Enzyte Fraud Trial Set to Start

[TZ]

CINCINNATI - Executives of a company known for the "Smiling Bob" ads that promote "natural male enhancement" are set to go on trial in an 111-count indictment that accuses them of bilking $100 million from consumers.

Government lawyers have said they expect to call about 90 witnesses in a trial expected to take about a month in which company president Steven Warshak, his mother and four other employees of Berkeley Premium Nutraceuticals are accused of conspiracy to commit money laundering plus mail, wire and bank fraud.

Jury selection in U.S. District Court was scheduled to begin Tuesday.

Products made by Berkeley Nutraceuticals include vitamins, nutrients and Enzyte, a products whose television pitchman was a character called "Smiling Bob." The company claims Enzyte has 2 million users worldwide.
http://www.forbes.com/feeds/ap/2008/01/08/ap4507403.html
Outside of the obvious jokes to be made (more so if you actually saw these bizarre "Smiling Bob" commercials) imagine a "nutraceutical" company not being honest on what their useless crap does...
:rofl:

[Orrex]

1. Does this mean that I shouldn't believe all those emails they keep sending?

Honestly, I'm a bit surprised that they managed to get 90 witnesses.

Prosecution: Mr. Jones, please tell the court why you purchased Enzyte, and remember that you're under oath.

Mr. Jones: Well, I have a small...

[TZ]

2. ROFL

I wonder how much the actors in these ED commercials make? I always wondered how they could get men to do them (especially enzytes goofball commercials). Willing to bet none are really ED sufferers (well except for that old Bob Dole viagra ad, which was REALLY weird if you ask me)

[trotsky]

4. Hey, being in a commercial is a pretty good gig.

Can you say RESIDUALS? They play the hell out of Viagra and other ads. If I had a chance to appear in one, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Get another check in the mailbox every damn week!

[TZ]

7. I'd pay real money to see that..

An enzyte commercial featuring "Smiling Trotsky"..Course there are a lot of people here that would accuse you of being a big stiff anyway....
:evilgrin:

I kid!!I kid!!;-)

[trotsky]

9. "I'd pay real money to see that"

SEE?!? What'd I just tell ya? ;-)

I will just silently walk away from a "big stiff" joke. You have no idea how tempted I am, though. :evilgrin:

[moggie]

8. I wouldn't trust a Viagra ad with you in it

If I had to pick a DUer for a Viagra ad, it'd have to be Zeb: he radiates trustworthiness on the subject of sex.

[trotsky]

10. Just remember:

Missionary position ONLY, and lights OFF. Best Christian sex you will ever have.

Ah, Zeb's poor lover.

[moggie]

11. I'm reminded of an Onion article

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39100

As the sexual act wore on, Linda said it grew gloriously tolerable, describing the experience as "endurable beyond my wildest dreams." :rofl:

[moggie]

3. "... and I'm really gullible"

"I want to see Berkeley punished for this fraud, and a payout would help with this Nigerian deal I'm currently involved in..."

[lizerdbits]

6. It's easy to ignore them

when you DON'T HAVE A PENIS! I actually liked getting them because it was hilarious. I always wondered if that stuff really worked would I get a 2" clitoris? And would it get hard? Scientific minds want to know! :rofl:

[progressoid]

5. Uh Oh. Should I ignore this email I just received?

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