Stupid is as Stupid does (please contribute early & often) -- I'll start...

[Indi Guy]

This was all my fault:

I have a tendency to mumble & expect everyone understand what I'm saying.

On St. Pete Beach I was at a beach bar & wanted to go swimming, but I only had jeans-shorts on. I asked my friend Robin (the bartender) to "watch" my wallet. She asked me a number of times if I was serious.

I assured Robin that I was serious, whereupon she ran my wallet under the faucet. I immediately asked, "WTF are you doing?"

She said, "Well you asked me to "wash" your wallet!?"

I still mumble allot, but I've learned not to transpose "watch" with "wash."

[dembotoz]

1. i married who i married