Since we are discussing AI and the various concerns about it, here is some info. readily available on the inter net:
http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/families/a/Insemination.htmInsemination is when sperm is inserted into a woman's uterus to attempt to create a pregnancy. Artificial insemination is a popular way for lesbians to get pregnant. A woman can use sperm from a known donor or from a sperm bank.
Pros and Cons of Using Sperm Bank
Pros of a Sperm Bank
Sperm banks require donors to waive any parental rights. There is no danger the donor can seek custody or visitation of your child.
Some sperm banks permit the child to access the donor once the child becomes an adult.
Sperm banks test semen for diseases and collect health and genetic information from donors.
Cons of a Sperm Bank
Sperm banks can be expensive and most insurance plans do not cover the cost.
Although you can choose certain characteristics of the donor, you will never meet him, so you can't know his personality.
Sperm banks freeze semen. Frozen semen is not as vigorous as fresh sperm and it may take longer to get pregnant.
Known Sperm Donor
Some women choose to get pregnant using a known donor. This can be a close friend or sometimes a relative of their partner. There are pros and cons to using a known donor.
Pros of using a known Donor
You know who he is: his health, family history, physical and mental health, characteristics and personality.
He might be open to being involved in the child's life.
You don't have to pay for the sperm, although you may have to pay a doctor to inseminate you.
Cons of using a known Donor
The biggest con of using a known donor is that he may sue for visitation or custody of the child.
There is a risk of HIV, AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases.
If the donor chooses to stay involved in the child's life, issues around parenting can come up.
If you are a lesbian thinking of becoming pregnant via artificial insemination, it is wise to seek out the advice of an attorney.
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http://www.lesbianhealthinfo.org/your_health/parenthood-alt-insemination.htmAlternative Insemination
by Helen Smith
Getting Pregnant through Alternative Insemination
Alternative insemination (AI) (also known as donor insemination, artificial insemination, and artificial fertilization) refers to a process where donated semen is inserted into a woman’s vagina or uterus for the purposes of conception. People have stopped using the term "artificial" insemination because it reflects a negative meaning, one that sees AI as being unnatural.
The use of alternative insemination has added an option for lesbians to become parents. Other ways lesbians become parents are through adoption, foster care, a heterosexual union, or raising family members. Today, many lesbians find AI to be a quicker and cheaper way to become parents than through adoption or foster care. They also tend to have less legal hassles when they go through AI. In addition, many lesbians want to experience carrying a child to term and giving birth. If you or your partner are thinking about AI you may want to take a few moments to review our advice below:
Alternative Insemination Advice:
1. Fertility Clinics - (List of Fertility Clinics)
Do research on fertility clinics before you choose one. Some clinics and/or doctors refuse to assist lesbians or single women with alternative inseminations. There are recognized clinics however, which support alternative insemination for lesbians and single women. If you are in an area where there is no clinic that will help, you can order sperm via clinics in other areas that will be shipped to you.
3. Type of Donor – Choosing a donor can be a difficult process. There are two types of donors: known and unknown. Known donors agree to have their identity released to the children born from their semen after the children reach a specific age. Most often the age is 18 years old. Known donors can also be someone the AI recipient knows. For example, it could be the brother of her partner. If you choose a donor that you know and become pregnant outside of a clinic, be aware that you may face legal complications regarding custody. If you choose to impregnate without using a clinic, the man has legal rights to the child. If you do it through a clinic, in most cases he gives up all parental rights through the law. However, this varies from state to state, so seek legal advice from an attorney knowledgeable in alternative families prior to getting pregnant. Unknown donors do not agree to have their identification released to the AI recipients or the children born from their semen.
4. Finances – Be aware that the expenses of AI can add up. Most women do not become pregnant after the first or second AI attempt. Depending upon the women, it can take a number of months or a year. In addition, if attempts fail you may add the cost of fertility drugs to the bill. In addition to this, think about your financial security. Create a budget that you feel will fit the needs of you, your partner (if you have one), and your child.
5. Stress - You may find the insemination process stressful. It often takes several tries before a woman becomes pregnant. Each month you must monitor your ovulation, which may change due to stress about conceiving. Sometimes women become worried about their capability to become pregnant, and stress about that. These pressures may cause women to become irritable and may impact your relationships.
6. Health Insurance – If you have insurance you should review your plan. Learn if it covers AI, fertility drugs, and hospital visits. Also learn what is covered and the policy costs to have your child added to your or your partners’ insurance.
7. Time - You may wish to create a time management plan. You may have to go the clinic for multiple AI visits, or you may have to arrange for the sperm to be shipped to you on certain dates.
8. Family reactions - Some families are supportive, others are not. For instance, some families who may have rejected their relative’s lesbian identity will put tensions aside for the sake of the baby. Other families will reject both the mother(s) and the child(ren). If you find your family reacting negatively to your situation you may want to refer them to an organization called PFLAG (Parents, Friends and Families of Lesbians and Gays).
9. Non-biological Parent - In reference to lesbians who became parents via alternative insemination, a non-biological parent is often the partner of the birth-mother. The non-biological parent will not have legal rights to the child unless she goes through second-parent adoption or a step-parent adoption which is only legal in some states. Some people may not consider her a “real parent” because she has no blood-connection to the child. Because of these reasons she may not feel as connected to the child, or may feel like an outsider within the family. To help the non-biological mother (the co-parent) feel better, it is essential that the birth mother recognize these factors and give her support. It is not uncommon for the non-biological mother to feel left out when the biological mother is breast-feeding. There are some reports of non-biological mothers being able to induce breast-milk, and also participate in breast-feeding the baby. However, most lesbian couples do not choose this option, due to the hormone supplementation required as well as the time it takes to use the electric breast pump to get the milk started in the non-biological mother. Some lesbian couples choose “co-maternity” in which the egg from one woman is mixed with the donor sperm, and the embryo is then placed in the uterus of the other woman. In this way, both women share in the pregnancy: one woman carries it, and the other woman has contributed the genetic material. However, this option is fairly costly.
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