I want to find someone to love.

[blue cat]

Where do you suggest that I look? I'm on Chemistry.com and that site sucks. 44 yo female looking for male.

[Shell Beau]

1. I hate to sound cliche, but I think it comes when you least likely

expect it.

[blue cat]

3. So I should stop looking?

Hard for me to run into someone considering I work on the phone at a pedi office.

[Shell Beau]

4. No, but don't expect it. It is just one of those things.

When you aren't looking, then bam there it is!

[Lydia Leftcoast]

20. Do something besides work

Volunteer, or else join some sort of interest group or take a class.

Whether you meet someone or not, you'll make new friends and have more fun.

I don't have an SO and haven't for quite a while, but I don't mind it as much if my life is interesting in other ways.

[SammyWinstonJack]

19. It does. Nothing cliche about that. It's true.

[skygazer]

2. Chemistry.com sounds like a place to find a chemical

Maybe it's me...

I found my husband at the grocery store. :shrug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

5. I found my husband in 7th grade...only I didn't know it.

I found him again after we graduated...only I didn't know it.

I re-found him again at 22...I knew it that time.

[Shell Beau]

6. My husband and I were high school sweethearts!

Been married 6 years but have been together for 15! :o


:hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

7. We were together for 15, married for 11...knew him for 22.

May you have many, many happy years...

:hug:

[Shell Beau]

9. Aw, thanks!!

:pals:

[IndianaJones]

8. church. nt.

[XemaSab]

16. That doesn't work so well for women

:P

[Lydia Leftcoast]

21. XemaSab is right

Straight, single men rarely go to church.

In every church I've ever been to, there have lots of fantastic single and married women, lots of fantastic married men, lots of fantastic gay men and lesbians (and even transgendered at my current church), and lots of fantastic younger men who are so young that I'd feel more comfortable adopting them than dating them.

Straight guys, if you have any religious feelings at all, you are missing out on a great opportunity.

[Bucky]

31. My church is loaded with 40 something single straight guys.

Single women are rarer here, which should be odd for a UU church.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

40. Really? Where are you? Alaska?

:shrug:

[MissMillie]

33. oh yeah, church is loaded w/ single men

:sarcasm:

[redqueen]

10. Different things work better for different people...

As for me... I just pursue my own interests... and figure I'll eventually run across someone with the right chemistry who shares those interests and just go from there.

It's worked for me in the past, anyway.

Good luck. :)

[DarkTirade]

11. That's exactly what I was about to suggest.

Best way to meet someone is to go out and do stuff. :)

Unfortunately I haven't had the time or money to go out and do much lately... D'oh. :P

[Oeditpus Rex]

12. I gotta agree with Shelly

I've never used a dating site because I liken them to singles bars or clubs — everyone knows why everyone else is there, and that, I think, distorts perspectives.

Forums such as DU, on the other hand, where everyone's just hanging out and sharing ideas, can be great places for relationships to foster without expectations.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

15. Quite the contrary, I believe.

I think the fact that everyone knows why everyone else is there relaxes things quite a bit. There's no guessing on intentions, there's no wondering why someone's talking to you... there are no real pretentions about what anyone wants. I found that very beneficial, and I found my wife on a dating site.

[HERVEPA]

13. Might want to try OKCUPID.COM. Fun site with wacko user-made-up...

tests. You can make up your own if you like.

[blue cat]

14. ok

will try it.

[One_Life_To_Give]

17. Bait Shop

Guys hearts go all aflutter for a girl with a boat and motor.

[Schema Thing]

18. Polygamy Ranch!

[Bucky]

32. Bad advice for any lady over the age of 17.

[Schema Thing]

35. I saw plenty of strapping young lads on the news

are you telling me it doesn't work that way?

[Bucky]

36. Only in public middle schools

And those judges don't send you back home after just three weeks.

[RetroLounge]

22. Makes no difference anyhow.

someone always f*cks over someone else.

RL

[BarenakedLady]

23. Edited

My bitterness should be reigned in.

Never mind.

[Parche]

25. someday your prince will cum

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:hi:

:hug:

[BarenakedLady]

27. Ya think?

Smart ass.

[Sanity Claws]

24. get out and do things

I disagree with some of the posters about finding love when you're not expecting it. If you want a relationship, you must give it a priority and do things to make it happen.
I don't know you and so please don't get insulted by anything I write -- it's just general info.
1. Make sure you really want a relationship. Being conflicted about it will just attract other conflicted people to you. (My problem.)
2. Make your appearance a priority, all the time. Update your wardrobe and appearance. Be aware of how you look even if you are just going to the grocery store. You never know where you might run into someone you want to get to know better.
3. Tell your friends and family that you are looking. (Writing this post here is great!)
4. Get out and do things so that you meet new people, both male and female. Summer is here so you can go bicycling, hiking, even volunteering.


Despite all these things, you may not met someone appropriate. Sorry. But still, wouldn't you be happier with yourself knowing that you tried rather than just left things up to fate? Also, don't you think you'll have fun doing all these new things and learning more about yourself in the meantime?

Good luck. Oh, and if you find someone, ask him if he has a brother for me. ;)

[trof]

26. OK. You can love me.

And I'll love you back.
I checked with Miz t. and she says it's OK.
No touching, natch.

But you can just go ahead and love me all you want and I'll love you right back.
:-)

[redqueen]

28. I do too.

I think I'm just gonna give up though.

Good luck.

[hiaasenrocks]

29. I'm about to give up on that, too. 36 y/o male here in the same boat! n/t

[MissMillie]

30. same boat here

only I don't trust myself to pick one. After my track record, my sense is that if I'm interested then he's likely nothing but trouble.

[KG]

34. plentyoffish.com - totally free.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

37. The stuff none of us want to hear...

1). Gotta love yourself first (translation: you see yourself as a work in progress, like any other human being on the planet, and accept yourself unconditionally)

2). Do the things you like to do and go to the places you like to go to (Let's say one partner likes to go dancing and the other one doesn't. After the "new" wears off the relationship, the partner who likes to dance will never go dancing again as long as they stay with the one who doesn't like to dance).

3). Beauty is on the inside (actually, it's on the outside too, but if it's ONLY on the outside, it's what makes the difference between a "fling" or "affair" and "a relationship).

4). The harder you look, the less likely you are to find someone (true for some, less true for others, but spending as much time out in the world letting your MAGNIFICENT self SHINE is 1,000 times better than "looking for someone").

Like I said...timeless wisdom that most people don't want to hear.

I did the eHarmony thing. My reaction? A lot of people who are not ready to be in a relationship but go looking for one anyway.

Just go to all the places you love and do the things you like to to and make an effort to look and feel your best at all times.

You'll become a magnet.

That's how it's done.

:toast:

[Bennyboy]

38. I am with you there.......The online thing kind of sucks......

I might be doing it worng or something, but that just doesn't work for me.Not yahoo, Craiglist, Plentyoffish or any of them....
53... male.

[Forkboy]

39. For how long?

:hide:

[khashka]

41. Go places where you can meet people

Church, volunteer activities, political groups, community college classes. Whatever interests you, after all you don't want just any guy, but someone who is interested in/cares about the same things as you. Personal ads also work. My lover and I met through a personal ad of mine and we've been together 18 years.

Khash.

[Darth_Kitten]

42. Go to a professional matchmaker........

:)

Seriously, I'm aiming to go this route. :)