Reverse migration: The difficult journey of two retirees from Florida back home

[Roland99]

http://www.marketwatch.com/news/story/difficult-journey-two-retirees-florida/story.aspx?guid=%7BA3178445%2DA767%2D44D8%2D819A%2D084913CB76EE%7D

For every 1,000 people age 65 and older who "retire" to Florida, there are about 481 that leave. My father and my stepmother will soon be among those 481 -- provided my siblings and I can come up with a plan.

...

One has to find a place to relocate. In the case of my father and stepmother, there are several choices -- none of them ideal. They could move in with family, though that would mean one of my sisters would have to retrofit their house to accommodate my father. In addition, we would likely have to chip in to hire home health aides at a cost of $22 an hour in Rhode Island to help my father with his daily living activities.

They might be able to find housing for the elderly in a town in Rhode Island, though there's often a long waiting list. For instance, there are about 260 units in the town they want to live in and, according to a 2003 report, some 160 on the waiting list. That means they would have to stay in Florida, far away from family and friends, for about two or three years until they got to the top of the list.

In addition, they would have to time the sale of their condo in Florida with getting to the top of the elderly housing list. That -- it should go without saying -- seems like a disaster waiting to happen.

Much more at the link on the difficulties in moving family back home from Florida when health is a major concern.

[Warpy]

1. The alternative is to do it long distance, which is what I did

with unannounced visits to check up on the home care services they are receiving, plus visits with case workers and the like to discuss future needs, plus visits to the local gimp store for assistive equipment like shower grab bars, shower seats, bedside commodes, and other aids for people who are finding it more and more difficult to get around the house; plus cleaning services, something my dad resisted almost to the end of his life.

I was lucky in that my dad outlived my mother and kept all his marbles until he died. He was also fairly active and he was still able to drive, although he needed to use a grocery cart as a rolling walker when he got where he was going.

It's not an easy thing to do, but my own feeling was that the best thing I could do for them was to preserve as much of their independence as I could. It helped that I was an RN and good at anticipating needs.

Every case is different. Some of my friends have moved to be with ailing parents. Some have moved ailing parents in with them, or nearby in apartments. Some have done it all long distance.

[AnneD]

4. One of the perks....

of being a Nurse is that you are not totally clueless about this. Mom and I spoke about living wills last month.

[Tikki]

2. And even now in our earliest 60's we are....

thinking about the possibility of this:
http://www.healthdecisions.org/LTC/News/default.aspx?doc_id=130206

Our children live in So Cal so it might not be a stretch for them to
visit or make it to where we might be when we are in need of them.



The Tikkis

[Roland99]

3. My Dad turned 65 this year. Looks and acts 50, though, so I'm hoping I have lots of time...

before I have to start worrying about how to care for him.

But, I really should do something now.

[DemReadingDU]

5. I wonder how many who retired to Florida

and moving back to their previous state (or a state to be nearer to their children), I wonder if many have regrets, and wished they hadn't moved at all. It gets harder and harder as people get older and older...health issues, different doctors, outliving friends.