My teenage son was confronted on a golf course yesterday over his Obama shirt

[Coexist]

My older son is 15 (nearly 16). He was walking home from his friends house, and cut across a golf course path. He told me a 40-50 year old white man saw his shirt and walked over to confront him. He asked him, "why do you support Obama, what has he ever done."

This pisses me off, because it reminds me of the popular ambush-an-Obama-supporter-and-demand-they-give-details-on-him crap that was so popular a few months back (my thoughts on that are here.)

"What did you say?", I asked him.

"I told him he is the only one who wants any type of real change, that he can work with everybody, not just certain people in his own party."

"That was good", I said.

He confessed he was so surprised and rattled, he couldn't think of anything to say, offhand (and mind you, he knows a lot about what Obama is for/has done.) He told me that then the man said that "McCain is a better person for the job" with no elaboration as to why.

"Oh, please, you don't even know what he stands for, because he has changed his mind every time he opens his mouth, so he can get votes from people who don't agree with him - he is a different man than he was 4 years ago."

Can you feel my pride?!

Then the pissed off man said something weird, he said, "You're only voting for Obama because he's black."

Whaaa???

My son is very multi-racial; black, brown and white - he is Polish, Italian, Puerto Rican, Swedish, Scottish, African and Mayan. He looks sorta' Puerto Rican but with lighter skin. He self-identifies with whatever group he is with, I think. But my second husband is all German and I look mostly Polish, with light brown hair and eyes, so we look pretty white.

"What did you say to him?", I am dying to know what my baby thinks of this obnoxious statement? What he thinks the man is saying...

"I said, oh sure, all the white kids from the suburbs automatically want a black President - that was a stupid thing to say, Mister."

Now, I wish it had been minus the insult, but I thought it was an interesting comeback from a very charged statement. The guy shut up after that.

I am convinced the man thought my son was either black or hispanic and my son's answer confused him into silence. I don't know - what do you think?


(on another note re: my son's looks - when I was chaperoning a dance once - another mother came up to me and said, "keep your eye on that one over there, he looks like trouble." It was my son. "Why" I asked her. "Just look at him", she said.

He was standing near a table with some friends just chatting. He was wearing a basketball (sleeveless) shirt and long shorts combo, and he was wearing a gold chain his Dad had just given him for his birthday, he was skinny at that time, and only 11 years old. I was so angry - he looked like an almost-teen trying to fit in to me. Not menacing. He is actually very, very shy.

I never told her he was my son, I let her find that out for herself later that night.)

Anyway - your thoughts?

[YOY]

1. I think you've got a good kid.

and I think you should let him know that. I hope my little girl can tell off adults properly in such a manner that I never had the gall to until I was old enough to be seen as one.

[ClayZ]

2. I think you should tell your son

that I think he sounds like a GREAT kid! Thank him for speaking up and supporting the best candidate!


K and R

[Coexist]

7. he is a great kid, and I tell him often.

thanks for agreeing!

[WillYourVoteBCounted]

57. you did good with him, and hopefully more kids will be like him

maybe our new generation will teach the old one some new good things.

Your son was very tactful and gracious and effective (I am guessing).

[ClayZ]

25. My grandson is 16. I know of what I speak...

We took him to drivers ed yesterday. Yikes (It seems like 16 years went by quickly this time)

His sister is 14. I know what good kids are doing these days, old as I am.....

I like that I can always find them with their cell phones.

Kendra plans to become a Doctor. She is an honor student so far. Justin wants to be a firefighter. He has already taken summer fire science classes. He will be a part time skate boarder) :-) Both have marched with us at anti-war rallies and written to tell of it at school.

Keep up the GOOD work! Thanks for telling us your son's Obama Shirt story. I got a "DeadHeads for Obama" shirt for my husband. He is wearing it to the market today.

[Coexist]

30. I love cell phones for that very reason

when I think of how my parents were never able to just call me and make sure I could answer the phone late on a weekend night, or when I was at a concert - I think I would go crazy.

If FL, you get your permit when you are 15 and your license (if you pass) a year after you get your permit.

I like that they drive w/supervision for a year before they can drive on their own, but my sister in NY thinks its insane.

I already have one driving, and as scary as it is at first, it comes in handy with three kids!

BTW, I love the Deadheads for Obama logo.

[roguevalley]

60. hug your son. he did just right. he was more respectful than most and

gave his point just fine. that woman who talked to you is an asshole. if you ever see them again, tell them rv in alaska thinks she's an asshole.

[Schema Thing]

3. I think you should find that woman from the dance

and steal her hubcaps.

[Coexist]

6. rofl.

She, after first avoiding me, was syrupy sweet for quite awhile.

[ClayZ]

28. ....and sugar in the gas tank!

:evilgrin:

[jobycom]

4. Smart kid. Handled it well. You should be proud. My daughter's been attacked for Clinton

a few times, on her web page. People give her the same crap, about Clinton being a liar, and not needing any more Clintons. But she doesn't get confronted to her face like that. As a parent, that would make me quite nervous. Your son handled it very well.

[Coexist]

8. Good for your daughter.

My son is 6 feet tall now, and works out 6x week for football - so I know he can at least out run a golfer!

[jobycom]

34. LOL! My proud daughter moment

Came early this school year, and not completely political. One of her best friends told her stepmother that she (the friend) was bisexual. So my daughter was chatting online with this friend when her mother jumped on, and accused my daughter and her other friends of corrupting her child. (My daughter is known for being anti-drug, anti-drunk, and pretty even-keeled, even though she dresses "rocker"--you know the terms, eh?)

The other friends scattered, but mine stayed on. "Why is she corrupted just because she's bi?" The mother started saying it was wrong, and her daughter really wasn't bi (she's probably right about that point), but her friends tricked her into believing it. My daughter: "None of us even knew she was bi until you just told us. And I'm not bi. So how did we convince her to be?" Stepmom said some more stuff about how sweet her daughter is (She's the wildest one of the bunch, and I know this from the kids, not the parents), and how she wouldn't be like this if it weren't for her friends. Again, my daughter: "Why is being bi bad? You should be proud of who she is."

Stepmom launches into a religious explanation of why it's wrong. My daughter: "I'm an atheist. You should love our daughter for who she is, not hate her because of some religion." (I'd rather her not pick religious fights like that, but she's still a bit fiesty.)

So stepmom explains to my daughter that she will burn in Hell for being so evil--again I want to repeat that the friend is into drugs, sex (she was not quite fifteen at the time, though she looks twenty), and anything else she can find, and is far wilder than most of her friends, especially my daughter.

My daughter stays mostly calm, and mostly respectful, but there is some banter at this point, until finally stepmom says "What if I tell your parents about all of this? That you are an atheist, that you have no respect for your elders?" I'm paraphrasing, but the tone was very much like a bully threatening a younger kid, more than a parent talking to another's teenager.

My daughter answered: "They'd be very proud of me."

"Well, I'll just tell your mother and see."

My daughter: "Tell her. She's standing right behind me, reading this over my shoulder." (Her mother and I don't live together, but we have similar views on things. She had walked in just about the time the exchange started, and was every bit as proud as me.)

After this, the stepmother vanished.

Like you, I wasn't exactly happy that my daughter had spoken like that to another parent, and lectured her on it, but her responses were more polite than what she received. And I was proud of her confidence, and her views.

[Coexist]

41. very nice story

good on your daughter.

[eridani]

65. The kids will be alright

Lots of evidence for that in this thread.

[EmperorHasNoClothes]

5. Sounds like your son is more mature than that 40-50 year old

Honestly, where does a guy like that get off trying to scold a teenager he doesn't even know.

Just the typical sense of entitlement, I guess.

[Hepburn]

9. Good for your kiddo....and congrats on raising a great son!

Mega sucks when a 40-50 year-old man has to pick on a teenager to make a point. Why the hell would a "real" adult have to verbally beat up on a kid? Unreal....

[Catherine Vincent]

10. That's the typical republican white male for ya.

He thinks he has the right to approach someone and ask them why they are voting for a certain person. It's like he can't believe whites want to vote for Barack and I'm sure if this was a black kid, he wouldn't have approached him like that.

[goldcanyonaz]

23. Don't be so sure about that. I had 3 black males ask me how I could be black and support Clinton.

The conversation became a bit heated after one of them called me a sellout. They also told me that we're not ready for a woman President and that I better get on the side that's winning if I knew what was good for me and my people. I was left shaken and very saddened by this exchange, but my vote is mine and no one can take that away from me.

[DemBones DemBones]

44. It's always about the penis, isn't it? If you don't have one, how could

you possibly be president?

Step back, little lady, and let somebody with a johnson step ahead.

:grr:

[iiibbb]

35. That's probably unfair

My dad is a republican male, and would never do that to someone. I know a lot of republicans. It is not "typical".

Most republicans I know are Republicans for idealogical reasons that have more to do with the role of gov't redistributing wealth first; they like small gov't. Although I'm not a republican, I'm a skeptic of gov't programs myself. I know some republicans who are such for the asinine reasons of gay marriage and abortion.

The problem is people who are labeling themselves as republicans these days aren't even close anymore. I'm all for self reliance, but fat lot of good that'll do me if our economy crashes.


Needless to say, I will vote Obama or Clinton because the war is a bad thing. We need to fight terror, but the war was the wrong answer for the wrong reasons and it's pulling our economy down. If anything I don't want the Republicans to ever think they can foist a administration like this one on us ever again. They need to lose, and lose big so they get what sense they had back.

[Catherine Vincent]

37. Okay, well he's your typical staunch republican white male. nt

[knixphan]

49. You can always get a copy of 'Screwed'

and accidentally leave it on dad's coffee table...

[BattyDem]

11. You've got a great son!

:hi:

The man sounds like the typical, cynical voter who doesn't "get" Obama's appeal or message. He doesn't understand how anyone could be inspired by a politician or actually have hope that things will change. I found it interesting that he demanded some specifics about Obama's accomplishments, yet offered no reason why McCain is "better for the job."

His silence may have been confusion, but it could have also been embarrassment. Your teenage son was obviously more well-informed and had given far more thought to his choice of candidate than the man did. When someone resorts to, "You're only voting for Obama because he's black" it's pretty obvious that they've got nothing intelligent to say, either against Obama or in favor of McCain. The fact that your son pointed out his stupidity probably made him feel even worse, LOL!

[Coexist]

22. you have all been really nice

I'm think I'll show him all your responses. He will be embarassed but happy.

[ORDem]

12. You're clearly a great Mom!

Your son is very lucky to have such an open-minded, encouraging parent. Bravo!!

:dem:

[Voice for Peace]

39. Here's one more to add.. kids like that are the hope of the world.

Kids who think for themselves and aren't intimidated by stupidity, no matter what age it is.

[dmr]

64. So very true, and

I am so heartened by seeing so very many out there not only registering to vote, but are knowledgeable about the issues and willing to work on the campaigns.

[Vinca]

13. You've got a great kid. Did that other mother apologize to you? nt

[Coexist]

17. no, she avoided me for a couple days

then was SUPER! sweet to me for a long time - she never mentioned it, and I let her sweat.

[Asgaya Dihi]

14. Smart kid

Telling the guy it was stupid might not have been the most polite thing, but, it was a damned stupid thing to say. All things considered I'd rather a good kid who is a bit too open and honest at times than one who just says what they think you want to hear. He can learn to play politics later if he needs to but he's off to a good start to be a decent person it seems.

[K Gardner]

15. You have much to be proud of in your son ! K&R

[TahitiNut]

16. Only one point where I disagree.

"... that was a stupid thing to say, Mister" is NOT an insult. It very clearly expresses an opinion of WHAT was said and not WHO said it. If your son had said "you're stupid for saying that" or, less directly, "only stupid people say things like that" then those would be insults.

It's clear that we're accustomed to taking umbrage (offense) when folks dismiss/demean WHAT we say, since most of us attach our egos/self-esteem to both our opinions and our actions. That attachment, however, is easily abandoned when, as we ALL do, we screw up royally. The fact remains that we must diligently keep in mind the distinction between attacking the MESSAGE (essential to critical thinking) and attacking the MESSENGER (antithetical to civil discourse on the most important issues we ALL face).

Just my $0.02. :shrug:

[Coexist]

21. actually, you are right -

I guess I just worry about my son.

Thanks for the clarification. You have given me much to think about. I'm going to show him your post.

[UALRBSofL]

18. Here are my thoughts. The Obama Campaign has instilled race into the campaign so bad

That every time someone says something the Obama Camp alerts the media it's racist. Then the Obama supporters follow suit. For example Bill said Hillary rob a bank and in the same breath Obama steal a car. So, was Bill a racist over Hillary as well? And here in Florida you can expect people to say something negative about Obama. I live in Florida. He is not popular here.

[Coexist]

20. so why did the man say that he was only supporting Obama b/c he was black?

your post confuses me.

[TahitiNut]

24. Don't be silly.

EVERYONE knows that when white folks in NOLA were carrying groceries through the water it was 'salvage' and when black folks were carrying groceries it was 'looting.' Clearly, Hillary would "take out a loan" while Obama would be "stealing."

As you (and others) so aptly articulate, it's obvious that blacks are responsible for racism. Yup.

:eyes:

:puke:

[angie_love]

19. LOL your kid schooled him. You're very lucky to have a son with such a great head on his shoulders

You're a good mom.

[BumRushDaShow]

26. You raised him right!

:thumbsup: He will represent the new generation that battles against this sort of divisiveness.

Hopefully he won't grow to be bitter if people continue to hurl the racist crap at him.

[zulchzulu]

27. PM me and I'll buy your kid an Obama hat

You raised him right!

[Coexist]

31. thank you for the kind offer

[zulchzulu]

47. Your son will be wearing his Obama hat next week!

USPS by next Friday...

:thumbsup:

[ClayZ]

32. Good idea!

PM me and I will send him a complimentary Barackarina* of Time. (we make them)

http://www.clayz.com/zelda.html


I love a good story about good kids!



*I just made that name up :rofl: it is really called an ocarina ...

[Coexist]

43. those look very cool.

[yellerpup]

29. Lucky you for having a great son.

Lucky him for having a great mom. Repugs can be such jerks. Your son handled him very well. Congratulations. Kids like yours is why 'hope' is so important to fulfill in our future.

[Irishonly]

33. You Must Be Very Proud

Your son handled the situation with grace and dignity which the man asking the question has only uncouthness and gall. I know many adults who couldn't have handled the situation at all, let alone giving a good answer. My gut tells me that if he had given him examples of votes and stances on issues the man wouldn't have known what he is talking about.

When I first read your title I thought your journal would be about someone telling him to take off his shirt. I think it's sad my first thought would be a free speech issue. We have lost so many rights it wouldn't have surprised me.

The man sounds like a typical, white, republican voter. He looks for the R behind the name and issues probably matter little to him or he is a chicken hawk. I am probably just as bad because I normally think the worst of republicans.

I wonder if society will ever get over its racism. You are a better person than I am. I probably would have said something to try to humiliate her. You cannot tell anything about a person by looks. I live is southern California and if you went by how a kid dressed or jewelry you would think about half of the kids were in gangs a few years ago. The other half could have been skaters.

Your son is taking an interest in politics and his future. My daughter is a senior this year and I have been appalled, as she is, at how little interest kids show. She cut her teeth on politics. I am happy to show her your post about your son. He's a good role model.

[JohnnyLib2]

36. Good kid, foolish adult.

[grantcart]

38. good mothers have good sons

[Coexist]

53. that was sweet - but I'm not perfect as a mom

I just do my best and hope its enough - like all parents.

[DerekJ]

40. Your son for president.

:hi:

Ya never know

[uponit7771]

42. Sounds like your kid is informed, that a rareity...

[JimGinPA]

45. You Should Keep Your Kid Off Of Golf Courses...

And keep him home - making phone calls for the campaign.


K&R

[rinsd]

46. What kind of asshole rages at a complete stranger like that?

[TexasLady]

51. Exactly.

If the prick had come up to my 18 yr old daughter like that, she'd have finally had a use for her mace!
That's creepy.

[knixphan]

48. my thoughts - KEEP the insult.

Your son's got an ally in Los Angeles - tell him that!

[Coexist]

52. I will.

thanks!

[HughBeaumont]

50. "You can keep your Tiger Woods. We have Senator McCain!"

Par for the course.

Luckily, troglodytes like these will soon find themselves in history's moldy dustbin, and they're pissed off to no end that they can do absolutely nothing about it.

[goletian]

54. my only complaint about your son...

he didnt ask the idiot, "what the fuck has john mccain done besides get tortured for 5 years that qualifies him for the presidency in his 72 fuckin years of age?!" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, mccain supporters are the stupidest fuckin people on earth. hes got all this "experience" with nothing to show for it.

that time when obama supporters were asked to explain their support was fuckin absurd. on a forum full of conservatives, i asked the same thing on mccain. responses i got were:

pow
war hero
attended naval academy
reputation as maverick willing to break from party line

LOL, so what the fuck did he do????????? no one had an answer. the guy is fucking pathetic. AND hes a blatant flip flopper unlike any ever seen EVER. what a fuckin joke.

i was kiddin about complaint on your son, hes a good kid. but man, that fucker that asked him those questions is a fuckin brain dead moron. mccain is a fuckin idiot, 0 credentials, flip flopper, doesnt even know what the fuck is goin on in the war on terra, yet hes the foreign policy expert? ahahahahha, ridiculous. and then he puts his ignorance on display again in front of patraeus, because his stupid ass tried to sound smart by adding his own commentary, as if he was in the know of something he obviously was not. lol, hes a fuckin joke.

[knixphan]

62. yep!

[mrreowwr_kittty]

55. Sounds like your son handled it very well.

Ya know, I'm getting real tired of this Obama-doesn't-have-enough-experience-specific-plans cliche. For people who claim that Obama is full of platitudes and empty rhetoric, they sure use a lot of it to justify their opposition to him. I've taken to telling people to stop lazily repeating talking points and do some research on the man. The information about what he's done and what he stands for is readily available.

[Dr Fate]

56. The Kids are Alright. n/t

n/t

[PoliticalAmazon]

58. During Bush Sr reelection, I was often confronted when wearing...

...anti-Bush t-shirts, always by a group of young, college-age males.

It happened a couple of times a week, on average. I had never had such aggressive confrontations before when wearing political t-shirts and haven't since.

This feeling by the GOP that they are entitled to aggressively confront a person over a t-shirt may be raising its ugly head again.

Don't stop wearing your t-shirts, just be aware and prepared with some short, snappy, but nonconfrontational responses.

[WillyT]

59. Your Kid Did Fantastic !!!

Give him a hug for me, please!!!

:bounce::yourock::bounce:

[Coexist]

61. I will

y'all have been great.

[knixphan]

63. takes a village.

[krkaufman]

66. You should be very proud of your son.

And I didn't take his "stupid thing to say, mister" as insulting. It *was* a stupid thing to say, and kudos to your son for being courageous enough to say it.

The only caveat is that he may not want to be TOO courageous, as someone crazy enough to track him down and confront him on a t-shirt may be as temperamental as McCain.