Feeling very conflicted - advice, opinions?

[teenagebambam]

A colleague and I have the same title. Colleague has been working here 17 years on a year-to-year contract, I have been working here 3 years, also year-to-year. Colleague, for various reasons, is soon to be bumped back to part-time, if not sent packing altogether. In my defense, I do have the edge in education (this is an educational environment and I have a terminal degree, colleague does not.)

To complicate matters, my S.O. is the supervisor of both of us. SO's supervisor is the one REALLY pushing the change, S.O. has tried to find a number of solutions so that Colleague could at least retain benefits, but big boss won't hear of it.

Both of us feeling very conflicted - the change will ultimately be what's best for the INSTITUTION, but obviously not for the colleague....and of course, we're just waiting for a formal charge of nepotism to come about. Gaaaaah!

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

1. Hope that your colleague can find something ele to do

that would be fulfilling for him so that he wants to leave. Perhaps you and your SO could visualize that happening.

[I Have A Dream]

2. Well, you said that SO's supervisor is the one pushing for it...

so nobody can honestly say that it's nepotism on the part of your SO. You also say that "for various reasons", so it seems that there are some legitimate reasons besides just subjective things.

There's no great solution here, but there's really nothing that you can do. I hope that something comes along for your colleague.

I hope that things go more smoothly than you fear, tabb. :hug:

[WhiteTara]

3. when a door closes in one place

another opens elsewhere. Sometimes we can only do what we need when we are pushed. It might not be as terrible for the colleague as you fear. Or of course, it may be worse :evilgrin:

[MorningGlow]

4. Documentation is paramount here

Depending on the other person's nature, s/he may very well file a complaint because your supervisor is your SO. Your SO should definitely have all of his/her ducks in a row to be able to show the reasons the colleague is going to be demoted or fired. In the meantime, keep your head down and let the SO handle it. If the big boss is behind it, then big boss should back up your SO. Still, it could get ugly. Send light, stay centered, and keep your shield up! Good luck. Let us know how it goes.

[southerncrone]

5. Since this is a dicey situation. It might be more appropriate for

SO's supervisor to do the actual demotion or termination. That takes care of any question of nepotism complaint.

I'd suggest SO speak to supervisor about such. If the colleague is inclined to sue company based on nepotism complaint this takes that off the table. Also eliminates any "uncomfortable & stained relations" between you & colleague, & colleague & immediate boss (SO), that might interfere with good work being done. This will benefit the company in the long run.

[teenagebambam]

6. Thanks for the positive thoughts

And, wow, they worked. Colleague came to S.O. today to apologize and say they would be happy to remain in a part-time capacity. S.O.'s boss shared some reasons for MY retention that are bigger than even I knew, and have nothing to do with my S.O. being my supervisor. Good all around, I think.

[I Have A Dream]

7. That''s wonderful news, tabb.

I'm so happy that things turned out so well. :)

Congratulations on being valued by your management. :thumbsup: