Are sex and fighting inversely correlated?

[IronLionZion]

My girlfriend and I haven't been intimate in like a month and it's a problem because we are both more passionate than the average Americans. I'm not going to get into the reasons, but I assure you it's nothing bad. Don't ask. ;)

But we are fighting more often over stupid things that not even worth it. We very rarely fight. The last time we had a notable increase in fighting was when I was away on business for 6 weeks and we would fight over the phone. We're both loyal so we made do without sex during that time.

So is it the lack of sex? If so, I am really dreading the future as I'm moving away real soon to grad school and we're going to try the long distance thing. It's going to be a long 2 years if our relationship lasts that long. We are approaching the 1 year anniversary of our relationship next month.

What's been your experience?

Any thoughts?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

1. well generally a lack of sex means something else is also going on

so yes those things are correlated but it isnt causation

[IronLionZion]

4. No, there is a reason for lack of sex

I'm just not revealing it to DU out of respect for privacy. Trust me, we both want sex.

But I suspect there are issues causing the fighting and was wondering if the lack of sex might be causing or amplifying it. And I was hoping to hear from people who have had these experiences.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. well frustration is a good reason to be aggressive

[IronLionZion]

8. yeah, that's what I'm thinking. It makes us both frustrated and tense. nt

[DS1]

2. And here I was, expecting a rodeo thread

.

[IronLionZion]

5. That could be painful.

ouch!

[skygazer]

3. I get cranky when I'm not getting any

And everyone around me suffers. That's my experience. :shrug:

[IronLionZion]

6. Sounds like it might be the case. nt

[crimsonblue]

9. I think blaming fighting on sex is a copout.. IMO...

Relationships shouldn't be centered on sex; they should be built on understanding and communication. If you are sexually frustrated, then join the one man band like millions of men do. Sex isn't something you should allow to dominate your thoughts. Yeah, I love sex just as much as the next guy, but my life isn't centered around it. Talk out your problems and try to come to an understanding as to why you get in fights.. are either of you trying to cause fights?

[IronLionZion]

11. Yes, of course

I was wondering if sex amplified the frustrations and it sounds like it probably has.

[crimsonblue]

13. nah, it hasn't so much...

sex is the last thing I let frustrate me.. too much other bullshit going on to let that get me down..

[bikebloke]

10. Mix up of words.

I once had a Swiss-French girlfriend whose English wasn't the best. She kept mixing up the words "fighting" and "fucking", and constantly interchanged the usage. It was interesting, wondering what she really meant.

[unpossibles]

12. maybe a little

maybe the lack of sex can be increasing stress?

[Dora]

14. It's probably not so much the lack of sex as it is the lack of intimacy.

Find a sex substitute.