Job Resume (Thank you DickSteele for the help!)

[WillParkinson]

Resimay


To hoom it mae
cunsern,


I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper. I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting.



I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person, Pepole really seam to respond to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.



I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety. My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can s tart emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.



Sinseerly,

TOM nikname Beefy



PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of
me.





















Employer's response:...



Dear Beefy-I mean TOM,


It's OK honey, we've got spell check. See you Monday!

[WillParkinson]

1. You mean...

No one wants to hire this poor boy? I'm sure he could take shorthand or dictation...

[auntAgonist]

2. uh you said

dicktashun. :rofl:

this is great, gave me a good laugh.

thanks.

[WillParkinson]

3. I also said "short hand"

For those who didn't have a lot to offer. I was trying to appeal to everyone.

And where's Catwoman? I'm certain she'd be able to offer him a position.

[Richard Steele]

4. Only 1 response so far? That's not right!

You got more responses to the thread asking for
help with the picture. What's up with that? :shrug:

[WillParkinson]

5. Perhaps hot boys...

make the screen steam up?

[Richard Steele]

6. Personally, I suspect that putting my name in the OP Header was a bad move.

I'm kind of an ASSHOLE, and most DUers know that by now.
My name in an OP tends to depress turnout, knowhutImean?

Try posting this again tomorrow, under a different title.
(If you feel you MUST give me credit, do it at the END
of the post, in parentheses, like it was an irrelevant afterthought.)

I bet you'll see a much better Lounge response.

[WillParkinson]

7. The heck with that...

If being "kind of an asshole" was grounds for not using a name then a lot more than us wouldn't ever get mentioned in a post.

In the Lounge I think being an asshole to some degree help keeps most of us sane. (Except for certain people who'd be insane no matter what.)

Doesn't mean we love them any less. They're like the relatives our parents didn't want us to talk with but they always had the best stories.

[WillParkinson]

8. Damn you, Catwoman, where are you when he needs you???!!!

Just wondering, of course.