What do you think was in the letter stupid left

[louis-t]

for Obama?
I'll start: "Pleehee-ase don't have me arrested!1!!1!"

[oldtime dfl_er]

1. The Jack Daniels is in the bottom right drawer

Only I doubt he could spell "drawer" correctly.

[kestrel91316]

4. OMG, great minds think alike. Check out my simultaneous post below.

[kestrel91316]

2. Probably told him the best place to keep a secret stash of Jack Daniels.

[bkcc]

3. Not sure, but I bet it was written in crayon. n/t

[sui generis]

5. Thuh nuke-ular codes are, wait, fool me uh, fool me again.

"Mission Accomplished!"

You know it wasn't "Bin Laden determined to attack NYC skyscrapers by flying commercial airliners into buildings"

[HereSince1628]

6. The ignition key to the Roswell UFO. n/t

[waiting for hope]

7. This was entertaining -

WASHINGTON, DC - Continuing the tradition, outgoing President Bush left a personal note to the new President Obama in the Oval Office.

Weekly World News investigators have uncovered a copy. Below are sections of the letter from President Bush, welcoming and advising the new President:

“If you’re brokering peace with Israel and Pakistan Portugal whoever, ask Miles in the kitchen to make those yummy crab thingies. People always love them and it gets everybody talking!”

“In case of an emergency, there’s a bag of chips taped under the desk in the Oval Office.”

“Amanda who’s in charge of laundry gets really cranky sometimes, compliment her hair and she’ll ease right up.”

“Ask Manny in the grounds crew about the luau. He’ll know what you mean, heh heh.”

“If the Vice President ever tells you ‘Not now, in your second term’, don’t believe him. He’ll forget and never get around to it.”

“Never let them make you eat caviar at a state function. It tastes gross and you’re the President, you shouldn’t have to.”

“Yell ‘GUN!’ some time and watch the Secret Service guys react. They hate when you do that, but it’s worth it!”

A full page was dedicated to explaining how to work the television in the living area. Three false starts were crossed out before the former President got it right, culminating with the advice “But you’ve got kids so when in doubt, just ask them. I’m leaving you a remote cozy to keep the clicker in. Otherwise, they can get lost pretty easily.”

Bush continued, “You know the office of the President can be a very difficult job. This book really helped me get through the rough times in office.” Sitting next to the note was a copy of The Secret.

Mr. Bush also left a note for the Obama girls, Sasha and Maliya. Inside it outlined people they would be running into, including who is nice and who makes the best snacks. He concluded the note with “Don’t ask the Secret Service men for piggy back rides, they won’t do it. I learned the hard way. The Vice President, however, is required by the Constitution to give piggy back rides to anyone in the First family, whenever they want!”

While departing away in Marine One helicopter, Former President Bush convinced the pilot to do a fly-by to the Capitol one last time.

http://weeklyworldnews.com/politics/bushs-note-to-obama/

[Dennis Donovan]

8. The ending to "My Pet Goat" with a handwritten note saying...

"This is so you can cut to the chase and not make the same mistake I made by waiting to read how it turned out. Heh, heh, heh..."

[Spazito]

9. "Watch out for those terr-ist pretzels" n/t

[bif]

10. His recipe for the perfect Martini.

[npincus]

11. the infamous "pee-pee" note? (signed, of course)

"Condi, can I please wee-wee?"

[Blaze Diem]

12. "WMD are not in the Oval Office...I already looked."

he he. smirk.

[lutherj]

13. Hey Baracky, let me give you a couple words of advice on how to have

a successful presidency and a good legacy. First, don't listen to the polls. It's not a popularity contest. There's tough decisions to be made, see? You'll never make everbody happy. Second. When it comes to fighting evil-doers, you got to go with your gut. You're a guy who likes to think about things, I can tell that about you. But with terrorists, you got to act fast and come down hard, play dirty. Otherwise they blow shit up. Like on 9/11.

Hey you sure got two cute girls there! We left them some cookies in the kitchen.

Anyway, good luck, and roll with the punches.

I'm outta here.

GWB

[Shiver]

14. "Hey numbah 44,

Well, here are the keys to the country. It pulls to the left a little, but just turn hard right all the time, don't crash inta Mexicanadia and ye'll be fine. Heh heh heh. If ya wanna come down t'my ranch sumtime and do one o'them photo-thingys, let me know! I can set up some "brush" for us to "clear" - the good Columbian brush, if ya catch my drift. Heh heh heh. I mean cocaine, of course.

As ya can see from the great job I did

Lookin'back on all the good I've done, I just wanna say

If I can give ya any advice, it would be

Heck with it. Countrys yers now Obammy. No give-backs times infinity!

Nyah nyah,
#43"

[ItNerd4life]

15. It was written with a CRAYON

and none of the words were spelled correctly.

Obama couldn't understand it.

That's why he spent 10 minutes reading it trying to figure out WTF?