Dumbest thing you've ever overheard?

[arbusto_baboso]

A post on another thread reminded me of this.

Years ago, in the early 80s when I was in college, I was riding the bus to campus and overheard the following conversation between two sorority-type girls:

Girl 1: "See any movies lately?"

Girl 2 : "No. But I want to see that one... Barfly" (she pronounced it 'barf-lee')

I slapped my forehead with that one.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

1. From my mother...

While giving me a lecture on smoking...

Mom: "Your grandfather died from lung cancer and stepdad's parents have emphysema. It runs in the family."

Me: "Mom, I'm not related to his parents."

Or, me, my mom and LostinVA are talking about something and my (not senile) aunt blurts out, "I love the Blessed Mother."

:wtf:

[Midlodemocrat]

2. In college, one of my dorm mates walked in while I was typing

a paper and said "Who's typing?"

A serious :wtf: moment.

[jeff30997]

16. OMG ! Lol!

:spray: And what was your answer ? :rofl:

[Midlodemocrat]

25. Honestly?

I wheeled around and said "Holy Shit!!!! I want to know, too."

:rofl:

[jeff30997]

26. ROFL

Stop it ! You're killing me! :rofl:

[meegbear]

3. My mother to me after I had gotten majorly stoned ...

"Are you taking pot?"

I said no - and couldn't believe I didn't burst out laughing.

[cwydro]

4. In Key West

when I was pedaling a Pedi-cab one summer, two tourist in my cab and one says to the other,
"I wonder if the water goes all the way around the island."

[mitchum]

6. I love that one!

[cwydro]

8. Oh, I have a list of stupid tourist quotes.

There are several cigar stores in Key West in the tourist section. A friend of mine worked in one and sold some cigars to some peeps off a cruise ship.

They asked if they would have to declare the cigars when they returned to the US.:P

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

11. My mom thought my sisters could drink in Hawaii because it was an island

They were all underage at the time.

Mom: "You girls can drink there."
Me: "No, they can't."
Mom: "Why not, it's an island?"
Me: "It's a state."
Mom: "But it's an island."

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

[cwydro]

14. Lol!

Exactly what we deal with!

[SacredCow]

13. Even I was annoyed by the tourists in Key West....

My partner were advised to avoid the Mallory Square sunset celebration like the plague. As I recall, it was described as, "Straight Obnoxious Tourist HELL!" :rofl:

[cwydro]

15. Yeah, but Mallory is still fun!

Just walk with a margarita and you fit right in.

[SacredCow]

18. I hear that the "cat guy" is pretty interesting....

but the only sunset thing we did was a (gay) cruise...

LOVE your town, though.... :hi:

[arbusto_baboso]

19. !!!!!

:wtf:

[LynneSin]

5. "I voted for George W. Bush TWICE!!!"

:eyes:

[jeff30997]

27. Yes dear we all know that.

And that's why your avatar represents a twisted blue dunce cap. :P

[madinmaryland]

35. I'm sure you did FReeper.

:wtf:

[Javaman]

7. from someone that was missing a few cards...

"where do I go to get video tapes developed?"

this was only a few years ago.

[SacredCow]

9. My junior year of HS (1987 to 1988)....

Girl 1: What are you listening to?

Girl 2 (with a Walkman): This really cool new band- The Doors

:eyes:

[CreekDog]

10. "If you wear tight underwear, you'll turn (word for gay)"

"I didn't say quitting smoking causes cancer, I just mean that the smoking keeps the cancer down" :wtf:

both of these gems from my step-grandmother, or as my aunt calls her, "the red dot in the blue state (New Jersey)"

[arbusto_baboso]

21. Aren't you glad she's not a blood relative?

I know I would be.

[mcctatas]

12. "Is Milwaukee on a big lake or something...

there seem to be an awful lot of sailors downtown"


*oops, overheard, that was actually a question I asked in HS, I always did suck at the geography* :banghead:

[Deep13]

17. When I first moved to Cleveland *shutter* I moved into the Cleve. State dorms.

I had overheard a student who had been there for a while realize aload for the first time that the big blue thing half a mile north was Lake Erie.

[AlCzervik]

20. "She was so skinny she looked emancipated"

that was said to me by my husband, i almost died laughing.

[arbusto_baboso]

22. NICE!

[Orrex]

29. A great nod to Lincoln's famous Emaciation Proclamation

[AlCzervik]

31. i mentioned Lincoln after i wiped away the tears and blew my nose.

My husband is the king of using words out of context or mispronouncing them.

[fizzgig]

23. i heard this in a parking lot a few years back

the girl looked maybe 19 or 20 and she was talking on her cell phone. "she just cheated on him, it's not like she did anything wrong."

[LNM]

24. The Titanic sinks? That ruined the movie.

I didn't hear it personally, just heard it floating on the internets.

[WildEyedLiberal]

28. Some hipster was opining about the "degenerate degeneracy of societal ethos"

This was at my university town's local philosophy-grad-student-slacker-intelligentsia coffee bar, so no real surprise, but I didn't think such vapidly pretentious douchery existed in real life.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

33. I once had a student I was flunking -

he never did one assignment in a very easy class (college) - call me "an eclectic motherfucker."

No, I don't know what it meant, either..................

[RoadRage]

30. "That Sarah Palin is just downright Brilliant, isn't she"?

Said by my God-Fearing Bible Thumping Mother-in-law the day after she jumped into the race.

[CreekDog]

32. After being introduced to someone's sister (a nun): "I knew you guys had money, but your own nun?"

:wtf:

sadly, that was me. :hide:

(note to self: a person may be simultaneously someone's sister AND a sister :think:)

[madinmaryland]

36. Uhmmmm.

:wtf: creekdog?

[CreekDog]

37. i'm a little slow

:shrug: :rofl:

[Tangerine LaBamba]

34. At a table behind me,

in a restaurant in - of course - Dallas:

First woman (very young): "I think he'll make me a great first husband."

Second woman (also very young): "But he used to be your stepfather."

[Auggie]

38. In high school, a teacher made a student write a report on the iron curtain...

he wanted to know when it was built and how many tons of steel it required. The student came in next week with the answers.

Cruel joke by the teacher, in retrospect. And by us for not cluing this idiot in. But we were teenagers -- what did we know about morals?