Lemma have a "Huzzah!" for my local postal workers

[Stinky The Clown]

So, I'm in the local post office. Its late in their day, its rainy and windy and cool. No line, just one customer and me, and three postalpeople behind the counter - two women and a guy.

I had a book to mail. I walk up, hold up the envelope, and say: "This is a book. Book rate is fine".

The lady who takes the envelope feels it and says to me: "Is there anything liquid, fragile, perishable, hazardous, or controlled in here?" I give her a 'you gotta be shitting me' look. She smiles. "Silly, isn't it?" she says. We both laugh.

The guy chimes in. He holds up a little plastic covered cue card with the litany printed on it. He holds the card to his forehead and says: "We just need tape recorder implants."

We all laugh now.

I say: "Have you flown lately?" No, they both say as they shake their heads.

I say: "We're like a damned nation of suspects. You're forced to ask those silly questions. The screeners at the airport take away our toothpaste, run a wand over us, and pat us down."

They nod.

It goes quiet for a second and then I say, loudly: "BOO!"

That really got them going. The woman thought it was hysterical. She's lauging hard now. The guy's going on about all the stupid shit they have to do when accepting packages.

So I say: "It's them damned Republics. They want us all scared so we'll vote for them."

"Oh NO!" says the woman. "We're union," says the guy. The third woman is just laughing. She speaks for the first time: "There's no WAY I'll ever vote for a Republican. They **caused** 9/11 to happen."

"Where did you hear *that*?" I ask.

"On the internet. There's lots of information out there. You have the internet? I'll give you some web sites ........." And she goes on for a bit more.

The other two are rolling their eyes a little and smiling. The guy says, in a low voice: "We're not supposed to talk to customers about this kinda thing and she knows that," thumbing his hand toward her.

I start to amble away from the counter. I say to the conspiracy lady: "You're not alone thinking that."

As I'm walking away, they're still laughing. "Democrats!" I call out over my shoulder.

"That's for sure!" says the first woman.

I never did directly answer her question about the contents of my package.

[JuniperLea]

1. HUZZAH!!!!

Oh snap! Now I'll be saying "HUZZAH" alla the time! hehe

[HereSince1628]

2. sometimes the letter carrier drives letters right up to the house...

which is no big deal in town, but the house on the farm is over 800 feet from the mailbox.

[DoYouEverWonder]

3. Funny, seem the M$M

never does any Bush in the Heartland stories anymore. Seems the Heartland ain't buying his shit any more either.

Huzzah!

[Lisa]

4. the guy at my local postal outlet in Canada ...

... was required to warn everybody about the recent restrictions on mailing packaged foods to the US. Apparently the new Homeland Security laws prevent Canadians from sending "edible" commercial items to US addresses (even dog biscuits!), on the grounds that someone might try to poison people in the States, or spread some kind of bacterial infection that way. There was such a public outcry that "homemade" goods such as cakes and cookies were made exempt.

Anyway, the clerk turned to me and said, "I guess they think that terrorists can't bake." He pointed out that even if there were a credible threat, the law isn't helpful because it focuses on commercial goods like a factory-sealed can of smoked salmon, which aren't as likely to be tampered with in the first place. He added that such a law is only good for "frightening people", because it undermines trust (it's the people you know who are going to be sending you cookies etc. through the mail, not complete strangers).


p.s. the Posties (the inside and outside workers) fielded an enormous contingent for the anti-war protests before the invasion of Iraq, too.