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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:37 PM
Original message
Taking Mom and Dad to Your Interview
I saw this article in the Post Gazette last week and I nearly fell out of my chair.

I would not hire anyone who wasn't able to handle something as important as finding a job and interviewing without their parent. Call me crazy but I think that a future employee whose parent interferes with their job interviewing process and even calls to negotiate a better wage for their kid is not someone I would want around.

http://www.careerjournal.com/columnists/workfamily/20060317-workfamily.html

"....At Pella Corp., Christine Headington-Hall, strategic staffing manager of the Pella, Iowa, maker of windows and doors, has begun hearing from job candidates' parents too, trying to renegotiate an offer or asking why their child didn't get one. "That's something I haven't faced in 15 years" in the recruiting field, she says. And upon getting an offer at Vanguard Group, seven out of 10 college recruits say, "'Let me talk to my parents. I'll get back to you,'" says Karen Fox, college relations and recruiting manager.

Figuring they can't beat the trend, some employers are joining it. Ferguson Enterprises, a Newport News, Va., building-supplies distributor, last year started offering to send a copy of recruits' offer letters to their parents, says Denise Francum, director of recruiting; "more than half of them say yes." And PNC Financial Services Group invites students' parents to some recruiting events, says Davie Huddleston, vice president, human resources.

In many ways, parents are continuing the intense oversight this generation has been known for all along: challenging poor grades, negotiating with coaches and helping kids register for college. Heavy cellphone and email contact with teens through college is fueling parent involvement beyond the normal breaking-away years; a study at Middlebury College, Middlebury, Vt., set for release at an August meeting of the American Psychological Association, found college freshmen are in contact with their parents more than 10 times a week."

My kids are in elementary school and I already know which parents will be the type to go on an interview or grill an employer about why Jr wasn't good enough for an offer and these parents typically are raising a child to be a self-centered, selfish brat with no handle on reality.

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patrice Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:42 PM
Response to Original message
1. Hold on now, aren't the parents those lousy Boomers?
or Children of the 60s? What's this "In many ways, parents are continuing the intense oversight this generation has been known for all along: challenging poor grades, negotiating with coaches and helping kids register for college."?

Parents are the ones young adults can talk over EVERY aspect of a job. There's nothing you can't talk/think about with them and that's what you need to do when considering a job.
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. are you saying it is okay for people to bring parents to an interview
and have these same parents actively negotiate with the future employer?

Now it is natural to ask a parent for advice but I think having a parent come along for the ride is really nutso.
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patrice Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:48 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. No, just commenting on those who want to talk an offer over with a parent.
*Of Course* it is stupid to have parents actively involved in the job process itself.:crazy:
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SharonAnn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:08 PM
Response to Reply #1
11. Nope, we're the grandparents.
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:46 PM
Response to Original message
3. My kids would KILL me
if I interfered with what they are doing. They would have complained bitterly if I had done this when they were in High School. I know many kids whose parents have moved to the city that their kids moved to to go to college. I simply can't imagine it. My kids are doing fine and I want them to be able to do fine if something happens to their father and I. Man oh man, this is very odd to me.
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:49 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. i agree it is odd...really odd...
how will these so called young adults ever cope if mom or dad dies?

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Warpy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:48 PM
Response to Original message
5. Not surprised at all here
because this is the generation of kids whose parents both had to work long hours and who were therefore overscheduled every waking moment of their lives to keep them busy at supervised activities rather than at home seeing if the dog would fit when they flushed the toilet.

These kids can't wipe their asses without a parent or a coach or an instructor of some type telling them how many pieces of toilet paper to use.
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:53 PM
Response to Reply #5
9. I was a latch key kid...
mom was widowed and when I turned 13...I got to babysit my brother (he was actually only a year younger) and make dinner after school...

both my husband and I work..but we don't overschedule our kids and we teach them self reliance for activities...just the other day my son was bitching why I won't pour his milk or get his drinks anymore...I told him..."you are tall enough and strong enough to do it for yourself"..
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. The moment my boys
were old enough and capable enough to do their own laundry they did it. They could cook (kind of) for themselves and when they left home they were ready to do their own finances and everything needed to be complete and competent citizens. It was a lot of work but I always thought that was what you were supposed to do. I did have to resist the urge to hover, I really wanted to hover, it was hard not to hover but I knew it would do them no good if I did.

Now we have wonderful relationships and act as advisors if they ask. I guess it was the way I grew up that made me mother that way. I have nothing against those that don't but it did work for us. We all have our own ways but the hovering really does not help the kids at all IMO.
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Chiyo-chichi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:51 PM
Response to Original message
7. Isn't this
an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond?
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. never watched the show....
was there something about this issue?
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KatieW Donating Member (101 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #7
14. There was an episode similar to that on the show.
Robert was trying to get a job with the FBI. If I remember the episode correctly, his mom sent a letter to the FBI as a way of sabotaging Robert's chances. She thought the job was too dangerous. She later goes and meets with the person who interviewed Robert, trying to get the guy to hire him. Funny episode, and I'm sure my description here doesn't do it justice.
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Chiyo-chichi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:53 PM
Response to Reply #14
16. Marie: I was only trying to help!
Robert: 'Help'? What, like the guy who shaves your ankles before the electric chair? Is that the kinda help? (yelling) Thanks for the help! What do I owe ya?
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bumblebee1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
8. I couldn't imagine doing something like that.
I can't even imagine taking my husband to a job interview.
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eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:12 PM
Response to Original message
12. I suspect people will be showing up for the first day of law-school
orientation with parents in tow. There were enough there during the open house I attended.

I can count the number of times my parents have run interference between me and an employer or higher-education professor...on no hands. And I think my dad helped me challenge a grade once in my life, in junior high.

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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-30-06 02:17 PM
Response to Original message
15. There was a scholarship interview yesterday
For a very hefty local academic scholarship.
I fully expect half of the parents to go nuts if their child doesn't receive the scholarship.
They don't understand why one child that has a 4.0 GPA and ACT score of 30 trumps their child with a 3.5 GPA and ACT score of 23.
It truly doesn't compute.
When we first moved here, my daughter was ranked #1 in the class when they ranked them. The parents of the former #1 student were in the office protesting grades until they changed some grades to put her back in #1.
I fully expect houses to be burned down when the scholarship results come in.
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