IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR THIS MAN HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY CALL YOURSELF A DEMOCRAT?!?!

[Orwellian_Ghost]

PAT PAULSEN, “DEAD” SERIOUS ABOUT 2008 CAMPAIGN
January 2nd, 2008 · 7 Comments

PRESS RELEASE

JAN-02 - LOS ANGELES, CA - Pat Paulsen, long time presidential candidate and political pundit, has managed to make headlines again, just months before this year’s U.S. presidential election. As the November 2008 election nears, a series of strange incidents involving Mr. Paulsen, or his likeness, have been reported throughout the country. Paulsen, who allegedly passed away in April 1997, was known for his many runs for the presidency.

In 1996 Paulsen placed second, behind President Bill Clinton, among the 23 candidates running in the New Hampshire Democrat Party primary election.

A former state government official in Bismarck, North Dakota, claimed to have seen Paulsen milling about the state capitol building on November 11th.

“I’m positive it was him. He was wearing a baseball cap and a torn jacket. I called out to him by name and he nodded back to me. When I turned to point him out to my wife, I looked back and he had vanished.”

Paulsen defeated candidate Ross Perot in the North Dakota primary of 1992.

Patrons of Jim’s Spaghetti House, a restaurant in Huntington, West Virginia, caused a stir when, on November 15, Pat’s image seemed to mysteriously appear in a plate of spaghetti at booth number 4. The stunned crowd was asked to stay calm while a waitress whisked away the dish and promptly replaced it with a fish sandwich. Coincidentally, the incident occurred at the same booth where John F. Kennedy dined in 1960, and where Paulsen dined 35 years later.

Attorney Ed Zelenak, counsel for the Paulsen campaign during his 1996 run, says he has experienced visitations from the longtime politician.

“He’s come to me in dreams in the past, but I’ve noted that the visitations are more frequent of late, and they seem to carry a sense of urgency,” Zelenak said.

...

http://www.paulsen.com/pat/?p=11#comments

“All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian”

- Pat Paulsen

[Dogmudgeon]

1. Paulsen can still pull this one out of the fire

Even though he's dead, he's over 35 and a natural-born American.

I think he has a very good chance, and can win over ANY GOP rival.

What say you?

--p!

[Orwellian_Ghost]

3. This I do know

I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.

- Pat Paulsen

[Orwellian_Ghost]

2. Where are all the K's and R's?

Pat Paulsen was born in a small fishing village in Washington State. Pat doesn't remember much about his early childhood - "I was too young," he explains.

[uppityperson]

4. k&r for Pat Paulson

[Orwellian_Ghost]

5. Pat's Bio of himself

Pat Paulsen - Biography

Pat Paulsen, America's favorite presidential candidate has had quite an illustrious career.

Entering school at the age of three, it was soon obvious he was an exceptional child. At eleven, Mensa confirmed his I.Q. at 205.

Enrolled in a think tank in Washington in 1941, he proceeded to crack the Japanese code which hastened the end of World War II. In gratitude, President Harry Truman awarded him the Medal of Honor.

He then pursued his interest in physics by working at the Livermore Lab and became the main architect in the development of the hydrogen bomb that assured America's supremacy in nuclear physics. He was awarded another Medal of Honor and the Nobel Prize in Physics in 1952.

As a hobby, Paulsen began to paint in his spare time and today, several of his masterpieces hang in the Louvre. His oil on canvas titled "The Races at Santa Anita" is currently valued at over five million dollars. His later works were described by art critics as "luminous plein-ar", a term only used to describe great works.

<snip>

http://www.paulsen.com/bio2.html

[awaysidetraveler]

17. Look, that was back when Libby and Truman were like Frick and Frack.

That think tank you're talking about wasn't Japanese--it was fucking Maoist.
It's a fact that might not jibe with that hippie shit you hear now,
but it mattered back then.

Whatever--you might not have the hippie instinct in you--still, I do
and I remember a time when I didn't have to explain my politics all the time.

Anyhow--even if that weren't the case--it was that same Livermore Lab that by way of one
connection to a St. Eves and another Fitzgerald led to other nuclear discoveries in the Soviet Union, which in turn led to Kim Jung Il #2's destructive nuclear and directorial debut.
Those were bad movies and bad earthquakes as well.

What the hell is wrong with you anyway?

Paulsen's supposed Louvre paintings were in fact stolen by the goddamn Nazi's,
and if you recall it was none other than Admiral Poindexter and Rumsfeld's appointments
that made poor little Paulsen's painting habit possible.

Listen cocksucker, if you're some kind of nihilistic anarchist, then you should fucking straiten right up and start walking the situationist party line!

You'll fucking end up dead otherwise, you Goddamn old fucker!

[NoPasaran]

6. Pat Paulson! The Nomentum Candidate!

[Orwellian_Ghost]

10. He's not as dead as you think

Pat Paulsen for President

He’s back, and still better than all the rest!

[AZBlue]

7. Hey! I saw that guy at a diner last night - he was eating with Elvis & Marilyn!

And I think James Dean was there too...

[Faygo Kid]

8. Official 1968 logo here

Worked with him for a time. Class act.

[Orwellian_Ghost]

9. First Presidential candidate

with a website.

Not kidding.

[Beausoir]

11. ROFL. You got me.

[Orwellian_Ghost]

13. This is serious

"If elected, I will win."

- Pat Paulsen

[pleah]

12. K&R for Pat Paulsen!

[Orwellian_Ghost]

16. Remember this?

“I will not run for President before it’s time” and his wristwatch alarm went off and he said like “Oh, it’s time!!!! I’m running for President!”.

[ursi]

14. That immigration policy statement of the American Indian is priceless ...

[Orwellian_Ghost]

15. COMING SOON…..PRIME TIME TV SPECIAL…..FALL 2008

COMING SOON…..PRIME TIME TV SPECIAL…..FALL 2008
January 23rd, 2008 · 10 Comments

‘THE ALMOST PRESIDENT’

In 1968, the landscape of our nation’s political environment was about to change dramatically. In the volatile atmosphere of that election year, during a time of political unrest and cynicism, one man emerged on the political scene and forever changed the way we look at campaign politics. Pat Paulsen, with the face of a desperate Basset Hound and the body of a lumpy toothpick, appeared as if out of nowhere.

Who was this quiet, soft-spoken son of a Norwegian immigrant, whom Hubert Humphrey angrily accused of causing his loss in the 1968 election, whom Bobby Kennedy called “ruthless”, who turned American politics on its head, and paved the way for a new generation of presidential candidates?

This is a look at the self-proclaimed “common, ordinary, simple savior of America’s destiny.” Our one hour television special offers 40 years of historical perspective, presenting candid and insightful observations from past and present political figures, news anchors, pundits, celebrities and friends.

Pat Paulsen: Was he too dumb to be elected….or too honest to be trusted?

http://www.paulsen.com/pat/?p=19#comments

[Orwellian_Ghost]

18. Kick for comedic truth