Totally real and true and possibly somewhat amusing Skype conversation.

[redqueen]

http://thezimp.mindofchester.com/?p=492





my friend from high school posted a great true convo between him and a skype spammer





I get a lot of stupid Skype spammers who want to be my friend. I reply to all of them, today, one of them replied back. Here’s the resulting conversation.

<6:02:35 PM> portiatee: hello hw are u doing

<6:03:06 PM> Anthony Imperioli: fucking awesome ytou?

<6:03:32 PM> portiatee: what…………………./

<6:03:48 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i said i’m awesome, and you?

<6:04:48 PM> portiatee: am portia from Ghana

<6:04:59 PM> Anthony Imperioli: you’re a real person?

<6:05:23 PM> portiatee: wht do u mean

<6:05:33 PM> portiatee: can a gost type

<6:06:09 PM> Anthony Imperioli: hahahah

<6:06:13 PM> Anthony Imperioli: man, you’re funny

<6:06:23 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i think i like you

<6:06:37 PM> portiatee: ok thank u

<6:07:29 PM> Anthony Imperioli: how did you find me?

<6:08:10 PM> portiatee: i was searching for people and i came abt to find u

<6:08:34 PM> Anthony Imperioli: how come you messaged me? want to be friends?

<6:08:53 PM> portiatee: yup

<6:10:03 PM> Anthony Imperioli: awesome!!!! are you a guy girl? how old are you?!?

<6:10:22 PM> portiatee: am a girl 19

<6:11:07 PM> Anthony Imperioli: wwwwhhoaa!! girls!! i like girls!!

<6:11:22 PM> portiatee: ok

<6:11:35 PM> portiatee: nice to meet u

<6:11:39 PM> Anthony Imperioli: nice to meet you toooo

<6:11:44 PM> portiatee: where do u com,e from

<6:11:51 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’m from canada

<6:12:00 PM> portiatee: ok

<6:12:17 PM> portiatee: what don u do for living

<6:12:42 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i own my own business as well as have a clothing line

<6:12:48 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i also produce films and videos

<6:13:05 PM> portiatee: ok am a student plz

<6:13:11 PM> portiatee: Hello! Please add me to your Contact list.

<6:13:51 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i don’t know you well enough

<6:14:06 PM> Anthony Imperioli: where you from?

<6:14:20 PM> portiatee: i will descbrie myself to ok plz

<6:15:18 PM> portiatee: am portiatee as my nick name

<6:15:22 PM> portiatee: am from ghana

<6:15:38 PM> portiatee: we were born 4 from our parents

<6:15:48 PM> portiatee: 2 boys and 2 girls

<6:16:14 PM> portiatee: but unfortunately for me my father died long ago

<6:16:25 PM> portiatee: and my mum is in the village

<6:17:04 PM> portiatee: as at now \m, staing with my uncle but he does not like me at all

<6:17:17 PM> portiatee: since he dont like paying my fees

<6:17:56 PM> Anthony Imperioli: you need money?

<6:18:47 PM> portiatee: if u give me i will collect since i need it to pay my fes pl

<6:19:10 PM> Anthony Imperioli: well, money is not an issue for me, as you see i’m extremely rich

<6:19:23 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i don’t mind donating at all… but… i have to ask a favor

<6:19:27 PM> portiatee: ok plz

<6:19:43 PM> Anthony Imperioli: can we keep this between us?

<6:19:52 PM> portiatee: yes plz

<6:20:59 PM> Anthony Imperioli: see, you’re an attractive young lady, right, and i’m an attractive rich entrepreneur that has lots of money… but i never have time to settle down and do the things that I want to do cause I’m always so busy buying things with the large amounts of money i have…

<6:23:17 PM> portiatee: ok so as we are now together when will u get me some amout of money so tht i use for myself since i have no money plz

<6:24:36 PM> Anthony Imperioli: no no

<6:24:40 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i dont want to get together with you

<6:25:02 PM> portiatee: why dont you like me plz

<6:25:08 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i have too many women in my life

<6:25:12 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i have to ask you something else

<6:25:28 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’ll give you $1,000,000 if you do this for me

<6:25:38 PM> portiatee: ok plz

<6:25:43 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i really really really LOVE women’s feet

<6:25:53 PM> Anthony Imperioli: especially toes

<6:26:47 PM> portiatee: i will do but hw do u get it plz

<6:27:24 PM> portiatee: so that i give u

<6:27:43 PM> Anthony Imperioli: okay, i love women’s toes so much… i… want to get toes transplanted on my feet

<6:28:04 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’ll give you $1,000,000 per toe, if you donate your toes to me

<6:28:11 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i can give you mine after, so you won’t be toeless

<6:28:21 PM> portiatee: i will

<6:28:29 PM> Anthony Imperioli: you’ll give me your toes?!?

<6:28:31 PM> Anthony Imperioli: really?!?!

<6:28:34 PM> Anthony Imperioli: how many of them?!?!

<6:28:38 PM> portiatee: yes

<6:28:49 PM> Anthony Imperioli: How many of your toes will you give me?

<6:28:59 PM> portiatee: two

<6:29:04 PM> Anthony Imperioli: 2?!?!?

<6:29:06 PM> Anthony Imperioli: amazing!!!

<6:29:14 PM> Anthony Imperioli: okay, that’s 2 million dollars!!!

<6:29:19 PM> Anthony Imperioli: which toes?!? the big toe?!?

<6:29:22 PM> portiatee: ok

<6:29:24 PM> Anthony Imperioli: on both sides?

<6:29:34 PM> portiatee: yes

<6:29:40 PM> Anthony Imperioli: okay, two big toes!!

<6:30:01 PM> portiatee: am ready to give to u but hw do get them

<6:30:11 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’ll take care of that

<6:30:27 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i own an organ distribution company that distributes organs and limbs overseas

<6:30:41 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’m so excited!! my dream is coming true!!!

<6:31:11 PM> portiatee: ok do u want me to cut and send to u or what………………?

<6:31:34 PM> Anthony Imperioli: yes

<6:31:38 PM> Anthony Imperioli: whats your address?

<6:32:58 PM> portiatee: BOAKYE MICHAEL KWABENA SUNYANI SENIOR HIGH P.O BOX 156 SUNYANI GHANA

<6:33:08 PM> Anthony Imperioli: Okay

<6:33:12 PM> Anthony Imperioli: excellent

<6:33:18 PM> portiatee: OK

<6:33:20 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’ll send a surgeon over there immediately to cut off your toes

<6:33:36 PM> Anthony Imperioli: once i have confirmation your toes are dismembered, i’ll send the 2 million

<6:34:23 PM> portiatee: SEND B4 COS IT IS NOT EASY A FRIEND CHEATED ME AND I DONT WANT THAT TO HAPPEN AGAIN

<6:34:38 PM> *** Missed call from portiatee. ***

<6:35:04 PM> *** Call ended ***

<6:35:35 PM> Anthony Imperioli: dont call me

<6:35:40 PM> portiatee: OK

<6:35:46 PM> Anthony Imperioli: there’s people in the room and i dont want them to hear what i’m talking about

<6:36:20 PM> portiatee: ok then send tomorow

<6:36:26 PM> Anthony Imperioli: you know what… i’ll cut off my toes first

<6:36:29 PM> Anthony Imperioli: to show that i’m serious

<6:36:52 PM> portiatee: no no send the money

<6:37:01 PM> Anthony Imperioli: no, i’m committed to this

<6:37:10 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i’ll cut off my toes, send my toes AND the money together

<6:37:18 PM> portiatee: u are not serious ok

<6:37:25 PM> portiatee: i dont want that plz

<6:37:39 PM> portiatee: this is a deal ok

<6:37:43 PM> Anthony Imperioli: it’s ok, i have professional surgeons

<6:38:02 PM> Anthony Imperioli: you’ll have my toes and the money and my surgeons will replace your toes with my toes and send me your toes

<6:38:10 PM> Anthony Imperioli: so i can finally have the female toes i’ve been dreaming about

<6:38:16 PM> portiatee: there are so many in ghana here so dont worry urself

<6:38:24 PM> Anthony Imperioli: so many what?

<6:38:28 PM> portiatee: urs is to send the money

<6:38:52 PM> portiatee: and give ur address i will post them to u ok

<6:39:13 PM> Anthony Imperioli: okay, so you want money, but you don’t want to give me your toes?

<6:39:30 PM> portiatee: yes send the money

<6:39:39 PM> Anthony Imperioli: okay… let’s make ANOTHER deal then

<6:39:46 PM> portiatee: ok

<6:39:53 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i really really really love goats

<6:39:58 PM> Anthony Imperioli: i love female goats

<6:40:00 PM> Anthony Imperioli: so much

<6:40:10 PM> Anthony Imperioli: can you, stick your foot in a goat’s vagina, take a picture, send it to me, and the $2 million is YOURS!!

<6:41:23 PM> Anthony Imperioli: HELLLO?!?!?!

<6:45:46 PM> Anthony Imperioli: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOO?!?!?