The Stadium Pal: When you gotta go, but you wanna stay

[undeterred]

Poll question: The Stadium Pal: When you gotta go, but you wanna stay

Is this a joke?



The Stadium Pal is quit simple. It consists of 3 basic components.

The Male External Catheter. The external catheter is worn just like a condom. It is latex free, and made of silicone so there is no chance of a latex infection. It is lined with adhesive much like a band aid. When worn properly the male external will not leak or come off. Since every man is different the male externals come in 5 different sizes. And yes in this particular case size is important, but all one needs to do is to print out the SIZING GUIDE, cut out the half moons, and there is no guessing. This is a girth measurement, and has nothing to do with length.

FYI Stadium Pal Kits contain the Freedom Clear Male External Catheter

The 18” tubing connects to the External catheter, and to the collection bag. It is designed to be “cut to fit”. In most cases a few inches of tubing will need to be taken off. This is a good idea. It prevents kinks, which could interrupt the flow or urine into the collection bag. Extra sections of the 18" Tubing can be found here

The Collection Bag is the final item. The Stadium Pal comes with a 1000ml collection bag. That comes to about 34oz. Inside the bag is a flutter valve at the top of the bag. This prevents any back flow. So once urine enters the bag, the only way for it to go out is through the T-Tap valve at the bottom of the bag. Latex-Free Velcro® straps are also provided, and again designed to be cut to fit. Some men prefer a wider strap for greater comfort, we offer the Comfort, and Delux straps, but the ones provided do the job.

http://www.stadiumpal.com/what-makes-it-work.htm

[Fire Walk With Me]

1. "Is this a joke?"

Depends.

[mcctatas]

3. OMG!

:spray:

[tammywammy]

2. See David Sedaris:

Buddy, Can You Spare a Tie?
By David Sedaris

Lesson Four: With a pal like this, you don't need an enemy.

I've always liked the idea of accessories, those little pick-me-ups designed to invigorate what has come to feel drab and predictable. A woman might rejuvenate her outfit with a vintage Hermès scarf or a jaunty rope belt, but the options for men aren't nearly as interesting. I have no use for cuff links or suspenders, and while I'll occasionally pick up a new tie, it hardly leaves me feeling "kicky." Hidden accessories can do the trick, but, again, they're mainly the province of women. Garter belt and lingerie--yes. Sock garter and micro brief--no.

It was my search for something discreet, masculine, and practical that led me to the Stadium Pal, an external catheter currently being marketed to sports fans, truck drivers, and anyone else who's tired of searching for a bathroom. At first inspection, the device met all my criteria. Was it masculine? Yes, and proudly so. Knowing that no sensible female would ever voluntarily choose to pee in her pants, the manufacturers went ahead and designed the product exclusively for men. Unlike a regular catheter, which is inserted directly into the penis, the Stadium Pal connects by way of a self-adhesive condom, which is then attached to a flexible plastic tube. Urine flows through the tube and collects in the "Freedom Leg Bag," conveniently strapped to the user's calf. The bag can be emptied and reused up to twelve times, making it both disgusting and cost-effective. Was it discreet? According to the brochure, unless you wore it with shorts, no one needed to know anything about it. Was it practical? At the time, yes. I don't drive or attend football games, but I did have a book tour coming up, and the possibilities were endless. Five glasses of iced tea followed by a long public reading? Thanks, Stadium Pal. The window seat on an overbooked cross-country flight? Don't mind if I do!

I ordered myself a Stadium Pal and soon realized that, while it might make sense in a hospital, it really wasn't very practical for day-to-day use. In an open-air sporting arena, a piping-hot thirty-four-ounce bag of urine might go unnoticed, but not so in a stuffy airplane or a small, crowded bookstore. An hour after christening it, I smelled like a nursing home. On top of that, I found that it was hard to pee and do other things at the same time. Reading out loud, discussing my dinner options with the flight attendant, checking into a fine hotel: Each activity required its own separate form of concentration, and while no one knew exactly what I was up to, it was pretty clear that something was going on. I think it was my face that gave me away. That and my oddly swollen calf.

What ultimately did me in was the self-adhesive condom. Putting it on was no problem, but its removal qualified as what, in certain cultures, is known as a bris. Wear it once and you'll need a solid month in order to fully recover. It will likely be a month in which you'll weigh the relative freedom of peeing in your pants against the unsightly discomfort of a scab-covered penis, ultimately realizing that, in terms of a convenient accessory, you're better off with a new watchband.

http://www.esquire.com/ESQ0302-MAR_SEDARIS_3.3?click=main_sr

[undeterred]

4. He read this on Letterman and it was hilarious.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

7. YouTube Link...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBdymtyXt8Y

I am laughing my ass off at this

[tammywammy]

8. He has a CD "Live at Carnegie Hall"

H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S!

He reads Stadium Pal, along with others. :rofl:

[Heidi]

6. !!!! Oh, how I wish I could recommend this post!!

:rofl: :spray:

[bluedeminredstate]

11. I just read this book by Sedaris

I laughed until I was snorting and crying as I read this essay.

[tammywammy]

16. Oh yeah

I seriously laughed so hard I was crying the first time I read "6 to 8 Black Men" by him. Hilarious!

[CTyankee]

13. When my hubby was in the hospital he had to use the bed urinal, which is

a kind of bent necked plastic bottle. As he was fumbling with the thing under the sheet, the nurse asked if he "got it" okay. To which he replied, "Had a little problem with the angle of the dangle." It gave her quite a laugh...

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

5. My girlfriend owns something like this

I find it thoroughly disgusting,

[undeterred]

15. I bought something like this to go camping in the Amazon

It was unsuccessful, lets leave it at that.

[underpants]

9. The Stadium Pal says scores about our culture

and football fans don't tend to be (from my observations) exactly an "active" lot

Getting up to pee is just so tiresome and imagine missing a MINUTE of televised football game excitement!!!! :o

[undeterred]

10. Well, if you're wearing it watching at home

its pretty extreme! The long lines in stadiums could make you miss a lot of the game.

[azmouse]

12. OMG! I have this horrible image of men in Phoenix in the summer

using the Stadium Pal while wearing shorts.


I don't know whether to throw up or run for the hills.

[Liberal_in_LA]

14. Other - I didn't want to click on this thread but couldn't help myself.