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At what point does a social drinker become a heavy drinker? At what point does a heavy drinker become an alcoholic? Some would answer 'when your drinking becomes more important than things you used to find more important' or something like that.
"Honey, wanna take your daughter to the park?" my wife would ask.
"No, I think I'll just stay here with my bottle of tequila."
Like many addicts, I realized several months back I had a problem. And because I've always been disciplined, I was able to quit cold turkey. A complete cut-off. I'm talking about uncorking the bottles and pouring them down the drain.
What was my drink of choice? Democratic Underground. Or, rather, online politics in general. I spent a lot of time on it. And other things suffered because of it. Other than finding myself doing one more browser refresh before bedtime just to check if anyone else had replied to my posts (which often resulted in staying up one more hour... or two... and missing putting my little girl to bed), my 'real world' political activity was suffering also. I wasn't devoting as much time to meetings and planning and strategy. While I was arguing the merits of Democratic presidential candidates who are virtual twins ideologically, it was looking like Republican Rep. Tom Price was going to run for re-election unopposed, or with very weak opposition.
See, Georgia's 6th Congressional District where I live is a tough place to be a Democrat. The Washington Post once described it as "the Great White North, a Republican pollster’s dream, a sprawl of affluent suburbs as far as the eye can see, a Lexus in every driveway and a Lean Cuisine in every microwave." This was Newt Gingrich's district and it's where Democrats have fought and died. I've seen many Democrats of every imaginable stripe - liberal, conservative, and all points in between - lose elections in these parts. In fact, it's hard to remember the last time a Democrat won a race of importance here. A city council race or two, maybe.
So one day I just quit posting on DU. I quit hitting all my bookmarked blogs and sites. I even quit posting on my blog. And suddenly I had a lot of free time. And with that free time, I built a new website for the Democratic organization I'm vice-chair of. I helped plan upcoming fund raisers and canvassing and candidate recruitment - things I used to do in years past but had lost interest in lately or just didn't have the time for.
And my outlook slowly evolved. A few months ago I was saying I opposed John McCain but wouldn't be too terribly uncomfortable with him as President if he won. Now when asked about him I say, "No way, no how! Why would we want to replace George Bush's administration with someone from the party that spawned him?"
When I'm asked who I support for the Democratic nominee, I reply "We win either way." And I mean it. Sure, I still prefer Sen. Clinton but not enough to even consider sitting out this election if she doesn't win the nomination. In fact, I would be proud to have Senator Obama as my President. It's important to have passion but even more important to channel it in a productive direction. I have friends, Democrats, who've never given DU (or KOS or any community site) one unique hit. Yet they're volunteering at the state party headquarters and registering people to vote at local retirement homes. The Democratic nomination will not be won or lost on Democratic Underground or DailyKOS or any blog/website. The General election won't be, either.
So, you might be asking if I'm hitting the bottle again. The answer is yes... but only moderately so. I may just set it down right here for another few weeks.
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