How would the world be different if all four gospels in the New Testament

[Boojatta]

repeatedly quoted Jesus as saying, "If somebody claims to be a follower of me or my ideas, then I don't want you to vote for that person. However, there's one exception. If somebody uses obvious code language to send the message of being a follower of me or my ideas, without actually making the open claim, then the person is underhanded and you must vote against that person even if that means voting for someone who claims to be a follower of me or my ideas."

[Goblinmonger]

1. What if all four gospels had Jesus saying

"Don't be a douchebag and discriminate against homosexuals. They are people, too, and I love them as much as everyone else. Hell, I am one."

OR

"I'm not real. This is all made up."

OR

"Mmmmmmmm Brains."

[Trajan]

2. What would be different if ....

Jesus was quoted as saying "Rack'm up - It's my turn"

or ...

Jesus was quoted as saying "Anybody seen Judas lately ? - That guy has my cart!"

or ...

Jesus was quoted as saying "I am SO PLEASED with how Herod and the Romans are running things .... I'm headed to Caesarae for the weekend, gonna be some great surfing!"

Wow .... This is fun ...

[juno jones]

3. Heck, they don't even listen to the things he did say already.

I doubt that he could pierce their willful blindness had he spelled it out in fourteen foot high neon letters.

[RC]

4. To complicated to follow for those that need to hear it.

Them kinda people needs the KISS thingy applied to them.

[saltpoint]

5. The Jesus we're given seemed to be very capable at the layered

remark and might have been able to pull this off.

Render unto this and render unto that, etc.

And he could spin a parable like nobody's business.

On the sheer mental agility of the given Jesus, I could definitely see it.

[Occam Bandage]

7. I would, however, ask why Jesus is talking about a representative democracy.

Not exactly the most pressing concerns for Jews in the first century AD. They were a bit more concerned with, y'know, the Romans and all.

[Nosmanic]

6. Tax

What Jesus really did say "Look at all these lazy beggers. When is the Romans going to apply the flat tax."