Top 10 Reasons Why You Should Never Give a Republican a Gun

[mtnsnake]

Fellow DU'ers, please help me out with the last reason. I could only come up with nine ;)

#10..They can't tell the difference between a 200 pound person and a 1 pound bird.

#9....They think that bird shot is the same as bird seed.

#8....They're not responsible enough to shoot anything more dangerous than an unloaded water pistol.

#7....They think that shooting a lawyer will make for funny future lawyer jokes.

#6....They always get "a government by the people, for the people" mixed up with "kill the people".

#5....They think the best way around gun control is by shooting a lawyer or two.

#4....They don't know that it's a hunting violation to shoot a person who doesn't have antlers.

#3....They think that sending kids off to a war that's based on lies makes you "an experienced hunter".

#2....They can't hear well under pressure. "Don't shoot! It's a lawyer!" sounds NOTHING like "Shoot, you fat LIAR!!"

.....and the #1 reason why you should NEVER give a Republican a gun is...............

[zanne]

1. I don't have any suggestions, but...

I LOVE #6!

[slor]

2. Because they will load the gun with bullets...

and load your head with lies, and then send you to Iraq. I know, kind of weak, but I tried.

[YOY]

3. The 2nd Amendment is the only one they care about, how better to piss

them off?

[BushOut06]

4. #1 - Guns don't kill people, Republicans do. - n/t

[Dhalgren]

5. The number one reason that you never give a gun to a

Republican is - because they are simply too fucking stupid.

[mtnsnake]

10. I like that

Even Republicans will be able to understand that one!

[masshole]

6. Because they make no distinction

between Pheasants and peasants. They believe both are only here on God's green Earth for their amusement.

[valerief]

7. Both Republicans and their guns are usually loaded

[5X]

8. We have a winner.

You are cordially invited to a weekend getaway
with our illustrious Vice President for a fun
time in the field. Bring double ot buck.

[valerief]

9. Thank you, but I ought to slap you with switchgrass for that prize

[mtnsnake]

11. Now THAT is funny!

[valerief]

12. I wonder if Letterman will use it tonight

[mtnsnake]

13. haha, you can bet on one thing...

I'm going to be watching Letterman on one hand, and taping Leno on the other...or vice versa. These guys are going to go all out tonight...and for the rest of the week, too, as long as Witthington's life isn't in jeopardy.