So I had Jury Duty today and it sucked

[LynneSin]

They had 54 cases but only needed jury for 2 of them and I wasn't picked.

I felt like the loser that no one wanted on their dodgeball team

:cry:

What's worse, we were done at noon and I felt it was only right to go back into work.

[HopeHoops]

1. You can get out of it right away with a simple T-Shirt (make it yourself)

"Hang 'em, Fry 'em, Inject 'em - They're ALL guilty!"

They'll give you a pass.

[NightWatcher]

2. I like jury duty. if I were arrested, I'd want me on my jury

do you want your fate decided by people who tried and failed to get out of jury duty?

[LynneSin]

4. But here's the thing - I try to do my best to NOT get arrested

:D

[HopeHoops]

6. Officer Obey said, "I'm gonna put you in the cell, kid. I'll need your wallet and your belt."

I said, "Obey, I can understand why you want my wallet so I won't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for?"

He said, "We don't want any hangin's."

[phasma ex machina]

9. Yet another gambit

[TheMightyFavog]

3. I was on a jury once.

A kid (who had been in the local paper recently for earning his Eagle rank) was fighting with his insurance company over the compensation he got from a dog bite. His slimeball attorney was trying to play the pain and suffering card, caliming that this kid was being called "Milk Bone" by his classmates and having dog biscuits thrown at him. I felt that this was so much bullshit that I damn near busted out laughing in the jury box.

Bastard broke my personal bullshit detector.

[derby378]

5. I served on a federal petit jury

When you're called for a federal petit jury, you're on call for the entire month. Some bosses may be perplexed by the whole concept, but if you get the call, you have to show up and wait in the pool room until you're either seated or dismissed for the day.

I only participated in one criminal trial, though. The charges were possession of stolen earthmoving equipment and conspiracy to possess same. Reaching a verdict on the conspiracy charge was a little harder than the possession charge, but not that much harder.

[ChickMagic]

7. Despite the way I dressed, I was picked for a federal grand jury

For 18 months I had to be ready to spend at least 3 days each month
in either Dallas or Ft. Worth. They couldn't tell us at the first of
the month when we'd have to go because of secrecy. They called
the afternoon before we had to be there.

My insane boss (at the time) had a hissy fit. She took it to the
chairman to try to get me fired over it. Of course, that wouldn't fly.
I was lucky because if they had wanted to, our service could have been
extended by 6 months. One woman moved to Belize to get out of it.

Plus, the foreman was a real rube. She was the wife of the Sheriff in
Venus, Texas, population 1100. Here's some interesting stats:

Races in Venus:

White Non-Hispanic (76.9%)
Hispanic (13.2%)
Other Asian (5.7%)
Other race (4.5%)
Two or more races (2.9%)
American Indian (2.0%)
Black (1.5%)

There are 16 registered sex offenders (as of 2007)
Venus-area historical tornado activity is above Texas state average.
It is 251% greater than the overall U.S. average. Venus-area
historical earthquake activity is significantly above Texas state average.

Okay, so you get the idea. This foreman was soooo embarrassing. On one case, they
brought in a witness from another state. She was dressed to the nines and seemed
very professional. This foreman kept making insinuations that she was sleeping with
her boss, which even if true, had absolutely nothing to do with the case.

This happened over and over again. At one point, we had to examine helicopter
rotor mounts. The witness was there to explain to us what these hunks of metal do.
Again, there were the insinuations.

Anyway, I think I blew my chance of ever winning the lottery.

[av8rdave]

8. That happens to me every two years like clockwork.

I'll be back there in January 2011, for the 6th time.