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dumb question here, but I do need advice....

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auntAgonist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-23-07 01:15 AM
Original message
dumb question here, but I do need advice....
Feb 23rd is / was my parent's wedding anniversary. Since my Mum had died I've not acknowledged this date as I used to when they were able to celebrate together. Should I be calling my Dad and wishing him a happy anniversary, or at the very least telling him I remember? What if this upsets him? What if I get upset? Is it best to just let it go?

yeah, me .. who has 'all the answers' for so many people and this one has me stumped.

:(

kesha.
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RevCheesehead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-23-07 01:44 AM
Response to Original message
1. That's not a dumb question at all!
I called my Dad on their anniversary (Dec. 19), and told him I was keeping him especially close in prayer. I also reminded him that the love lasts, because "love is stronger than death." He, of course, knows all this... but he was really touched that I remembered and called.

Hugs to you, Kesha. :hug:
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pecwae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-23-07 02:05 PM
Response to Original message
2. Not at all dumb
I think I would call and let him know that I remember the significance of the date and let him take it from there. Personally, I appreciate it when my son's birth and death dates are remembered, especially within family. Otherwise, I feel like everyone has forgotten him but me.

What do you think your Dad would truly like in this case? You'll do exactly the right thing. That's the type of person you are.

:hug:
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pecwae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-24-07 08:24 AM
Response to Original message
3. How are you doing?
You were in my thoughts yesterday. I hope you and your Dad did what served you best and got you through the day. Anniversary dates are very difficult. Kesha, we're here for you.

:hug: :hug:
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auntAgonist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-24-07 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
4. update: I called (Thanks Rev and Pecwae)
my Dad and he was very happy to hear from me. I didn't mention the anniversary right away, preferring to chit chat for a couple of minutes. The I said, "well Dad, today would have been 56 years since you and Mum got married, and I just wanted you to know that even although Mum's not here it's still YOUR anniversary and I wanted to let you know I'm thinking about both of you!" SILENCE. Then a soft Thank You. We talked about how time flies and how he misses my Mum and then we spoke about other family members who've passed on. It was a really nice conversation, full of memories and chuckles. I'm glad I called. I was afraid I'd upset him and I don't handle tears well at all. He was happy I remembered and so was I. :)


Thanks to both of you, Rev and Pecwae for your thoughts and advice.
:grouphug:

I knew I could count on this group for support.


kesha.
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RevCheesehead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-24-07 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. That's wonderful!
I'm so glad you called, too. :hug:
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pecwae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-24-07 04:00 PM
Response to Reply #4
6. That's so good to hear!
I'm glad for you both. This will be one of those conversations you'll hold in your heart, and dearly, for a long time to come.

:hug:
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