Idiot sighting in America

[Ichingcarpenter]

A site where people report idiots in our common daily lives
Here are a few, I really like the Homeland security airport experience.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate, when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That’s why we ask."

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.


IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker: she was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it’s open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side."

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi








link: http://emailfromgrandma.com/2008/02/15/idiot-sighting/

[BlueJac]

1. To funny........

Thanks I needed a good laugh after reading the home page!

[hootinholler]

6. !

:rofl:

-Hoot

[Mabus]

2. Idiocracy

Last year I was driving through western Oklahoma. I was headed to my grandmother's funeral and I as I was driving on a narrow, two lane road behind some farm equipment (a combine) when I noticed I was almost on empty. I was one of about six cars behind the combine and the drive was becoming mind-numbingly slow. I pulled up to the first gas station I saw.

I was kind of looking for any excuse to pull over and get out of line for a while and because I wasn't sure when I would see another gas station. I walked in the little store to prepay (as instructed by the handwritten sign on the pump) when the attendant told me I would have to turn my car around because it was facing the wrong way. I pointed out that the gas tank was facing the pump but he insisted that the car was facing the wrong way and therefore the pump wouldn't work.

My brother was with me and had stayed in the car. I walked to the door and asked him if he could put the hose in the tank. He did. Because he didn't know what was going on in the store, he tried to pump some gas and yelled back that it wasn't working. I looked at the attendant but he kept insisting that my car was facing the wrong way so the pump wouldn't work. I told him that the pump wasn't working because he wouldn't turn it on. He said he couldn't turn it on until I turned my car around. My car had to point west, otherwise, he repeated again, the pump wouldn't work.

Since I was almost out of gas, I had a bit of headache and wasn't sure when I would see another gas station, I asked my brother to turn the car around. He looked at me like I had lost my mind but he did it. Once the car was facing westward the attendant flipped the switch (or hit the button) and said I could put gas in the car now. I went out, stretched the hose over the car to get it to the tank and then began putting gas in the the car (mumbling under my breathe the entire time)It was, and remains, one of the most incredibly stupid incidents in my life. When I got in the car I told my brother what happened and we had a really good laugh. We then headed on to grandma's funeral.

When I was in the store and he was telling me that the car was faced the wrong way, all I wanted to do was reach over the counter and slap him. I don't know if he was doing it because it is what he honestly believed; if he did it because he didn't like Indians; if he did it because he didn't know any better; or if he was just fucking with me because I am a woman.

[lisainmilo]

3. That was good!

:rofl:

[annabanana]

4. rec # 5 because we can use the laughs!. . .n/t

[radfringe]

5. the "helpless" desk

back in october we received a rate increase from Comcast cable, along with the notice was a deal for $2 more a month we could get the movies on demand

we went to the comcast area in our area, signed up for the on-demand, got the box, the remote and all the instructions.

I hooked everything up, cable was working fine, but not the ON-Demand

over the next two weeks, we made numerous calls to the 'helpless desk', had a technician out at the house who ran all new cable.

on-demand worked ONCE.

Idiocy: one person on the helpless desk told us the signal came over the air, like wireless or the radio and it must be overcast where we live and that's why we were unable to get a signal.

gee I wonder why we needed a cable to go from the street into the house and connect it to the box/tv? and if it was wireless and cloudy out - why were we getting the regular cable stations and not the on-demand?

the last straw was when we finally got a manager on the line - after a half-hour of back and forth, nothing resolved, still no ON-DEMAND working - the idiot says he'll give us credit for free on-demand for 6 months....

:wtf: they could give us free on-demand for life and it wouldn't do any good because we weren't able to get it working!!!!!!

that week we signed up with DISH-TV, thursday night the dish was up and we were watching TV. Next day we went to the cable office to drop off the box/remote and cancel the service

we walk in and the woman behind the counter asks "Still having problems?"

my partner plunks the box on the counter, smiles and says "Nope - WE GOT DISH-TV, here's your equipment, I want to cancel my account"

[LiberalEsto]

7. My idiot sighting

I was walking toward my polling place from the parking lot. Standing just outside the restricted zone was some man with posters and fliers warning us that transsexuals were trying to invade ladies' restrooms and showers because of some quirk in a county anti-bias law.

This same group, NotMyShower, is trying to whip up fear and bigotry all over our county with petition campaigns and robo-calls about this issue.


Obviously the shower nuts have too much time and money on their hands. Maybe they should try being real Christians and use all this money and energy to help the poor.

[irish.lambchop]

8. Idiot sighting in Ireland . . .

An Irishman sitting at the bar in a pub in Dublin was, obviously, completely drunk - mumbling to himself and non-existent mates - not an uncommon sight. An American couple asked me if I thought he was possibly suffering from delusions from fighting in Viet Nam. I said most likely as there were an enormous contingent of Irish that fought in Viet Nam, to which they just nodded their agreement. Unbelievable!

[Ikonoklast]

9. I am NOT going to tell you then the discussion I had

With a certain moran that the 'Republicans' started the revolution for an Ireland free of British rule.

He just could not understand that Irish Republicans weren't right wing assholes just like him.

[irish.lambchop]

10. Oh . . .

you MUST tell me now! May I assume that this person thought the Republic of Ireland were 'republicans'?

[Ikonoklast]

11. I got a really bad headache trying to explain it

I tried to tell him that a country, say, "The Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea" wasn't founded by Republicans, nor had any vaguely Democratic ideals involved with governance.

I got close when I told him that Sinn Fein was the founding political party responsible (mostly) for Irish freedom, but he said that they were justa bunch of commies.

I gave up and ordered another Harp. His stupid was beating me down.

[irish.lambchop]

15. In that situation

only a Jameson followed by a pint of Guinness will do! I bet the only other bit he knew about Ireland was that we drive on the "wrong" side of the road, but kudos to you for trying! It is much more than I would have done.

[HCE SuiGeneris]

12. I think I was at the Texas Instruments "party" back in 2004!

And, they granted that manager their wishes...

Those are great!

K & R

[Ichingcarpenter]

13. Idiot sighting in China

[irish.lambchop]

16. BRILLIANT!!!

I'd not seen that photo! Either the door was locked or he just shit his pants!

[Ichingcarpenter]

14. Idiot sighting in Germany

[Initech]

17. Idiot sighting at the airport

[nickyt]

18. Years ago, my sister went to buy some chicken wire at a hardware store for an art

project she was working on. She asked the clerk if she could buy "Three feet of chicken wire, please." The clerk replied, "I'm sorry m'am, we only sell chicken wire by the yard." She drew a deep breath and said, "May I have one yard of chicken wire, please?"

[Contrary1]

19. Unfortunately, I have a new Idiot Sighting experience

in the form of questions every time my sister-in-law comes around. (She's in her 50's)

My personal favorite:

Do I need to cook fresh chicken before I put it in chicken salad?

[GoneOffShore]

20. Idiot sighting in Canada

Friend of mine lives in Ottawa - She owns what looks to be an ankle length fur coat but is actually faux-fur. She was in the Ontario equivalent of 7Eleven one day when the girl behind the counter commented on the coat.
"That's nice, eh. What kind of fur is it?"
"Oh this? It's a northern Orlon."
"Northern Orlon, eh? I'm going to ask my boyfriend to get me one of those."
My friend barely made it out the door before collapsing in helpless laughter.

[Ichingcarpenter]

21. Good one

A medical student was working in the toxicology department at the poison control center.
A woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants.
The medical student quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful
and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital.

She calmed down, and at the end of the conversation happened to mention
that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. The student told the mother that she better bring her daughter in to the emergency room right away.

True story.

[sce56]

22. Idiot sighting in Africa

[TheMightyFavog]

23. Two idiot sightings.

I was in a writing for visual media class in college, and our professor was covering writing for corporate video. He showed us a number of examples, including a recruiting video made for an all-women's college somewhere in Kentucky back in the mid 90s. Keep in mind that the recruiting video was for an all women's institution. At one point the video was touting the leadership opportunities at this college by saying, "unlike most colleges where women occupy about 40% of student leadership, here at (insert name of this particular women's college whose name escapes me at the moment), 100% of all student leadership postions are filled by women."


Secondly, a columnist in our weekly local paper. She's a right wing fundie Catholic and has also drank the climate change denial koolaid.

Once, she stated that parents should make their kid's Halloween costum,es out of synthetic fibers like polyester because "They don't burn as easily." Secondly in a column about heavy metal toxicity in fish, she stated that Mercury was dangerous "because it has so much Lead in it."