http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/George_W._Bush a quote from the site:
"You know, it's hard work to try to love her as best as I can, knowing full well that the decision I made caused her loved one to be in harm's way"
~ George W. Bush on war
more from the site:
As a kid, Georgie wanted to be an panda, and when he grew up, little did he know that he became Cheney's. Not unlike Jesus, we know very little about Georgie's early life apart from the fact that his wife used to beat him with whips and chains. We only know that he single-handedly (AWOL in military jargon) saved the Divided States (United then) from VCs during the last stage of the Vietnam War in Texas. After the loss of Baghdad, U.S. troops failed miserably in Vietnam, thanks to a coward named Geraldo Rivera. Billions of North Vietnamese terrorists crossed the Yalu River, ready to rent their cars from Alamo. Georgie, brave warrior, took his airplane to heaven and dropped thunder and lightening upon them. He saved America in five fateful minutes.
After returning from military service he joined his brothers Jeb and Cletus in the short-lived band The Beverley Sisters Hill-Billies, in which he played the jugs to all manner of songs by the Beverley Sisters, most of which had critical acclaim. Following the break-up of the band he entered a life of humble political service, starting as a dictator in Texas.