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I was diagnosed with Stage IV cervical or uterine cancer (we'll never know which) with metastases to my lungs on March 2 of this year. I was told it is inoperable and incurable but have come to learn that, at least for now, it is manageable. I had radiation therapy for the first month while I, too, sought a second opinion at M.D. Anderson. This delayed the onset of chemotherapy and that worried me but I was assured that cancer doesn't spread that quickly. There is no test for my cancer so we note progress through various scans. I've had several chest x-rays, CT scans, MRIs, and a PET scan. What I have seen since treatment began is a great reduction in the size and number of tumors. My doctor considers me some kind of miracle!
A diagnosis of cancer is NOT a death sentence. We don't know any more about when or how we're going to die than we did before the diagnosis. Treatments have improved greatly! While I can't say that I'm crazy about chemotherapy, it isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I've had seven rounds and begin my eighth on Wednesday. Each round for me consists of a full day of infusion plus about two hours each on the second and third days. I do this every three weeks. I take Emend, an anti-nausea drug, on those three days plus I take compazine as needed for the next three or four days. So far, I've had only two brief waves of nausea and that was after the first round because I didn't start the compazine as quickly as I should have. Since then, I've had no nausea or vomiting. I admit that I feel weak and tired for the next few days but I'm not bedridden. I just take it easy but I could go to the movies or out to dinner if I wanted to. I've been able to teach at community college throughout these treatments with just a couple of days off last spring and summer. I only teach on Tuesdays and Thursdays this semester so I don't need any days off. I've been going to acupuncture to help me with the chemo side-effects and I really believe that the treatments and herbs are helping (and I'm generally a skeptic about such things.)
I get cisplatin and topotcan which have thinned my hair but I'm not bald. However, I got a cute wig (I get lots of compliments!) to wear in public most of the time. I've also gained about 20 pounds, partly due to the steroids that I'm given during chemo, partly due to being 53 and menopausal, and mostly due to the attitude that, damn it!, I've got cancer and I'm eating those Oreos! :)
I recommend that you attend a support group, mostly so that you can be around other survivors. I found it very inspiring to see how many people are living with cancer, sometimes even several recurrences, for years after their initial diagnosis. I'm sure you're learning as much as you can and that's a good thing. But remember when you come across studies that they are generally old (two or three years is very old when it comes to cancer research and treatments) and the participants are not newly-diagnosed like you -- they are generally people for whom a clinical trial is their best hope because conventional treatments are no longer working. So the results can sound worse than they really are.
Surround yourself with positive people! I'm not religious but I accept all prayers and positive thoughts on my behalf. A dear DU friend, eleny, suggested using a cowboy boot stomping out the tumors as a visualization and, being from Texas, I thought that was a great idea. So I bought myself my first-ever pair of boots which I wear frequently and whenever I find myself feeling a little scared, I imagine those boots kicking and stomping the crap out of the tumors. I also suggest getting a prescription for a sleeping pill if you find it hard to sleep. Someone here at DU suggested that to me and they helped me so much. I never need them now. Believe it or not, you actually get used to living with cancer.
You can read my journal for more info about what I've been through since March. I won't try to tell you that there is nothing to worry about because no one knows. But I decided early on that, whatever time I have left, I'm not going to live it expecting to die. I expect to live as long as I can and as well as I can. I send out email updates to my family and friends and I've been lucky enough to be reminded how much I am loved. There are Buddhists praying for me in China and Jews praying for me in Israel, not to mention believers and nonbelievers wishing me the best in many places in between. It means a lot to me and helps me stay strong mentally and therefore, physically. And that's the key -- to stay strong enough to withstand the treatments.
Please feel free to ask questions -- by PM, if you'd prefer -- as you go through this. You became a cancer survivor the moment you got your diagnosis. My understanding is that there are new, highly-effective treatments for your type of cancer so you have every reason to be optimistic. I hate that you're having to go through this but you CAN survive this! I wish you the best! :hug:
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