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How would the Flying Spaghetti Monster react to the recent behavior of Bill Clinton? Would his noodly Appendage cure all that ails Bill? Would Bill even allow himself to be "touched"? Or would an angry god start a pasta war, with meatballs dropped from great heights, splattering tomato sauce like blood?
When Bill Clinton attempted to inject Jesse Jackson (code word for racist politics) into the sauce, claiming that Barack Obama's victory was tainted by the "fact" that South Carolina matters not one noodle, the pot came close to boiling over. Forget Al Dente, this really overcooked the Spag. FSM have few sins, but the ones they have are taken seriously. Overcooking is sin #3, in terms of seriousness.
Pastafarians are made up largely of tolerant, intelligent people. They reject dogma, and after the pesto vs. linguini wars, they've had no problems with radical fundamentalism.
Every Pastafarian knows that FSM is slow to come to a boil, but on those rare occasions, watch out. There is no stopping his anger.
Perhaps Hillary would be better off if she heeded some of the FSM adages and morals:
"A watched pot never boils."
(translation : Put a cork in his mouth and assign a babysitter to sit him.)
"Garlic goes great with every Pasta"
(translation : Garlic keeps evil away. Use generously)
"The higher the altitude, the more salt in the pot"
(translation : The higher the altitude, the more salt in the pot)
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