Say G'Night, Tammy - Democratic Underground

NanceGreggs

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Thu Mar-26-09 12:10 AM
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Say G'Night, Tammy

Back in the days when I first became aware of people like Limbaugh and O’Reilly, I suspected that they had been “educated” to be obnoxious, bloviating whack-jobs. Realizing they were basically good for nothing, they set off for college, good ol’ Fuck U, where they took courses like Passing Off Dumbass Opinions as Fact, Advanced Hypocrisy, Winning Converts through Fear & Paranoia, Reagan Worship and Theory and Whining 101.

But lately I’ve been rethinking my stance. It seems that the current crop of right-wing nutcases are too similar, in word and misdeed, to simply have attended the same brainwashing sessions. Even the talking points memo they devour first thing in the morning can’t account for the lock-mouthed spewing – and there’s always the risk that some individuality might creep into the daily discourse.

I am now convinced these folks are being bred and raised in captivity, perhaps on a ranch in Area 51, where they are brought up to believe that facts are the tools of the Devil. And being as Liberals are usually armed with such inconvenient truths, they are surely the spawn of Satan bent on the destruction of the nation – or what’s left of it after eight years of an FU wannabe (his dad didn't have the necessary pull in this instance) being at the helm.

Just as movie directors once called down to central casting for an actor specific-to-type – “Send me one blonde bombshell, and one freckle-faced boy-next-door” – so the TV and radio producers of today can fax the Flying Asshole Ranch and order-up a suitable clueless harpy or drug-addled loud-mouth to fit the bill on an as-needed basis.

“Send me one totally devoid-of-any-intelligence airhead who isn’t afraid to demonstrate her ignorance and utter stupidity in front of a microphone – the more obnoxious, the better!”

A perfect case in point would be Tammy Bruce, who filled in for Laura Ingraham earlier this week.

A sampling of her diatribe (do these people do anything other than “diatribe”?) supports my theory, and then some:

“There's no other way to look at a side of politics that for eight years gave aid and comfort to the enemy by attacking the president. Democrat politicians and pundits, liberal pundits, hoping the war would fail, simply because they hated George W. Bush so much …”

What Tammy seems incapable of understanding is – well, a lot. But specifically, Liberals didn’t want the war in Iraq to fail, they knew it would, being cognizant of those nasty little things called facts, along with being under the voo-doo spell of common sense. As for giving aid and comfort to the enemy by attacking the president, Tammy forgot to be specific in pointing out how one’s aidin’-‘n’-comfortin’ mileage may vary, depending on whether there is a (D) or an (R) following the president’s name.

Unfortunately, Tammy missed Fred Thompson’s quote by a mere twenty-four hours: “I want his (Obama’s) policies that I believe take us in the wrong direction to fail.” Would have loved to hear her take on that.

But she goes on about the Liberals’ treatment of the Worst.President.Ever. “Eight years calling him a monkey, a chimp, an idiot, a liar, a mass murderer, a war criminal …”

The response to this would seem obvious – but, alas, people like Tammy don’t “get” the obvious: If the behave-like-Cheney-the-organ-grinder’s-pet, act-like-a-buffoon, astoundingly-low-IQ, we-don’t-torture-even-if-we-actually-DO, millions-dead-in-Iraq-and-elsewhere-due-to-my-policies, ignore-the-Geneva-Conventions shoe fits, it’s pretty damned certain some people are going to tell you to wear it.

The most irritating thing about Tammy and her ilk is the fact that they seem to believe that because the left called Bush out for his many crimes and misdemeanours, the right are justified in calling President Obama and his wife “trash” (which Tammy did) – not based on anything he’s said or done, but simply based on a tit-for-tat mentality that dictates that name-calling should be engaged in, warranted or not, because you did it when MY guy was in office – so there!

(I should have mentioned that while Fuck U is considered an institution of higher learning by some, it’s really kindergarten, 24-7, and the students never progress past the I-know-you-are-but-what-am-I stage, despite any and all claims to the contrary.)

(I should also mention that no doubt some right-winger will note my use of the word “tit”, and chastise me for my typical-of-Liberals lack of morals – and I’ll put good money on the fact that the outrage will emanate from a family-values, God-fearin’-Christian Republican who’s got a wife in his home state, a mistress in DC, a young boy who he’s supporting in an undisclosed location, and a running tab at several bordellos that cater to customers with a taste for rough trade.)

As tempting as it is to comment on all of Tammy’s inane remarks, alas this series of tubes has only such much available bandwidth. So let me end with this from her website:

”Obama obviously does not know how to govern and the stakes are higher than winning an election – it’s about whether or not this nation survives or goes bankrupt as B. Hussein Urkel pushes his Social Engineering scheme at the expense of everyone's future.”

Yes, Tammy, it IS about whether this nation survives – and if Barack Hussein Obama can undo the damage done by one G. PNACcio Bush, the man who “governed” us into an unwinnable war, a surplus-turned-deficit, a financial meltdown, unfathomable debt, and the derision of the world, it will be a fuckin’ miracle.

But that’s the thing about Obama. He’s not just in any business – he’s in the miracle-working business. Because after eight years of BushCo, somebody had to be – and thank God we’ve elected the right man for the job.

Say "g'night, Tammy" - and if you have enough brain cells to turn yourself over, you might want to do that right about now - because you are SO done.