This lounge-thread topic occurred to me yesterday: If you had an evil twin, what would they be like?

[Richard Steele]

(Aside from voting Republican, of course- that goes without saying.)

I think mine would be spending this Saturday anally pulling weeds
out of the perfectly manicured front yard, and counting the money
from the furniture commission he managed to get paid for 3 weeks ago
by cutting corners and handing off a second-rate piece of work to
his clients.



Surprisingly, my Sweetie just woke up as I was typing this,
and I have a feeling that my "evil twin" would be logging off of DU
and trying to "get lucky" while she was groggy and half-awake.

I say "surprisingly", because I'm surprised to discover that my
evil twin and I have more in common than I imagined just 2 minutes ago.


I'm logging off now- good morning, DU! :hi:

[Orsino]

1. Too lazy to keep his goatee properly trimmed. n/t

[Richard Steele]

12. I was in the kitchen just now, making a pizza, when I suddenly "got" that!

BWAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!:rofl: :toast: :rofl:

[Connonym]

2. I already am the evil twin n/t

[Tuesday Afternoon]

3. sneaky !

I wish I was.

[DarkTirade]

4. My evil twin may be evil...

but he's got enough of a sense of self-preservation to not vote republican.

There's evil, and then there's just plain stupid. :P

[Richard Steele]

7. LOL!!!!!!nm

[HamdenRice]

5. I have two celebrity twins already

I used to get stopped in the East Village and asked when my band was coming to New York again. I was like, huh?

People used to assume I was Michael Collins, lead singer of the Detroit neo-soul/rock group, The Dirtbombs.

The other is Ron Allen, the foreign correspondent for NBC news. Looking at some of his pictures is like looking in the mirror.

[Maraya1969]

20. You look just like my doctor! And he looks just like his wife, (no offense you'll understand)

The both have that real tan ?look with bright big eyes, (you're pretty darn cute btw).

I've never had to guts to ask what their heritage is so I'll ask you.

ummmmmmmm........

What is your heritage?



Just realized I'm talking like I'm talking to Ron Allen but you're not really Ron Allen, you're someone who looks like Ron Allen and someone else whose name I can't remember. So when I said you were cute I was really looking at the picture of Ron Allen but if you look just like Ron Allen then you are cute too!

[HamdenRice]

31. He's a little younger than me

but we really do look alike. The other guy was Mick Collins of the Dirt Bombs.

My heritage is pretty normal for an African American. Five of my eight great grandparents were slaves, all in Virginia. One great grandmother was a black woman from the West Indies (Virgin Islands) and one great grandfather was an East Indian from the West Indies (I know it sounds strange, but many Indians were sent to the West Indies as "coolie" laborers when slavery was ended). One great grandmother was either Irish or an African American-Irish mulatta, but we don't know much about her because she was a "dance hall girl" who placed her children (including my maternal grandmother) in an orphanage.

[SOteric]

6. My evil twin

is DS1.

[Fox Mulder]

8. I have a twin brother.

And he's just as liberal as I am.

[Richard Steele]

9. So, if you two had a PAIR of evil twins...

...are they still called evil twins, or would they be evil quads? :shrug:

[Midlodemocrat]

10. dicksteele is my evil twin. Only he doesn't know it.

That's how evil *I* am.

[Richard Steele]

13. That guy is frickin clueless.

:rofl:

[crimsonblue]

11. my twin would have all sorts of global domination schemes...

none of which come to fruition. who am i kidding? I am my own evil twin...

[Xipe Totec]

14. My evil twin started his own company

He's the guy in the jet counting money...

http://www.every10mins.com/video/4357_harvey_birdman_sebben_and_sebben_employee_orientation.html

[Blue-Jay]

15. He'd probably think that *I* was the evil twin.

He might be correct, too.

[unpossibles]

16. wait, which one's evil again

and how do we tell each other apart?

And for the record, even my evil twin is smart enough to not vote Republican.

[Richard Steele]

18. I think the rule of thumb is:

If you don't know which one's evil, it's you.

[BlueIris]

17. Opportunistic Hillary OR Obama campaign staffer who will do anything to advance a candidacy,

has her drug dealer on speed dial, is an avowed Christian, (but also an atheist) beats small animals for fun, and abandoned her parents to die alone of their chronic illnesses four years ago. With gorgeous hair she gets trimmed weekly.

[Richard Steele]

22. Georgeous hair? Now that's evil! nm

[BlueIris]

19. Kick.

[Generic Brad]

21. Mine would be evil and would look just like me

Hence, the term "evil twin".

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

23. Your evil twin has a HELL of a sphincter muscle.

"Anally pulling weeds." Wow.

[Richard Steele]

28. LOLS! nm

[Chan790]

24. I have an evil twin...

except we're not related actually. We have the same first name though and can pass for one another on appearance.

He's my best friend in the universe and he is about as far from me as two people could be: A hunting, SUV-driving, all-flirt-all-the-time, former-campaign-volunteer-for-Santorum, anti-Easter-Accord (meaning pro-"real" IRA), carnivore, former-Catholic-missionary, militantly-straight, family-oriented, extreme-RW Republican.

If you met both of us at different times, you'd never believe he's the one person in the world I'm closest to. We're thick as thieves. When someone I thought was my friend sexually-assaulted my girlfriend in college, he offered to bring the shotgun, garden lime AND the shovel. When I kicked the ever-living hell out of that former friend, he provided an unimpeachable alibi. When my fiance broke up with me unexpectedly, he excused himself from meeting his (now) fiance's parents to drive all night to make sure I didn't do anything stupid...like jump off the Woodrow Wilson Bridge (admittedly contemplated). When I was homeless, he offered his roommate's couch and forced his roommate to like it.

He is the Fortinbras (all action, no contemplation) to my overly-cerebral Hamlet. It might be unmanly to admit but I love him like family. He'd kick my ass if he heard me say it.

[Cabcere]

25. Mine would probably be smarter

so I could TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!1!!111!!! *cue maniacal laugh and evil music*

:D

[Dr. Strange]

26. If I had an evil twin, he would probably post here on DU too.

And he'd have the other half of this amulet:

[madeline_con]

27. My evil twin would be an oil baron woh would

be destroying the habitat of a very rare and beautiful creature that had a small gland in its head (that it could easily live without) that was a cure for cancer.

I'd drive a huge gas-guzzler, a huge noisy boat, huge noisy jet skis and scare off all the fish. I'd treat my employess like shit, and have spoiled inconsiderate children who thought the world owed them something.

[hyphenate]

29. An evil twin

Actually, that's easy. My evil twin would be getting all my vengeance work done for me. Anyone who has done me wrong in one way or another will earn my evil twin's wrath. She will do all the murders and other acts of vengeance against these people that I simply dream about harming

Some political assassinations, throwing people down flights of stairs, hit and run accidents, etc. I could never do things like that myself, but I think of things like this frequently, and having such a twin would give me a leg up. (I am a great mystery fan)

So beware! Don't piss me off! :rofl:

[Richard Steele]

30. Of course you do realize....

Being EVIL, she'll naturally plant evidence that
will lead to -YOU- being convicted of all those crimes,
while she walks away scot-free.