The people spoke, the bastards

[dsc]

As Hillary supporters we must come to terms with a simple truth, our candidate lost. We have every right to be upset over this development and the fact that some supporters of Obama are complete jackasses. But our candidate lost, under the rules that everyone agreed to at the beginning of this exercise. We have every right not to vote for Obama, but not to call ourselves Democrats if we don't. On some levels this will be easier for me because I was more an opponent of Obama than a supporter of Clinton. While I liked the idea of a woman president, I also liked that of a black president. Not being a member of either group the history was about the same to me.

It is easy to understand women in particular, being very upset over how this went down. While Hillary made several mistakes, you would have to be delusional not to recognize that sexism played a huge part in the press coverage of this race. Watching today's Meet the Press was almost surreal. To see a panel on a network with not one (Chris Matthews), not two (David Gregory), but three (Keith Olberman) seperate commentators who had to apologize for sexist language directed toward either Hillary or Chelsea Clinton claim that sexism didn't exist was just ludricrious. You can find no similarly positioned TV commentators who made similarly racist comments about Obama, let alone three. But in the final analysis, and absent evidence of Obama's campaign being complicit, one has to decide which is more important, a symbolic gesture about sexism in the press or the benefits of the policies Democrats would bring. I know which way I think the decision should go but it isn't my ox being gored.

As Hillary supporters we have a choice. Are we Democrats first, or supporters of Clinton first? Do we care about the issues more than the personalities? Obama has my vote barring his naming Nunn or a similar homophobe as VP. It won't be a joyful vote. It surely isn't a vote of confidence in the percentage of his supporters who are mean spirited and send threatening private messages. I figure worst case we will get two decent SCOTUS Justices out of the deal. AFter that it would all be gravy as I don't really expect much else.

[monmouth]

1. Your post is well thought out and beautifully written. I can empathize with your

feelings, I was so invested in Joe Biden. To this day I still think he dropped out too early, but that's neither here nor there. Perhaps there will be a Cabinet position for him in the future. Now, getting back to your wonderful post. As a very young woman I was fortunate to be working in New York at the time and was fortunate to have been able to sneak out of the office now and then to hear Gloria, Bella and Betty. They were formidable women in so many ways and opened the floodgates for women of our time.

I found the courage to tell a verbally and at times, a physically abusive husband to shove it. Financially, I took a plunge, but it was well worth it. I found the courage to walk into my boss's office and demand to know why the guy I was training was going to make more money than me. (I did get the salary increase). I would love to see, and look forward to the day, very much, when a woman becomes POTUS. I admire the Goldas, Margaret Thatchers, the Bhuttos, and other women who have lead countries. Not once, did these women ever complain, when things did not go their way, that it was due to sexism, imagined bias, their opponents supporters, etc.


If Hillary were a different type woman I most likely would have gotten on her bandwagon. She just isn't. She is not, at least to me, likable, trustworthy, non-manipulative or non-calculating. If her last name were not Clinton I doubt we would even be having this conversation.

I do understand your sense of loss. I hope in the forthcoming months you watch, listen and perhaps come to admire at least part of what Barack Obama stands for. God knows we do not need another Bush III. I also liked your point about SCOTUS. You just know Rove vs. Wade will be overturned if a Rep is elected. Dear dsc, the hurt will heal. In the meantime my hopes for you and other HRC supporters is to sit back, relax and come to the realization that we need to beat the real bastards in this election, the Republican party. Have a wonderful summer.

[DarienComp]

2. Good on you.

Emminently reasonable and constructive post.

[roguevalley]

27. best thread title ever

[Catherina]

3. There's a reason I've always appreciated you dsc

This is only proof. I hope the next 8 years will be very good to you and have a real advancement for human equality.

[libnnc]

4. NEVER forget. McCain will kill us. I don't think Obama wants that.

McCain seeks to kill the kids you teach, DSC. He wants war with Iran. He wants it so bad he can taste it. And the kids that you teach will be on the front lines.

Don't ever forget that.

[truedelphi]

5. Thank you for your reasoned reaction

And sorry for you that your candidate is losing.

However to claim that the media was not a bit racist is a bit startling. Or maybe the media was not racist, but they sure were willing to go the extra 400 miles to avoid calling out certain segments of America's voters as being racist.

The media went all out on the notion that "non-racist" yet somehow all white-skinned voters in West Virginia and Ohio - the hard working, poorly educated, "non elites" all decided not due to reasons of race but due to their being hard working, porrly educated "non elites" that Hillary was a better fit for their ballot.

Jeez Louise, you have to be in total denial to not realize that the media simply would go to any length to avoid a discussion of the racism issue. And yet, just as the media has been in total denial (until abt a year ago) that this war is not a good idea, and just as the media has been in total denial abt the economy, still showing reports that we "may" be heading for a downturn, the media was in denial (or coverup mode) about racism.

Jon Stewart however, was not in denial and had a field day with the footage.

[dsc]

6. the media asked every white voter but no black ones

if race had some influence upon their choice. In New Hampshire we heard, despite evidence to the contrary, about the Bradley effect for days. We also heard many discussions about Hispanics refusal to vote for blacks. I won't say there was no racism, but again, there was nothing even remotely similar to comparing Clinton to a nagging wife, Glen Close's character in Fatal Attraction, and a crazy ex wife.

[truedelphi]

11. You don't think the media was being a tad racist when they had footage of Michelle

Obama, looped to paly every thirty seconds, decrying her dislike for America's policies??

"Hey shouldn't we play the footage of that angry black woman some more today?"

And while Hagee got a free pass on his hateful remarks, Rev Wright got more play than a losing fumble at a tied-up SuperBowl game.

[dsc]

12. honesty it was probably partially racist

though she did say a plainly easy to take to the races kind of statement. Kind of like Hillary's latest gaffe.

[GoesTo11]

30. Why don't Hillary's feminist supporters like Michelle?

[quantass]

34. Because she would become the new Alpha-Female over Hillary -- the new 1st Lady if you will.

And to her supporters, Hillary is THE "1st lady" and Michelle is taking that away.

[truedelphi]

38. That is one good question.

I think that Michelle has as much charisma and savvy as her husband.

And she is truly connected to the lower income. Not in the faux way that Hillary's camp claims for her. (I grew up in Chicago and the "middle Income" area that Hillary's executive father had the family live in was more Pill Hill than Middle class.)

[The Doctor.]

7. As the ONLY Clinton supporter who really tried to back up his claims,

you had my respect. I see it was well deserved.

I believe most of the asshole supporters of Obama are likely trolls, as I know that many of the Clinton supporters are as well. If someone sent you, one of the more rational people, threatening PMs, I certainly hope they've been TS'd.

Out of curiousity, what did Olberman have to apologize for that was 'sexist'?

[dsc]

9. the take Hillary to a back room and only one person come out crack

and thanks.

[The Doctor.]

10. Huh....

That doesn't really pass the 'sexist' test.

That could be said about a man or a woman and has nothing to do with gender.

"Someone who could take 'Obama' into a back room and be the only one to walk out." - That's about as racist as the example with Clinton is sexist.

Sure it's not necessarily appropriate, but the implication is that the negotiation would be one-sided, not necessarily 'violent'. I'm quite certain that's what he meant, but we Americans are great at being hypersensitive and interpreting what we will in the worst light possible.

Thanks for finding it though.

[LWolf]

8. Other:

I have never been a supporter of HRC, although I cast a vote for her in my primary because Obama was ahead in my state.

I'm not a Democrat first. I'm a human being first. Then I'm a woman, a daughter, a mother, and a grandmother. I'm a teacher, and a friend. I'm a leftist liberal, an independent thinker, an environmentalist, an evolving pacifist, a semi-socialist, a feminist, and a product of the working poor who earned a college degree.

I'm an idealist and a cynic. I'm the enemy of bureacracy, of corruption, and of conventional wisdom and the status quo. I'm many, many things before I'm a Democrat.

For me, the party is a tool, a vehicle, for accomplishing change. It's not a church, it's not a gang, and it's only value is in what change it stands for and what change it moves forward. When the party is wrong, the party doesn't have my support.

If all Democrats took that view, the party would be healthier, more robust, and less corrupt, imo.

To be honest, I find politics, politicians, and the political process to be dishonest, corrupt, and repulsive altogether. I still do my duty as a citizen, to speak out for, and vote for, what I believe to be right for the world. I do so because I have principles.

Party will never trump principles for me.

[FlyingSquirrel]

13. Wow, I had no idea people sent out threatening private messages

over something so stupid as which candidate you support. I would expect that kind of thing to lead to a very quick TS. That doesn't usually happen?

[slinkerwink]

16. yeah, what kind of an idiot harrasses by PM on DU? That would be very lame and earns a pizza.

[uponit7771]

14. knr

[slinkerwink]

15. Thank you for this reasoned post. There HAS been sexism towards Clinton--especially from tweety

but it isn't why she lost the race in my opinion.

[dsc]

17. it certainly didn't help

Clearly the press decided that she was evil and they would cover her harshly, just like they did to Gore in 2000. Unlike Bradley, Obama was able to take advantage of the very favorable enviroment that created for him. Maybe Obama would have won anyhow. The press didn't cause the strategic mistakes she made, but I have my doubts. For me it is kind of like last week when our yearbooks came out and the gay straight alliance's picture wasn't in it. I am told it was a simple error. Maybe that is true. But frankly, I have my doubts.

[slinkerwink]

20. Well, from my point of view, she was treated as the inevitable candidate by the press in 2007

and I don't think Obama has received a lot of favorable coverage--it pretty much ended when Wright came out. That was really bad for him, and could've ended his campaign, but it didn't. The press basically ran the footage of an angry black pastor nonstop for three weeks. The coverage was inescapable. I didn't see Hillary get that amount of negative coverage--her Tuzla gaffe only lasted for four days.

[dsc]

22. go to mediamatters.org and read

seriously, if you still think Hillary didn't get a raw deal then so be it.

[VotesForWomen]

18. good points, but for me, being called a bitch and a racist is personal; if that's what O 'inspires'

in people, i don't think it's a good idea to have him representing the democratic party in the white house. it's bad for the democratic party, which is bad for america.

[AllentownJake]

19. I've been called

A mysoginist and naive. I've also personally been insulted by Hillary Clinton when she refers to Obama supporters. I do not believe Obama himself has ever said anything insulting about the people who support Senator Clinton. If you take what people say on the internet personally you really need to take a break from the computer.

[slinkerwink]

21. Obama didn't call you a 'bitch' or a 'racist' nor did he say that Clinton's supporters were racist

or bitches. He's never said anything like that.

[Liberal Veteran]

24. good points, but for me, being called a misogynist and sexist is personal; if that's what H 'inspire

s' in people, I don't think it's a good idea to have her representing the democratic party in the white house. It's bad for the democratic party, which is bad for america.

[NC_Nurse]

23. Thanks, dsc! I appreciate your support, even grudging.

:hi:

[TBF]

25. dsc, Obama told us to be nice to Hillary's supporters, so I put them on "ignore"

so I wouldn't be tempted to say something inappropriate. There's over 50 of them there now, but you're right here where I can see you, and I'm glad about that. At some point I'll have to go clear out the ignore list, because I'm sure everyone will calm down eventually. I can't imagine why anyone sent you hateful pm's - that's just wrong.

Your post is thoughtful and correct. McCain will do nothing good for you. Obama hasn't offically won yet, and many of us Obama supporters have actually had to think through the same thing. The race has been close all along and if Hillary would somehow win, would we vote for her? I think most really would come around in time, because the alternative is just way too terrifying.

[intaglio]

26. It is difficult - especially

Especially with rampaging haters on both sides of the divide. A Democratic President is needed and those few disruptors who belong to the Clintonian or Obamian party rather than the Democratic party need to go away grow up.

[AZBlue]

28. Great post!

Thank you for your wise words - go Democrats!!!

[Divine Discontent]

29. K&R 15! great post and I concur about Nunn since you say he's a homophobe - no homophobe VP! eom

[SeattleGirl]

31. I hope you reported whoever it was that sent you the threatening

PM's. There's no excuse for that. None.

As to the rest of your post, I understand your feeling. I was disheartened when Edwards dropped out, after it became apparent Clinton and Obama were going to continue beating him.

Thank you for your thoughtful post.

[yewberry]

32. If Clinton were to be the nom I'd vote for her every day of the week

and twice on Sunday.

Honestly, for my own reasons, I went for Obama in our caucus. I won't pretend that I was an early Obama supporter or that I didn't struggle with my decision--I did.

I saw and continue to see how the media has made sly (and not-so-sly) sexist remarks against Senator Clinton. I hope that you know that most of us who are paying attention really do see that crap, and really do take it seriously.

As a woman, a feminist, a child of a lesbian family, and a progressive, I want to see a woman president in my lifetime. I'm going to repeat something I've said before--A Clinton nomination might be a validation of the experience of women, but the failure of the Clinton nomination is not an invalidation of the experience of women.

We are stronger than that. All of us are.

I do want us to pull together, and I hope that can happen. Personality politics are so much less important than the SCOTUS and Iraq and habeas corpus.

And I'm sorry that you're hurting.

[ruby slippers]

33. Well said. Work through it and we will open our arms up to you...

The five stages of grief are:


1-Denial-"this can't be happening to me", looking for the former spouse in familia places, or if it is death, setting the table for the person or acting as if they are still in living there. No crying. Not accepting or even acknowledging the loss.


2-Anger-"why me?", feelings of wanting to fight back or get even with spouse of divorce, for death, anger at the deceased, blaming them for leaving.


3-Bargaining-bargaining often takes place before the loss. Attempting to make deals with the spouse who is leaving, or attempting to make deals with God to stop or change the loss. Begging, wishing, praying for them to come back.


4-Depression-overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, frustration, bitterness, self pity, mourning loss of person as well as the hopes, dreams and plans for the future. Feeling lack of control, feeling numb. Perhaps feeling suicidal.


5-Acceptance-there is a difference between resignation and acceptance. You have to accept the loss, not just try to bear it quietly. Realization that it takes two to make or break a marriage. Realization that the person is gone (in death) that it is not their fault, they didn't leave you on purpose. (even in cases of suicide, often the deceased person, was not in their right frame of mind) Finding the good that can come out of the pain of loss, finding comfort and healing. Our goals turn toward personal growth. Stay with fond memories of person.

[Withywindle]

35. Thank you so much for the sincere and rational post.

I do agree with you that Clinton got plenty of sexist shit thrown at her, and I hate it. (I stood up against it a few times here, but after so many rounds of being told that I wasn't a "real feminist" because I support Obama, I got too many bad college womyn's-group flashbacks and so kept my mouth shut) But I disagree that there were no corresponding racist attacks on Obama (more veiled and coded, perhaps, but no less vile).

The important thing is, knowing that we had our first woman candidate with a strong chance and our first black candidate with a strong chance, we KNEW that was coming. How could we not? Both candidates knew too. How could they not?

Some on DU have handled those choppy waters with grace and some...haven't. (We should have known that was coming too. How could we not?) This primary campaign has given people an opportunity to talk about sexism and racism. Some have taken that opportunity (sometimes kicking and screaming) and learned and grown as a result. Others....haven't. (But we knew that would happen).

I SO look forward to the day we have our first open GLBT candidate with a strong chance. I hope I'm still around for it. I think if I see my doctor and eat my veggies and quit smoking this decade, I will be. :D

Thanks again. Breath of fresh air.

[windbreeze]

36. I was really getting worried, thanks for this post....n/t

[mcctatas]

37. Nicely done....

you are a brave soul and a good Democrat! If it's any consolation, I'd vote for Hillary if she were to be the nominee.....

[Spazito]

39. Very thoughtful OP

I would simply like to :kick:

and

Recommend.