How do you know if it's time to put your kitty down?

[GreenPartyVoter]

I guess my biggest fear is putting him down for something he could have come back from, or worse leaving him suffering too long from something that was never going to get better.

How do you know for sure? :cry:

[kimi]

1. Aw, I'm so sorry

This is such a sad dilemma, and such a sad time to deal with it.

I can't really answer your question - precisely. Not knowing your kitty, or his condition. I think it's a matter of talking with the vet honestly, and evaluating your kitty and what his quality of life is. And if he can possibly pull out of it, in the vet's professional opinion, or not, and whether it means he is suffering or not.

I feel for you, really. I went through this same dilemma earlier this year, and it's wrenching, and it's awful. My heart goes out to you.

Hugs.

[noamnety]

2. I wish I'd done it a little sooner.

I'm sure mine was suffering in the end. She had lost her appetite, I think that's the point where I should have given up.

The vet should be able to tell you if its organs are shutting down. At that point, I think it's better to put them down without keeping them suffering, rather than paying hundreds of dollars to keep them alive for your benefit for an extra month or two.

[InternalDialogue]

3. I did too much for one of my cats.

I felt guilty about it for years. I basically put him through hell for four days trying to save him, when I should have put him down to begin with and given him a dignified exit.

With his littermate sister, I told my vet to talk me through the process when she got to that point. I told the vet I was less interested in paying to keep her alive than hoping she could pass properly when it was her time. I specifically asked the vet to be honest with me about when my cat was probably ready to go. She told me she understood, and sure enough, when Ben was getting near the end, the vet was honest and starting including "end-of-life" options with me in addition to possible treatments or medications.

In the end, it was mostly Ben who let me know it was time. But I was prepped by the vet.

Be sure to tell your vet what your plans are -- let them know you don't necessarily want to spend every dollar to keep your kitty with you, or that you don't have the money to do anything. Tell them you need to be informed and feel comfortable -- let them know you want the benefit of their experience.

[TorchTheWitch]

4. a good heart to heart with the vet can help

if you have a good vet that you really trust.

It's a damn hard decision to make and an easy one to convince yourself to avoid. When the time came for my dog, he told me himself. That's exactly how it felt anyway. Looking back, I probably should have done it a bit sooner but wasn't able to look at the whole picture of his health at that time... I tended to look at each health issue separately.

There comes a time when you have to look at their over-all quality of life and make as unbiased a decision as possible if they've reached a point where there is too much suffering and there isn't anything more that can be done to relieve it.

I asked my vet before a surgical procedure if he thought that either the recovery would be too much for him or it wouldn't really improve his quality of life, and I wasn't really surprised when he said it was likely that he'd not even live through the surgery. I made my dog a promise when I got him that I'd take good care of him and be with him right at the end, and there was no way I was going to make him go through that surgery with the likelihood of my not being there when he passed during a surgery that wouldn't have helped him much at all anyway if he somehow managed to live through it and the recovery. Since he was already at the vet, and I knew myself well enough to know that it would be next to impossible for me to take that "last ride" to the vet, and making him live with his problems one more day would have constituted yet another emergency trip to the vet, I made the decision to have him put to sleep then.

They gave me lots of time to spend alone with him in a private room and did the deed while his head was in my lap with me petting him and telling him how much I loved him and would miss him, and it was all very peaceful and humane... and exactly how I hoped it would be with him going peacefully and me with him and him knowing I was there.

It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. He died peacefully with me with him and him knowing that I was and that I loved him... just as I'd promised and just as it should be for everyone.

[Faygo Kid]

5. You will know. Don't let it go too long. And hugs and kisses.

You as the "owner" will know. Check with the vet, of course. But do the right thing here; you won't regret it once the time comes.

Doesn't mean you won't miss him/her. I have had to do this with 2 dogs and 2 cats in the last 18 months, and it has been painful, to say the least.

They were all rescued. I miss them all, right now especially the Beebs, doggy who was rescued at 10 and gave us 5 great years.

That's because we said goodbye just three weeks ago. Do the right thing. You will know. And pat yourself on the back for the love you have given and accepted.

[orleans]

17. omg--what you have been through! i'm so sorry.

that is a lovely picture of a beautiful friend.

[Redstone]

6. You'll never know FOR SURE, so don't expect to. It's your responsibility as

a pet owner to make the best decision you can about whether that pet is still enjoying life or not.

I wish I could sugar-coat it for you, my friend, but I just cannot.

Redstone

[Haole Girl]

7. Well... I don't know

This is something I hope I'll never have to face, but probably will.

Guess I'd ask the veterinarian for an expert opinion & the odds of recovery from any prolonged illness.

And I would try not to let them suffer... even if I wanted to hang on.

:hug:

[emilyg]

8. When my 18 yr. old sweetie

quit eating, drinking, moving and using the box I knew it was time.

[GreenPartyVoter]

10. He's done the first 3, but is still using the box. I noticed last night tht his back end is getting

wobbly. And he hates me squirting food into his mouth. It's the only time he shows any energy, fighting the "purrito" and syringe.

I think he's telling me it's time to let him go. :cry:

[emilyg]

15. Do what needs doing. If he

has no quality of life - let him go. My heart aches for you.

[SoCalDem]

9. Having done this exactly a week ago, I'll wiegh in..

You will always wonder, but you have to make the decision and then forgive yourself..

I still wonder if I had brought him home, somehow we could have managed to balance the meds, the fluid retention, the diabetes and the cardio-myopathy.

As I held him in my lap and petted his thin, bony frame (formerly a 24.7 lb behemoth), and navigated around the tubes, and the bare patch where they withdrew fluid from his chest, he raised his head and purred for me.. For that brief moment, I thought.."Hey, we can do this", but then when I saw the xrays, and heard the vets prognosis, I knew what had to be done..

His medical ordeal cost about $700 for his 3 day stay, so the vet had no reason to stop treatment that he was being well-paid for, but he said if this was MY kitty, I would "let him go"..

So, just shy of his 8th birthday,I had to do the decent thing for my recycle-bin "diver", my ball-playing maniac, my 24 pound, vibrating "blanket", My Bubby..

We wrapped him up and buried him with a "new ball". My husband kept them in a small wicker chest, and Bubby would hook his claws into the wicker , pull open the drawer to see if there was a NEW ball for him..

Quality over quantity

You will make the right decision, and you will feel bad about it, but you have to do what you have to do :hug:

[GreenPartyVoter]

11. THANK YOU, everyone. I am going to call the vet tomorrow to have her look him over, but I think

it's probably time. :cry:

[rurallib]

12. My best wishes on your decision

we just had to do that last week. It hurts but we all know that the time comes one way or another.
Remember the good times.

[GreenPartyVoter]

13. It's so hard. I could probably keep him going with subcutaneous fluids every day, but he's starting

to fight the syringe feedings (the only time I see any energy in him whatsoever) and his back legs seem wobbly and weak now. Unless the vet has a surefire way to fix that, I am going to guess it's all a part of his natural winding down.

[kimi]

16. Go with your gut

Everyone here can give you the wisdom of their own experience, and it is wisdom indeed. In the end, do what YOU feel is right and proper.

When my Tabitha cat was nearing the end, my sweetheart of a vet proposed several ways to keep her going - and honestly, she wasn't suffering, so we went with it. It gave the boys and I, and really, the other cats, the opportunity to say good-bye for another month or so. We nursed and tended her and were rewarded with purrs and loving that we'll never forget. In the end she did leave us through the mercy of the vet, and it broke our hearts, but that time with her will always remain special.

In the long run, having a companion is an exercise in saying good-bye, IMO. Cause you're gonna have to do that sometime. It's just a matter of how and when and under what circumstances you do it.

You WILL know. And your vet will help you with the decision, and in the long run, your kitty will too.

Hugs, honey. I feel for ya.

[orleans]

18. i had to say goodbye for now to my beautiful dog last year

she needed help leaving this life and it was so terribly hard for me to do. i "knew" i had to help her--but i mentally tormented myself before and after. and although i "knew" it was the only right thing to do--it took months and months to forgive myself.

i also knew she was grateful for the relief.

truly sorry both of you are going through this.

[TorchTheWitch]

20. if it makes you feel better, it IS very peaceful and humane

I was honestly shocked by that, and made me feel a lot better about having done it. I was afraid it might be painful or otherwise terrible for him even for just a few seconds and it wasn't at ALL. In fact, when they said he was gone I wasn't sure I believed it and had to check myself... that's how peaceful it was. They really do just go to sleep and then pass on. Everyone should be able to go so easily and peacefully.

I really feel for you, dear, and it's obvious that so many others do too whether they've been through it themselves or not. Whether you decide to do it now or later know that it's the last and greatest act of love you could ever give your sweet kitty.

:hug:

[wysimdnwyg]

14. I went through this four years ago

Bali was 18 and had (that we know of) kidney disease, cancer, a heart murmur and something going on with his thyroid. Towards the end, it was really agonizing trying to decide when it was time. One day I came home to find his lower body was paralyzed and him basically dragging around the bathroom, through his own urine. Needless to say, that made the decision. Although I knew it was coming and I'm certain it was the right time, it was still VERY difficult. Just understand there are certain issues with which he can live - like the kidney disease Bali lived with for 4 years. Other issues, like his cancer, were too far progressed to make it worth while to try and treat. Once you get used to the idea that some things are treatable and others are not, it does get easier.

[Common Sense Party]

19. I don't know. I can't make that call for you. I've only done it once, just

a couple months ago. It was heart-rending. Could he have lived a while longer? Yeah, probably. Could we have extended his life with expensive medicines or treatments? I don't know; possibly.

But would he have ENJOYED his extra few weeks or months? In HIS case, I don't think so. He wasn't eating much. He was in pain. He was suffering.

He had lived a good, full life. It was hard as hell, but we had to let him go.

I miss the guy.

[spinbaby]

21. You don't know for sure

I still wonder if we did the right thing with the 19-year-old coon cat we had put down three years ago. He was still eating well, comfortable, and not dying of anything, but he was also deaf, blind, and had difficulty getting around because of a hip he had dislocated in his youth. What made us decide to do it was his mental state. Because he was so impaired, he was fearful and disoriented most of the time. We decided after a few weeks of giving him near constant attention, trying sedatives (a disaster), and having to lock him in a bathroom while we were gone because he was also incontinent (he hated it and cried). He only felt safe if we were physically holding him and was so distressed when we had to leave , that we finally made the decision to let him go. I still miss him.

[Arkansas Granny]

22. It's never an easy decision, but I did it when I thought that they were

no longer enjoying life and there was nothing I could do to improve it. It's hard, but it's sometimes the last good thing you can do for a beloved companion.

[Arkansas Granny]

23. Dupe - delete

[GreenPartyVoter]

24. UPDATE: Thank you for all your thoughtful responses. In the end

Pretzel himself told us it was time, and the vet confirmed it: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x9562505