Obama Converts to Judaism

[peoli]

"Bold Attempt to Settle Religion Issue

Buffeted by criticism of his controversial Christian pastor while continuing to quell rumors that he is a Muslim, Sen. Barack Obama (D-Ill) took a bold step today to settle questions about his religious faith once and for all.

“I am converting to Judaism, effective immediately,” Mr. Obama told reporters at a press conference in Scarsdale, New York, adding that he would change his middle name from “Hussein” to “Murray.”

As a sign of commitment to his new faith, the Illinois Senator said that he anticipated being Bar Mitzvahed sometime between now and the crucial Pennsylvania primary and that he would no longer campaign on Saturdays.

In a subtle sign of the shift in his religious affiliation, Mr. Obama’s signature catchphrase “Yes, we can,” was nowhere to be found in his speech, replaced instead by “L’Chaim.”

While some political observers praised Mr. Obama’s conversion to Judaism as a shrewd tactic to put the issue of his religious identity to rest, the move raised the ire of one of his harshest critics, former Rep. Geradline Ferraro.

“Barack Murray Obama wouldn’t be in the position he’s in if he wasn’t Jewish,” said Ms. Ferraro to herself."

http://borowitzreport.com/

[Fredda Weinberg]

1. He'd be Barry Obama again! n/t

[eileen_d]

2. Our first Jewish President!

:rofl:

[LARED]

3. Barack Obamaberg has a nice ring to it -nt

[Lost-in-FL]

9. ...

:spray:

[rockymountaindem]

12. Clearly it would be Obamawitz n/t

[davidinalameda]

4. LOL

:rofl:

[Faygo Kid]

5. Oy vey.

At least he's a mensch.

[Cirque du So-What]

8. You say mensch...

I say übermensch.

[Thurston Howell III]

6. But now the wingers are going to say that he's a part of the Jewish conspiracy.

:rofl:

[SunsetDreams]

7. LOL

[MNDemNY]

10. That late in life circumcision is a bitch!

[Recursion]

13. Oh God... don't bring up circumcision on DU

If you think GDP is bad...

[eridani]

18. Don't you say the B word you sexist pig? n/t

[Guava Jelly]

11. Oi bama

:rofl:

[emilyg]

14. Sammy Davis lives.

[here_is_to_hope]

15. "Error: You've already recommended that thread."...dammit!

[JerseygirlCT]

16. That's great. I'm saving it to send to my family

they'll get a kick out of it.

[pnorman]

17. This entire thread has GOT to be the FUNNIEST damn thread I've seen on DU in a loooong time!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Otherwise, "n/t"

pnorman