at a Holiday Inn last night. I.e. - take my advice with a grain of salt.

To me, homeschooling doesn't mean duplicating a curriculum set forth by the school. Instead, it is a tool to free a child to develop on their own terms.