Hold on to your seats, everyone - I'm gonna fold space.

[Rabrrrrrr]

I'm gonna fold us into a reality in which Al Gore lost the election to George Bush in 2000, our country was attacked by Saudi Arabian/Al Qaeda terrorists in late 2001, we went to war with Iraq in response in 2003, the economy has tanked, John Kerry lost to George Bush ibn 2004, Republican crimes go unpunished even after a miraculous democratic majority came into power in 2006, the economy continues to tank, the US is considering war with Iran in response to some kind of non-existent attack that is yet to happen with weapons that they don't have, and congress spends its time investigating steroid use in baseball and hiring male and female prostitutes and/or trolling for hits in public bathrooms while the economy continues to tank and we borrow a half trillion dollars a year to finance the war in Iraq , a war that has now lasted a year longer than WWII and has achieved no more than we achieved on the day of the Pearl Harbor attack.

Why am I going to fold us into that reality?

Because I'm an asshat. That's why.

Nyah.

[Parche]

1. Rabrrrrr was such an a$$hat holding on to our seats that when they told him to fold some space he

thought they said fold his____________

Match Game....Rabrrrrr style........:rofl: :rofl:


:hi:

[GOPisEvil]

2. Oh come on, if you're going to fold space, at least be realistic.

Who would ever believe all that stuff would happen?

[Rabrrrrrr]

4. I know, I know. I'm not very good at coming up with believable fiction.

I wanted something seemingly utterly impossible, but that might really happen, and I guess I went overboard.

x(

Obviously a universe like that could never, ever exist.

[GOPisEvil]

6. George Bush? Seriously? That asshat was Governor here.

He couldn't even order lunch without fucking up. You chose HIM?

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. I probably should have chosen someone more realistic. You're right.

I get ahead of myself.

I hang my head in shame...

No one would believe in an America that would elect George W. Bush, I know.

[GOPisEvil]

11. I'd have picked McCain myself.

Come on, The Straight Talk Express? That has White House ALL over it.

[Aristus]

3. Don't you need spice before you can fold space?

[Capn Sunshine]

5. can we unfold now?

I prefer that other reality
the one where Al Gores people listened to Clintons people and Richard Clark so there was no 9-11 and then they went on that re-equip the US gov't computer system binge so there was no tech crash because of the overwhelming sales orders and then they realized global warming was getting out of hand so they embarked on a NASA style program to find an alternative green method of propulsion, and they did and we shared it with the rest of the world because we're Americans, that's what we do, and the craze for small craft design came about because it was more eco-friendly and local, and everyone decided that those crazy asshat neocons were just way over the top and people gradually let go of those craven beliefs just laughed at people who expressed them and gave them flowers and someone figured out how to make unicorns from cloned horses with goat DNA and chicks everywhere were happy again and someone else started giving away giant marshmallows....

[siligut]

24. I am moving to your dimension.

I think I will hire some of those guys who stand outside of Home Depot to help me with all my stuff. Do you think they are reliable and safe? I have a lot of stuff.

[SOteric]

7. Oh Phurphoo.

Next you'll be telling us you'll include a total flushing of the insurance system and you'll revanmp the bankruptcy laws so that the debtors prison seems more favourable.

[Rabrrrrrr]

9. Both of those, PLUS, it'll be a world in which we are not only borrowing trillions

to finance this war, but at the same time cut taxes on the wealthiest people and on corporations, while increasing taxes on the working poor.

Oh, and we won't sign the Kyoto protocol, either, and will instead increase the levels of mercury and other toxins that companies can dump into the environment.

And lastly, our entire system of international relations will be a 19th century American dispensationalist reading of the book of Revelation as interpreted through the eyes of Tim Lehaye and Jerry Falwell.

[SOteric]

10. What will we have to do

to bribe you into refolding space? Not that I don't appreciate your artistic vision.

[Rabrrrrrr]

15. You have to rub my tummy and feed me Pez.

[Oeditpus Rex]

12. Can you fold it into a bunny?

[Rabrrrrrr]

13. How about, perhaps, a badger?

:rofl:

[Oeditpus Rex]

14. JEEsus CHRIST!

[lildreamer316]

17. A rabbit is a sphere. n/t

[Oeditpus Rex]

21. No, it's a RABBIT!

To call it a "sphere" and imply that it cannot or should not be folded is shapeist and divisive and sends the wrong message about the Leporidant Party.

This campaign should be about the issues, not about shape.



:spank:

[lildreamer316]

25. You Shapeist!!!

Kirk: Do you love him, Companion?
Companion: Uh... yes? Yes, I do. I think.
Kirk: You can't love! You're a blob.
Companion: You shapeist! I'll show you...
Commissioner Hedford (Companion): Hello, Zefram. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
McCoy: It seems they've merged. Let's call it the Compassioner.


(http://www.fiveminute.net/startrek/fiver.php?ep=metamorphosis)

[GreenPartyVoter]

16. *snarf* You nut. I lurves ya!

[Dr. Strange]

18. You did not post this...

you are not here.

[Rabrrrrrr]

19. I feel a storm coming...

[Shine]

20. After you're done folding space, why don't you come over and fold my laundry?

:evilgrin:

I've got 6 loads of it waiting on the couch for you.

[PVnRT]

22. Yeah, right. What else, do the Red Sox actually win the World Series, too?

Oh, and I bet that we haven't done anything about global warming, either.

Stick to your day job.

[Rabrrrrrr]

27. Yes, actually, I will have the Red Sox win the world series. Twice.

And the Yankees will lose in their only two appearances.

And a black man and a white woman are running for the Democratic nomination.

The Republicans chose a guy who was part of the S&L scandal's Keating Five. Which, of course, is the only believable part of the whole new world I'm folding.

[Deep13]

23. Goddammit!

I was just riding along in my solar-powered hover car on the way to my six-figure part-time job. I was coming from my doctor's appointment at the National Health Department and listening to President Gore on the radio give a new house to the last poor family in America. All the while, the last terrorist just completed anger-management classes and landed a job at the Refreeze the Arctic project.

Suddenly, everything changed and the world has gone to shit!

[applegrove]

26. I so wish that power existed. I'd do a little folding myself.