Rescued hiker was high: only "thought" he broke his leg

[MonkeyFunk]

http://www.santacruzsentinel.com/ci_9103856

Yeah, a real headline from my local paper.

LOS GATOS -- Matthew Rosenberg, 18, didn't trip and break his leg Monday night in the Santa Cruz Mountains, causing an expensive search-and-rescue that began with a desperate cell phone call to his mother and ended with a police dog tracking him down about an hour later.

Instead, Rosenberg, a Los Gatos High School senior, apparently ate some hallucinogenic mushrooms, possibly dropped some acid and just "thought" he broke his leg, Capt. Bill Finch with Cal Fire's Burrell Station said Tuesday.

"He was really gorked," Finch said of Rosenberg's condition when rescuers found him standing near a rock at the bottom of a ravine -- more amused and bewildered than safe and sound. "He wasn't normal. He was like one of those guys who's been drinking a lot and starts saying, 'I love ya, man.'"

[petronius]

1. "Gorked"? Must be a technical SAR term...

:rofl:

What an incredible dumbass...

[mcctatas]

2. Well the problem was he did the shrooms and the acid at the

same time! Everyone knows you must not mix your hallucinogens....
Oh wait, that's beer and hard liquor....

[nomorenomore08]

3. Ahhh, my alma mater... UC Santa Cruz, that is, not Los Gatos High.

I had quite a few, um, interesting experiences during my years there, but no substance ever made me imagine a phantom injury. That's a whole unprecedented level of "fucked up."

[MonkeyFunk]

4. the term now is "gorked"

Catch up with the times.

[ScreamingMeemie]

5. "Gorked"

A great, all encompassing term.

[appal_jack]

6. like trying to grok something...

...but not quite being able to get it in order. So you're "gorked."

Heinlein would be proud.

-app

[SallyMander]

7. Hey! Where've you been?

Hope spring is treating you well! :loveya:

[appal_jack]

13. out & about, trying to grok this crazy world...

Happy Beltane & May Day SallyMander!:loveya:

and the same to all the other wonderful DU'ers reading this!! :grouphug:

-app

[Throd]

8. I have been that gorked

Back in 1984 I took several hits of acid and ended up cowering in fear for several hours from a "bear" that was crouching near me in a field. It turned out that it was really a large piece of rumpled up brown carpet. Also, this field was in Citrus Heights, California.

[bikebloke]

9. I dated a chick who was naturally gorked.

One night in bed she thought someone else was in the bed with us. So she said to the person, "Excuse me...EXCUSE ME!!!....EXCUSE ME!!!!!!". The other person turned out to be the blanket piled to the side. And she only discovered that when it finally turned light.

The joys of being a freak magnet.

[Shine]

10. Only in Santa Cruz, man.

:eyes: I read that story, too.

:hi: how's your back feelin'?

[MonkeyFunk]

12. meh

it's still gorked. I'm expecting my inversion table to arrive today, though. I'm pinning my hopes on it.

[KSinTX]

11. Truly gorked situation

[Deep13]

14. Bill him for the rescue.

Asshole.

[KSinTX]

15. Hey MonkeyFunk, aren't you s'posed to be at work

in your long pants?

[darkstar]

16. That's gorked up.

Gorking hippies.

[parasim]

17. God only really knows if the man's a vegetable...

Main Entry: gork
Pronunciation: grk
Function: noun
medical slang, usually disparaging : a terminal patient whose brain is nonfunctional and the rest of whose body can be kept functioning only by the extensive use of mechanical devices and nutrient solutions
- gorked /grkt/ adjective, medical slang, usually disparaging

http://medical.merriam-webster.com/medical/gork

or...

Acronym Definition
GORK God Only Really Knows

http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/GORK


In other words: GORK if the man was gorked.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

18. I know someone who didn't realize in the midst of his trip...

that a porcupine had skewered his ankle. He didn't realize it until he put his shoes on.