Morford: "Obese American Tourists, Ho!"

[Yollam]

After reading this sneering piece by The San Francisco Chronicle's Mark Morford, I didn't quite know how I felt about it.

While it's clear that as a nation we have an obesity problem, whose causes Morford touches on, I'm not sure I like his premise that San Francisco is some island of health floating in a sea of flab.

He ridicules people from flyover country for having "1994 haircuts", "mullets", "fanny packs", etc. etc. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I read an article in a major paper that was so snotty and immature. Who cares if inland folks are less-than-cutting edge? I live here in San Francisco, and must take exception with his characterization of this city as being full of nothing but lithe, toned, yoga-practicing spiritualists. I have seen plenty of people so obese that they have to ride on those little scooter things here. At the McDonald's at Haight & Stanyan, you can see a collection of people with WAY too many unsanitary-looking piercings, scab-covered meth addicts, people with dreads so filthy, you wish you could wash your eyes after looking at them - any day of the week. Maybe everybody is beautiful and happy in the trendy Hayes valley neighborhood Morford lives in, but I see plenty of people on the Muni everyday who look neither healthy nor happy. Maybe it's paying $1500 to rent a 400 sq. foot studio that's bringing them down...

And since he singles out white, middle-class folks in his piece, I would point out that whites are a minority in this city, slightly outnumbered by Asians, who are well-known for their trimmer, smaller frames. And if you look at the demographics of the whites that are here, they tend to skew younger and gayer than in most cities.

And Mr. Morford, have you ever raised kids? Because I can tell you, I found it much easier to keep trim when I was single, reading the right indie papers, going to the coffee houses, pretending to be hip. Raising a family changes priorities and fitness often takes a back seat.

As I've detailed in posts in the Lounge, I've personally been battling back from obesity and have lost 50 lbs so far. I hope everybody can be fitter and feel better, wherever they're from. I just don't see how some some snotty column by a single, childless writer living the trendy life in an insular burg like San Francisco is going to help them do it.

Anyway, here's his little column. See what you think of it.




Obese American Tourists, Ho!

One vacation to the Baja coast is all you need to see the staggering downfall of the country



By Mark Morford, SF Gate Columnist
Wednesday, February 22, 2006

I have seen deep azure seas and delicious star-addled skies and crazily overdressed mariachi bands playing "La Cucaracha" for drunken tourists so many times in one night the poor bass player looked like he wanted to be shot.

I have seen the classic American mullet and the epic Mexican mullet, both shockingly alive and well and for some ungodly reason flourishing like angry time-warp ferrets on the heads of beefy simpleminded men so utterly lost to time and space they should be in some sort of institution. I mean, my God.

I have seen white tube socks with brown sandals, dark tube socks with white tennis shoes, the unholy and relentless use of fanny packs with terrifying Jesus-themed T-shirts, big gnarly dudes from Midwestern Screwyouland wearing giant Harley-Davidson muscle shirts tucked way, way into high-waisted denim shorts (true), walking around the pool and smoking Marlboros and sucking in their massive bellies and trying to look as if they weren't as confused and discomfited as a water buffalo on the moon.

I have seen more awful tattoos on more sunburned sacra of more terribly drunk blank-eyed 20-something girl-women than your average Jenna Bush sorority pool party. I have witnessed the wide-eyed tourist throngs flooding in from the massive cruise ships anchored just off the Baja coast, tumbling onto land with their bright name tags and their 1994 haircuts and their cruise-ship logo hats to buy Mexican trinkets and have their pictures taken with a large exhausted iguana in a tiny sombrero.

[madaboutharry]

1. You're a better writer than Morford!

I love your post.

[Yollam]

2. Thanks - I usually like him.

His sophomoric qualities usually add charm to his hyperbole-laden pieces. Sometimes, I feel like he is San Francisco's own liberal Dave Barry.

But this piece just rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe it's because I'm overweight and originally from flyover country myself.

Just goes to show that even mostly progressive, intellectual folks from the big city could stand to learn a few things, too.

[Mythsaje]

7. At least Dave Barry is FUNNY n/t

[Child_Of_Isis]

3. I second that.

I thought the article was quite sad. Can you imagine living in the writers shallow visioned, judgemental head? How fun can it be walking around placing judgement on everyone? I think it would be painful to have to live like that.

[Bunny]

4. You poke fun of my fanny pack, and I will FUCK YOU UP!

Whew, sorry about that. I guess I got a little violent.

I didn't read the article, other than your excerpt. But I'm familiar with the sneering, scornful, hipper-than-thou attitude and it's despicable. I can't stand that air of superiority, it usually conveys the exact opposite of what the writer intends, in my opinion.

Oh, and while I've never had a fe-mullet, I do on occasion wear a fanny pack. It's convenient for holding everything I may need on a trip to the mall, street fair, etc. Much easier to deal with that instead of dragging my purse all over the goddamn place. I know it looks silly, and frankly I don't give a rat's ass.

Oh yeah, and I'm overweight too. So anyone who wants to make sport of it can kiss my big fat fanny-packin' ass.

[Arugula Latte]

5. I used to be young and single and slightly hip and living in San Francisco

*sigh* those were the days ...

Now I'm not so judgmental!!!

[Arugula Latte]

14. But, let me say, I have been to Mexico a few times and I understand

what Morford is getting at ... For me, though, it' not that most of the Americans there are chubby to obese, it's that so many of them act like the stereotypical ugly American -- ordering the Mexican locals around in loud voices, making no effort to understand the culture, being obnoxious ... it is truly shudder-inducing.

[Katherine Brengle]

6. I actually really like Mark Morford--

I didn't hop over to SFGate to read the rest of the piece yet, but my guess would be that he is just doing what he always does--pointing out a specific issue and then having fun with it.

Clearly, this is not a guy who worries much about offending anyone, lol. So in that vein, I think everything he says (and especially how he says it) should be taken with the proverbial grain of salt.

[Gormy Cuss]

8. "Snotty" was my one word reaction to it.

There is an element of the 'SFisthecoolestplaceontheplanetandyou'renotcoolenoughtobeamongus' attitude that I sometimes encounter in the city. Morford is very funny and edgy in his columns but he wrote this one after too many cups of extra-dark roast espresso sipped in an overly cool Marina or SOMA cafe.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

9. Wow

he is just too cool to be believed.

I once had an acquaintance tell me (I am obese) that two things he would never do is get fat and wear polyester. Well, I saw Mr. Natural Fibers about ten years later and he was VERY fat. No polyester, though. One for two isn't bad, I guess.

We need to start appreciating each other for our cultural differences. And yes, that includes nascar and mullets and country music. There are no inherently bad cultural traits and to think there are, is to me, juvenile and insular..kind of like Bryant Gumbel not understanding that the rest of the world doesn't play basketball, but might even enjoy winter sports.

[Der Blaue Engel]

10. Thanks for the link

I thought the article was brilliant. :shrug:

[formerrepuke]

11. If he keeps seeing these disagreeable 'slobs' ..then maybe he's

been hanging out in the wrong places. I hear St Tropez is pretty exclusive.

[cliss]

12. Yollam, that's a very good post.

Well-written.

Whew, that was an unusually hostile article. I wonder if Mr. Morford realizes that those "fat tubs of lard" are in fact keeping the Mexican economy going. What would happen to these tourist resorts if there was no one there to pay the hotel rooms, restaurants, catamaran rides etc etc.

Plus, these "big sized" people probably order big meals, so the restaurants do extra good business.

These people are probably pretty humble; in contrast to Mr. Morford. I can tell you who I'd rather vacation with....

[melody]

13. Other nationalities are fatter than we are and anyway who cares?

Canadians actually slightly outweigh us. The Australians equal us. The data everyone quotes came from a study in which US weights were determined via doctor's weigh-ins and Canadians were taken at their word on what their weight was.

What should be obvious -- to anyone with a soul anyway -- is that obesity is a very complex issue which has much to do with ethnicity. Enfamined cultures who come to the west tend to produce more fat people because their bodies have adjusted overtime to do more on less -- the basic process of evolution.

We have more Scots-Irish, poor English, African and (naturally) American Indian populations than any other. Therefore, we have a lot of fat people.

I think the writer ought to see about getting his heart replaced. The one he has is non-functional.

[radwriter0555]

15. Anyone who actually loves Mexico avoids Baja, since it really *isn't*

Mexico, it's just a nasty appendage of San Diego.

There is a specific demographic that gets on cruise ships to baja, and who subjects themselves to such fashion crimes.... and I prefer to avoid them. The book denotes the cover.

I can't identify with the DNA of people who volunterily performs such actions.

[SpiralHawk]

16. My Reliably Infallible (TM) Prophecy

Mullets will make a comeback

They will be cool again

Some day in the distant future on a distant planet

[Batgirl]

17. I love how near the end he reassures his readership

who he evidently assumes must be quaking in their boots at his description of these beastly Flyover People, that even though their fear is understandable, they really should just pity them. Like an anthroplogist filing a report on some bizarre strain of humans discovered on a remote uncharted continent. "Massive weight, of course, has little to do with personality" -- whew! thanks for the reassurance. "Don't worrry, they may look weird, disgusting and even dangerous, but appearances can be deceiving. So calm down folks, it's probably just an unfounded rumor that they are functionally retarded and practice cannibalism."

He's usually pretty funny and he does get in a few good zingers here, but most of the humor seems to be inadvertent.

[Yollam]

18. "Hi, I'm Mark."

"My farts don't stink and I'll never be fat or old."