Sorry to vent. I'm just so sad tonight.

[Mike 03]

My father has cancer and is undergoing radiation. His particular cancer is very unpredictable and it has affected his vision, infecting one of his eye sockets. So far the radiation has not helped. He's had five of his ten treatments so far, so maybe things will get better. But my father is the kind of person who depends on being able to read for his life force. His entire reason for existing is to learn, read, watch and see things... Like many of you, I'm sure, and like me. My life is books and reading, and if I couldn't read I have no idea what I would do.

His last few emails have sounded so sad. We had such high hopes that radiation would kill the cancer cells and restore his vision, but it's not working out so far.

This is kind of a turning point, because how that he is out of remission, so much of his "care" has become palliative: Putting out fires rather than fighting the cancer.

It's just very depressing. It is beginning to feel like the battle is being lost.

[Left Is Write]

1. I'm sorry, Mike.

That would make me very sad too. Sending good thoughts for you and your dad. :hug:

[Mike 03]

6. Thank you so much. Your good wishes mean a lot. NT

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. My dear Mike 03...

Ah, that is sad...

It is hard when your expectations are not being met, and it looks like they won't be...

Is there someone who knows a lot about these treatments that you might get answers from, who you could talk to?

And vent all you want...

This is what we're here for, sweetie...

:hug:

[Mike 03]

4. Thank you for your kind message.

He's in good hands, but there is only so much they can do. My father has some very bad genetic mutations that make his cancer hard to fight.

Thanks for your kind wishes. It means a lot!

[auntAgonist]

3. I'm so sorry Mike, I wish I could make that sadness

go away. Cancer is horrible and my heart goes out to your Father and your entire family.

:hug:

Maybe things will get better, he's only half way through the radiation treatments. My Dad is an avid reader too. I can't imagine him not being with book in hand. There are lots of reading aids if his vision diminishes. Vision lost, there are audio books although not every one likes them. Anyway, best wishes to your Father, hang in there.

aA
kesha

[leftyclimber]

5. Not the same as words on the page but still the world of books:

The National Library Service for the Blind and Physically Handicapped. It's a Library of Congress program. Your dad may qualify, and will need a letter from his doctor saying that because of his cancer he cannot read standard type. You can get more information about the program here:

http://www.loc.gov/nls/

Your dad may have to learn some new strategies for doing stuff (like getting talking books from the Library of Congress, maybe ;)) And he can still learn and read no matter how bad his eyesight is. He can still experience life no matter how bad his eyesight is.

Please don't assume that someone's life is over because they don't see well. It's not the greatest of shakes, but it can be dealt with. Really.

I'm sorry you, your dad, and the rest of your family are having to deal with this, Mike. It's just darn unpleasant, to put it mildly. Mr_leftyclimber's dad was recently diagnosed with inoperable cancer and we're finding out darn fast that it's a hard blow to deal with.

:hug:

-lefty "lousy eyesight" climber

[Sky Masterson]

7. I'm sorry.

I hope for the best for your pops. :hug:

[fizzgig]

8. i can't imagine how difficult this is for all of you

i hope things improve for your father :hug:

[bluesbassman]

9. So sorry to hear this Mike.

Hang in there brother, it just may turn around. Peace and strength to you and your father.:hug:

[Swede]

10. Sad news,Mike.

I hope your dad bounces back.

[RiffRandell]

11. I'm so sorry.

What type of cancer? My husband is a stage 3 head and neck (oral) cancer survivor almost 3 years in remission. Radiation was so bad---it burned his tongue, throat, neck---but it got better. It really helped us when I found a site for his type of cancer, and you could ask questions and compare experiences----and methods to cope, both physically and emotionally.

:hug:

[Flaxbee]

12. I'm sorry, Mike.

Feel free to vent - it is unfair. Though I will continue to believe the radiation will help. :hug: to you and your dad.

[graywarrior]

13. There is nothing worse than feeling helpless when one of your parents is

sick and suffering. My heart really goes out to both of you. I wish I could say things will get better, but you just never know. It took 10 chemo treatments and a multitude of radiations to beat my mother's cancer and she was ok for a while. I guess your dad needs hope and some positive encouragement right now.

[JohnnyLib2]

14. Tough, sad time.

I bet you are making him proud, and that's worth a great deal in a dad's life. :pals:

[Haole Girl]

15. It is depressing when there doesn't seem to be any good news

I hope your father will have some bit of good news, someday soon, with all the treatments they may try for him. :hug:

[Dystopian]

16. Mike...

Reading your words....my heart goes out to you. I know his sadness is yours.
I'm sorry you have a heavy heart. :hug:
Hopefully things will turn around.
You and your family are in my thoughts.....
Wishing you peace of mind....

peace~

[femmocrat]

17. Sorry, Mike. Sending some vibes to you and your dad.

:hug:

[Writer]

18. Mike, first I want to say how sorry I am to read this.

It must be hard for you to watch your father go through this...

but maybe there's something you can do to help. I know he can't read with his eyes, but can he with his ears? Perhaps some books on CD would be good for him to listen to as he goes through this difficult time.

Hugs for the both of you.

:hug:

~Writer~

[applegrove]

19. So sorry.

[Jack Sprat]

20. I know it may not help, but I've been there.

I guess most of us have with some relation. It is very hard. It's a hard and cruel sickness. If you need advice or support, this is a good place to find it. Best to your Dad, yourself, and family.

[Wetzelbill]

21. Sorry to hear that

I know it's tough, but you're among friends, feel free to get your feelings out as much as possible, many of us have been there and we understand. You and your father are in my thoughts and I sent some good vibes your way. :hug:

[InvisibleTouch]

22. I can't imagine what I'd do without being able to read either.

So I can relate. But it might help and might give him something to immerse himself in, if you bring him a nice selection of books on tape/CD. Most libraries have a good selection these days. It's not the same as reading for yourself, but it can be equally engaging. And rather than having someone read to him, an audio book still gives your dad control over the process of "reading."

[Critters2]

23. So sorry, Mike.

I remember the struggle with my mom's cancer. I'm sorry you're going through it. :hug:

[blonndee]

24. I'm so sorry, Mike.

It must be frustrating not being able to stop this. This might be a stupid question, but might he be interested in being read to, or audio books? I know the latter wouldn't be the same as keeping up on current events and such, but...anyway, I'm sorry. I hope he feels better soon.

[chknltl]

25. I can't help your dad of course but......

...perhaps I may have a way to lift your spirits a little. I find that doing random acts of kindness for others gives me a little 'lift' inside and sometimes that little lift is what my spirit needs. No, it never alters any harsh realities I may be facing but it seems to help my mood a little. Here are two examples:

Today I was 'accosted' by Girl Scouts and their mothers who had posted themselves outside of my local grocery store. It turns out that there is a Girl Scout fundraiser going on all over my town right now. Many folks just avert their eyes and walk right by, others come up with some apology and a precious few do stop to purchase the cookies. I have no interest in their cookies but I took some joy in listening to what the money collected was to be used for. I told them I thought this was a good cause and one should support the Scouts and if I could, would they just let me donate $10. Then I went out of my way to drive to two more stores and donated $10 to the Girl Scouts at those stores too.

Had I just purchased the cookies from the Girl Scouts instead, the feeling would not have been the same at all,(and I would have wound up with boxes of cookies I have no desire in eating anyway). My simple $10 donation purchased something for me much more important than their cookies. It wasn't much, I wish I could have donated more but it made me feel good to see those little girls smile and that good feeling has stayed with me throughout the day.

Another random 'feelgood' that I do is I go to the local 'Dollar Store' and purchase 20 umbrellas. These I store in a basket in my truck. On rainy days when I am out-n-about, I adjust my route to match the ones the buses travel. When I see someone gettin' rained on at a bus-stop I pull over and hand them one of the umbrellas.

I know, it sounds silly but it lifts my spirits to do random nice stuff for others like this. Truth be told, happiness is important to my life and in the case of the umbrellas, I can think of nothing I could spend $20 on that would make me feel any happier! Another-words my random acts of kindness are even more special for me than they are for the beneficiaries.

I know it sounds like an odd suggestion at this time but perhaps you may find that inventing your own random act of kindness for others will be uplifting for you as well. It can not do anything for your ailing father of course but it might do the trick for making you feel just a little better. If-so it could be money well spent! Good luck to you and your pop.
:hug:

(PS sometimes the Karma builds up and from out of nowhere that good Karma gets returned. In my case, when I truly needed it, a GREAT DUer, unasked, helped me out financially!)

[Aristus]

26. I'm sorry, Mike. You have every right to feel awful.

Prayers and good wishes for your father. God bless...

[KitchenWitch]

27. Maybe you could get him some audio books in subjects he has interest in?

:hug:

I am sorry things are difficult right now.

[lost-in-nj]

28. sorry I'm late to post

but


:hug:


it is very frustrating.......


I know


hope your better today


lost