Whites who vote for Obama are “mesmerized” by his blackness or his silver tongue, or are voting out of white guilt.
Men who vote for Obama are sexist.
Blacks who vote for Obama are racist, because they’re voting on the basis of race. Blacks don’t count, because getting their votes is “running up the score”; they’re like 4th-quarter touchdown passes when you’re ahead by 30 (except that Obama’s not ahead—see below).
Women who vote for Clinton are neither sexist, nor racist, nor “running up the score,” but rather are testimonies to “empowerment” and are “voicing their frustration.”
Obama must immediately fire anyone in his campaign who says anything bad about Clinton; however, if anyone in Clinton’s campaign makes racially charged comments, Clinton may merely “disagree” with that person.
Obama must both renounce and reject any black person who praises him, no matter the connection to his campaign. Clinton, however, need not renounce and reject what any woman or white person says about Obama, because “that’s not really the same thing.”
Only big states count in the primary, because, as Stephen Colbert says, “we all know that whoever wins the big states in the primary automatically wins them in the general election.”
EXCEPTION: every big state counts except Illinois, because that’s Obama’s home state. Clinton was born there, but that doesn’t matter.
New York, on the other hand, does count, even though it’s Clinton’s home state.
Red states don’t count, except Texas, because Hillary won the Texas primary. Obama won the Texas caucus, and thus more Texas delegates overall, but caucuses don’t count.
Small states don’t count either, especially red ones (see above) and ones with lots of blacks (see above), and Hawaii especially doesn’t count, because Obama was born there; Clinton was born in Illinois, but it doesn’t count (see above).
Florida and Michigan didn’t count, at least at the beginning, because they violated party rules, and all candidates agreed, but now that seating the delegates would be an advantage for Clinton, they do count.
When you take away all the red states, small states, states with lots of blacks (unless they’re big and blue states (and not Illinois)) and add Florida and Michigan, Clinton is ahead.
But really, none of the states count, because the superdelegates should select a nominee based not on the most delegates but rather “experience.” Clinton has a “lifetime of experience,” unlike Obama, whose lifetime doesn’t count. The primary examples of Clinton’s experience, however—the Iraq War vote, the botched Health Care initiative, and the train wreck of a campaign—don’t count.
All things considered, it seems clear that Obama should withdraw immediately.
http://iwillwalkaway.blogspot.com
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