What do you identify as?

[lightningandsnow]

Notice this isn't a poll, because there are infinite sexual and gender indentities in infinite combinations.

Are there any specific ways you identify yourself? Or do you prefer to not use labels at all?

I identify as a queer femme. I'm primarily attracted to women, but I've discovered lately that "lesbian" really doesn't fit me as well as I thought, because it implies you're attracted to women and only women, ever. To be honest, there have been a few guys (as well as people who identify as trans or genderqueer) that I've been attracted to as well. Still, I don't feel like "bisexual" or "pansexual" fit either, since I am way more attracted to women then I am to men. I'd say I'm between a 5.0 and a 5.5 on the Kinsey scale. So "queer" fits me just fine. Although if someone asks me "Are you straight, lesbian or bi?" I guess I'd answer "lesbian". But I hate it when people only give you those three options.

I also call myself a femme (another identity I've "discovered" lately), because it seems to be a lot more powerful than just being a lesbian who dresses girly. I don't think it has much to do with the kind of people I'm attracted to - I really like feminine characteristics in people, whether they're in a girl, guy, or genderqueer person. It has more to do with how I see myself.

[terrya]

1. I'm a gay man.

I don't have a problem per se with the word "queer", but I have always referred to myself as a gay man. I'm an exclusive 6 on the Kinsey scale.

[maddiejoan]

2. I'd say

I'm a transgendered woman who is attracted to people individually, and that their biological sex is not a big determining factor for me.

I suppose that makes me bisexual --but it doesn't 'feel' bisexual, it feels more like a case by case basis if you follow.

write me up as 'queer'.

[DarkTirade]

23. I think pansexual is the best term

but you could just say screw the labels and be yourself. :P

[Glorfindel]

3. What terrya said...perfectly put!

n/t

[Toasterlad]

4. I'm a 100% Gay Man.

A serious blow to women everywhere, I'm sure. ;-)

[Red Zelda]

5. I'm a golden retriever

[readmoreoften]

28. I don't think people should have the right to marry you.

Or your box turtle brethren.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

6. queer or pansexual.

[zonmoy]

7. Blue collar bear.

I recognize and enjoy my attraction to men but with the exception of the bear and leather aspects I never much liked much of what is seen as the gay scene.

[Tyo]

8. Sometimes queer, sometimes gay

depending on how radical I'm feeling or how much I happen to be feeling tied into "the culture" at a given time. Usually though I simply identify as Tyler.

[Moloch]

9. I always considered myself to be gay.

Is there an online test for the Kinsey scale?

[lightningandsnow]

10. Here's one for the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid

(Which is basically like an extended version of the Kinsey scale)...

http://www.youthnetsouthampton.org.uk/breakout/kleingrid.php

[MuseRider]

11. WOW thanks for that link.

I had never seen that before and I am a little surprised. I have always thought of myself as a strictly confirmed hetero but I guess the facts that my emotional bonds are mostly and preferably with women and that my friends fall equally in the hetero/homosexual groups have tipped me to a
1.5 or 1 = predominantly heterosexual, incidentally homosexual
2 = predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual

I looked and did not find what is meant by incidentally or if there was a particular definition. This is interesting, thanks.

[Zuiderelle]

12. I'm a 4 by that scale.

Apparently due to my earlier experiences before embracing my true gay self. :)

[Moloch]

19. Cool.. thank you.

I'm 5.05.

[Creideiki]

26. My only real objection with it

I'm only attracted to (and have only ever been attracted to) guys, but I've got friends and family that are straight--shock, I know, my parents are straight--so it says I've got some heterosexual inclination. Kind of confusing.

[mondo joe]

13. Smug gay atheist. NT

[DarkTirade]

14. I don't really have an orientation... just preferences. :)

I tend to go more for women than men, but it's really on an individual basis. I'm really incapable of being attracted to many people just because of who they are, rather than what they look like. I can think of several people who I can look at and say, "Yes, this person is incredibly hot.", but I don't feel any attraction to them whatsoever. And on the other hand I can think of a few people who I am attracted to who I can't honestly say are incredibly hot.

And my taste in looks changes depending on the person... some people look good with certain attributes, some don't. For the most part I go for long hair and pretty faces (hence my preference for women), but on some people short hair works better. On some a more rugged countenance works. It just depends on the person. I'm probably one of the few sci-fi geeks who had a crush on both Summer Glau from Firefly and John Barrowman from Dr. Who/Torchwood. Other than both being brunettes, there's really not much in common there. :P

As far as my gender orientation and whatnot, I'm male but I don't really give a shit about what 'males' are supposed to do and be, I'm just me. And I'm not all that attached to my gender either. If aliens decided it would be a funny joke to switch everyone's sex overnight, I'd be okay with that. (I'd also be pretty hot as a girl, if I do say so myself. :P ) I'm into many things that are artsy and considered by society to be either for women or gay men, but on the other hand I'm physically strong enough to kick the ass of just about any guy who'd have a problem with me not fitting their gender stereotypes. :)

[Chovexani]

33. That's pretty much how I feel too.

I have days when certain features are more appealing than others to me. The one universal thing that always does it for me is androgyny. I like butchy tomboy women and pretty boys.

And River? Pshaw, it's all about Zoe. :) Gina Torres is my TV wife, I actually sat through all of Cleopatra 2525 for her. :crazy:

[DarkTirade]

34. I go for brains and craziness, what can I say?

She's just so cute and innocent and has the grace and agility of a dancer.... with that touch of homicidal psychosis and the ability to kick more ass than I can.

That, and really, who would you rather have sex with? The energetic and powerful one, or the agile, graceful one with the strength and endurance of a dancer... and the ability to READ YOUR FRIKKIN' MIND so she knows exactly how whatever she's doing to you feels, and she knows what you want the moment you want it. :P

Seriously, telepath sex must be awesome.

[mitchtv]

15. pretty much what Terrya said

same guy 31 years

[LeftHander]

16. transfemme

I think that not being totally girlie and not far along in transition to really call my self a transwoman...and too old to be a t-girl...



I like the OP's identity of " queer femme".

[Chovexani]

17. Lesbian-Identified Bisexual (or, failing that, Queer)

I'm pretty much dead in the middle of the Kinsey scale, but I forget where I am on the Klein grid. I go through cycles where I slide closer to one side or another, but I am fairly equally attracted to all genders.

I consider myself lesbian-identified (or more commonly, queer) though because I have never felt any connection to the hetero world despite loving and being sexually attracted to men. The LGBT community for all its faults is where I feel more at home.

[swimmernsecretsea]

18. Fierce!

[LeftHander]

31. I like that....nt

[littlebit]

20. Lesbian

I am a 5.86 on that scale. I have always been attracted to women and always will be.

[galledgoblin]

21. female lesbian/queer

4.82 on the scale from that quiz

I won't deny that I've had heterosexual relationships, but they were predominantly emotional- the most I ever did physically was make out, and shortly after that I came out. ever seen "But I'm a Cheerleader"? the way she seemed to be gagging? yeah, that was me... he was a nice guy though.

even in dreams, I've only gone as far as kissing with men.

women, though... well, I won't go into details there, this isn't that kind of board.

[dropkickpa]

22. A butch-ish bi-girl

If I didn't have giant boobs, I'd totally be gender-queer (hell, I still occassionally get mistaken for a boy). These things growing were TRAUMATIC for me back then. Now I kinda like them about 60% of the time.

[ccharles000]

24. ...

gay,queer,and cub(young bear):smoke:

[Creideiki]

25. Fully gay male

[readmoreoften]

27. Femme. As in old-timey butch-femme femme.

She wears suits and ties, binds, and I'm attracted to her strength and solidness. She opens my door, kills the insects, builds stuff in the backyard, maintains the cars. She also does the laundry and cooks. I'm just the eye candy. ;) Nah. I do my share. I'm no wilting violet, though. When it comes to physical defense, it's all her. When it comes to verbal defense, it's all me.

My pet peeve is when people say "oh I'm not into roles" as if it's so enlightened and superior to be androgenous. Yeah, I'm not into 'roles' either. We don't live our lives playing some kind of game. There's just something in me that reacts to her butchness and something in her that reacts to a girl in heels and that's just the way it is. I'm also attracted to the innocence and shyness and sometimes downright dopy awkwardness of butches. Like when they bump into walls when they see a pretty girl. My girlfriend knocked over my roommates entire DVD collection when she came to pick me up for our first date.

I have zero attraction to other femmes and none to men although I'm oddly heteroerotic--I bond to men and most of my close friends are straight men. I call myself a lesbian. I think the phrase lipstick lesbian is fucking stupid. It reminds me of the L word.

I'm not offended by the word queer but I don't often use it because I think it's an odd assessment of LGBT people. There's nothing 'queer' about me or at least about my relationship with my partner. I don't mind 'reclaimed terms' but I don't see much value in what it reclaims. I honestly wish that we could go back to using "gay" as an umbrella term.

Same-sex doesn't fit well either because she's pretty trans. I couldn't do that Kinsey report because I'm around too many transgendered to fully understand what "other sex" means. I also don't understand the term "bisexual" either because it sounds too much to me like "men and women only, no trannies".

Frankly, I hope that when we get equal rights with straights that the words straight and gay will simply disappear and there won't be this strange erotic cultural apartheid.

[dropkickpa]

30. I use bi

because, even in my past trans relationships, I go by what they identified as.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

37. i love the awkwardness of butch girls too. i also love the grace of high femmes.

this is partly why i identify as pansexual, i really am all over with attraction

[insleeforprez]

29. Gay man

Pretty simple...

[Rhythm]

32. Just your typical, run of the mill dyke...

'technically', i'm bisexual, but i am who i am, and i'm comfortable with that.

[DarkTirade]

35. but i am who i am, and i'm comfortable with that.

And that's the most important part of how you identify IMO. :)

[Rising Phoenix]

36. pansexual

as I have been attracted to men, women, and gender queer....people.....hell its the person not the sex....but I usually just say bi, beause most people I know don't know what pansexual is

[swimboy]

38. Gay man

I'm funny that way.

I'm happy with who and how I am. I was always gay but I had to become happy.

[baby_mouse]

39. Raving Queen, speeding irresistably through life to Camp Old Fruit.

And a Good Thing, Too! We're a dying race, us queens...

[readmoreoften]

40. Long Live the Queen!

I love me some queens.

[Rowdyboy]

41. "Queer" still makes me flinch....sorry, the 1960's were often ugly....I identify as a gay man/guy..

half of a gay couple.

[tjwmason]

42. Gay

Occasionally in a jocular sense I use "bent as a nine-bob note".

[qb]

43. Gay man

in love with a queen.

[BillSam]

44. I'm an Out and Proud Gay Man

and have been so for about 25 years. I am also a Bear -- or more specifically, an "otter," which is the term used to describe a slender bear.

If you really want to get technical, I'm a Jewish Author Tough Gay Activist Bear (JATGAB) -- the title of one of my blogs -- although some people call me "Dr. Bill:"

http://askgaydrbill.blogspot.com

[SarahB]

45. Bisexual. nt

[Marrah_G]

46. My opinion of myself has actually changed.

It's been a sort of weird journey. For a long time I considered myself bi-sexual. I'm no longer sure that fits me and here is why.

My daughter is bi-sexual (leaning more towards lesbian, she is still figuring herself out) and we have been talking alot. Not about sex, but about love and emotions. I came to realize that even though I've had intimate relations with women and enjoyed it and find women attractive, on a long term relationship level I always end up with a male. I don't see myself falling in love with a women in the same way I would fall in love with a man. Perhaps that is because I never met that right female match or maybe it's just not how I am wired.

It's amazing what your children can teach you. Just through talking about HER life, I learned much about my own.

I now consider myself mostly straight because I think the emotional level should match the physical level and I have yet to have come across that in my life.

I hope this makes some sense to everyone.