Despite sex scandals, wives often stand by their men

[CatWoman]

On Monday, New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer appeared with his wife Silda (but not their three daughters) at a press conference in which he apologized to his family and to the public, although he never said what for.

It turns out it was for getting caught with a hooker named Kristen. And Silda Spitzer became the latest in a very, very long line of wives who have stood next to their husbands at press conferences about sexual indiscretions. Here are a few of many in this Hall of Shame.

"I'm a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary," Wendy Vitter once said. "If he does something like that, I'm walking away with one thing, and it's not alimony, trust me." She was talking about her husband, Sen. David Vitter (R-La.). When he admitted sex with a prostitute in 2007, however, she stood by his side at the press conference.

Earlier this year, Carlita Kilpatrick appeared with her husband, Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, when he apologized about an affair with an aide. "Yes, I am angry, I am hurt and I am disappointed," she said. "But there is no question that I love my husband."

In 2007, Suzanne Craig appeared at a press conference, wearing large sunglasses, alongside her husband, Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) after he had pleaded guilty to soliciting an undercover policeman in an airport bathroom. "I am not gay," Craig said.

http://www.ajc.com/living/content/living/stories/2008/03/11/wivesweb.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab

[nomorenomore08]

1. Well, after all, he's just a man. And I say that as a dude.

nt

[wuushew]

2. What explains this behavior?

:shrug:

Compassion, shell shock,political equivalent of cutting yourself to feel good?

[ProdigalJunkMail]

5. some people believe that that their marriages are about more than sex

and when a partner fails them in that area, it needs work, but is NOT a motivation to leave. Some people bail for less than this, but it depends on what vows they took, what they think of those vows, and what they feel the response to breaking those vows should be. Heck, some people stick around in much worse marriages for money or other 'conveniences'.

The thing is, we don't know why in most cases, and who are we to judge them?

sP

[CatWoman]

10. such a wonderful, rational post

:)

[ProdigalJunkMail]

12. too bad I am full of bunk :-)

i know my wife has stood by me through lots of stuff (not infidelity, though) and i have stood by her through her stuff. so far...we're doing alright...and that is all we need :-)

sP

[CatWoman]

7. I think it's one of two things

1. she really, really does love him, and as such, is willing to forgive and/or

2. she doesn't want to lose her status in life.

[trumad]

3. This picture is too funny not to post..... LOL

[CatWoman]

9. ahhhhhh

Tru is BACK!!!! :rofl:

:hi:

[guitar man]

4. all is explained here

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Ve4ZePjSIE

:D

[CatWoman]

11. LOLOL!!!!

:rofl:

that was one of the best bits in that movie :)

[devilgrrl]

6. Of course they do - they know where the money is.

:popcorn:

[ProdigalJunkMail]

8. you're gonna ruin my dinner...pass the popcorn :-) n/t

[elfin]

13. Her lawyer probably told her that showing up gives her leverage

in the final settlement -- WHYEVER would she do this??

As far as is published - it is his FAMILY that has the "real" money -- if standing dumbly by gets her the gold -- I say go for it.

Otherwise -- she has been duped,

UNLESS she, had previously acquiesced to his extramarital behavior to assuage his sexual desires , which could not be satisfied within the marriage.

[WitchyWoman57]

14. So sad...

I was struck by how incredibly sad she looked standing there next to him at yesterday's press conference. I love my husband of 28 years, but I don't think I would have done what she did. He'd have to work damned hard to make it up to me before I would get anywhere near him after something like that.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

16. she just looked devastated...

it was awfully soon to be seen in that sort of scenario...i know i would likewise have to work very hard to win my wife back...i don't think she would leave (well, if i blew $80K that would indicate a pattern that probably WOULD cause her to leave) but she sure as heck wouldn't be standing there while i had that presser...

sP

[Mike03]

15. In politcs, Yes. In the entertainment industry, No. NT

[CatWoman]

17. The entertainment industry is not the norm, IMHO

[ProdigalJunkMail]

18. wait...i thought politics WAS entertainment n/t

[Mike03]

19. No, that's for sure. NT

[ScreamingMeemie]

20. Small personal story... In 2001, after a horrendous miscarriage, my

husband told me he was going to get a vasectomy. I begged him not to. I pleaded to just leave the option open until I had fully gotten over it. He scheduled the appt. for two weeks after the D&C. I told him, that morning, that if he went through with it, I might not be there when he got back. I threw myself at his knees, vulnerable. He left anyway, and had it done. While he was gone, I realized I could not leave him even though I disagreed with and downright hated his actions. I still loved him. I'm glad I did what I did.

We used to have conversations about cheating and my thoughts were always along the maybe I could forgive him for a one night stand, but an affair, with time and feelings involved, would be another issue. I am not sure if I would have held to that if he had had a one night stand (which he did not), but I like to think that I would.

End point is that what a woman decides to do when faced with marital problems i.e. infidelity, is that woman and her spouse's decision. And we can't judge that. That is a personal issue.

[joeybee12]

22. Very, very true...we don't know these two people at all...

...it's their decision to make, and I can't help thinking that the 3 daughters figures in somehow...regardles of what Silda Spitzer is thinking and feeling, she knows that the daughters are also involved and wants to protect them.

[CatWoman]

23. Mrs. G

so very nice to see you!!

:hi:

:hug:

[ConcernedCanuk]

21. Men have been ruled by their "little brains" for millenniums. - This is nothing new.

.
.
.

Spitzer is not immortal, neither was Bill Clinton or many others not "caught".

Spitzer opened up to his family and the world.

We see how much empathy he got.

I'm on his side, and I think so is his family.

But the political world seems to be making much more of this than should be.

He got "caught" - maybe - we don't know all the details.

But I'm sure the USAmerican public will spend an enormous amount of time following this story,

all the while allowing their taxes to continue killing innocent Iraqis and Afghans at the behest of the "moral" war on terror in the Middle East.

Priorities - right?

[opihimoimoi]

24. Well, them wives had better pay attention to the rules for keeping their men HAPPY and GRATIFIED

within acceptable bounds of course...no bestiality and little kids....

Then some of them won't have to "Stand by Your Man"...so much....a no brainer....

[katty]

25. Do like Jackie O: don't show up-go shopping $$/vacation

my answer to stand by yr man: "Sorry hon, you're on your own with this one" you get out there and explain WHY.