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[mikelewis]

Death…

To cease all physical and bodily functions… to lose all animation and to begin the decaying and reintegration of the physical mass into the environment.

To die…

To end… to cease… to be a person no more… to transfer from I Am to I Am not… forever and ever and ever…

No Faith nor impotence…

No Hope nor despair…

No Love nor hate…

No end nor beginning…

To feel no pain nor pleasure…

To feel no loss nor rejoice over gain…

To be cast adrift into darkness… the absence of light…

Death…

Forever cast into the abyss of nothingness… the end of fear… the death of fear… the failure of the demons within us and dissolution of the Angels among us… the end of reason… the end of justice… the end of nobility… the end of pride… the end of humility… the end of arrogance… the end of strength… the end of weakness… the end… the end… the end… of everything…

Or at least… maybe we should hope this is so… I fear most of us should hope this is so… for if we are left with only who we are as a person… if our eternity begins where our life ends… what will we take with us on our bon voyage? What regrets… what demons will haunt our dreams… what sorrow will we bring… what joy… what sense of justice… what honor of the gifts of those who came before… what gifts will we leave to those who follow after … what if our eternity begins were our life ends?

Will I be a soul that wallows in shame… will self-pity and self-doubt eat at me like jackals on the rotting corpse of a lion or will bees make a feast in my ribs for hope to endure? Will I be deaf, dumb and blind… cast adrift and cast away… or will I hear with nothing to hear, speak with no one to speak to and see only limitless darkness?

I do not understand life… I cannot fathom its enormity nor answer any question I have posed for I do not know… all I know is that I exist right now… at this very moment in time I am alive… and if my eternity begins where my life ends I want to drink in as much of what is good and decent and hopeful and courageous and bold and faithful and honorable as I can hold… I want to store up as much intangibles as I can carry in my heart and mind and soul… indeed, I want to hoard them if those are all I have left of me if my eternity begins where my life ends…

My family is facing a death and I needed to get this dreadful demon out into the open… Death frightens me because I do not understand it nor do I understand life to any great degree; though I know I love it… What a mystery it is to be alive knowing that ultimate and final change awaits us like a shadow in the corner; hungering for nightfall… are we seeds in a vineyard or are we merely forgotten epiphanies… I do not know and I am comforted by the fact that no one else knows either; in spite of how strongly they believe they do. Faith that is built of vanity is no faith to follow…

The day has not come… this person is still a person… but death is loping through the forest primeval… it’s howl can be heard as twilight wanes… its approach is inevitable… unstoppable… the end approaches doggedly; and when it comes, leaving sorrow for a time… but also leaving me something to cherish… at least for a time… for too short of time it seems… unless of course the gifts of the soul stay with me throughout eternity and then maybe I can suck the juice of sorrow and even find delight… as when I bite into a peach and remember joy… forever and ever.

What wonderment is life… what an amazing experience and overwhelming possibility… indeed what a blessing…

Death…

To cease all physical and bodily functions… to lose all animation and to begin the decaying and reintegration of the physical mass into the environment…

Or…

Death…

The beginning of eternity, dining on the fruits of life…

Only time will tell.

[nashville_brook]

1. oh wow. what a post.

i'm sorry for your impending loss. but i have to say that your words are truly beautiful. especially this:

I do not understand life… I cannot fathom its enormity nor answer any question I have posed for I do not know… all I know is that I exist right now… at this very moment in time I am alive… and if my eternity begins where my life ends I want to drink in as much of what is good and decent and hopeful and courageous and bold and faithful and honorable as I can hold… I want to store up as much intangibles as I can carry in my heart and mind and soul… indeed, I want to hoard them if those are all I have left of me if my eternity begins where my life ends…

thank you for this reflection. i hope i remember it for a long time.

[nashville_brook]

2. a kick for visibility

more people should see this

[patrice]

3. My mother-in-law died a little over a week ago.

I was the last friend she had on Earth.

My Dad died about 2 years ago.

My big Sister died about 3 years ago.

My first husband died 10 years ago.

My current husband and another sister are fighting cancer.

I was with my husband and my big sister when they passed on.

It's never going to be "okay". I don't want to "Give it to Jesus" or anyone else.

I've learned to live with the pain as though it were an unmoveable object in my life, an artifact of my relationships to these persons.

I'm not an athiest, but I don't think "God" is all so wrapped up in us as some folks think.

Live for Love, because that's all there is.

The answer is that there are no answers.

Meditation helps.

:hug:

[mikelewis]

8. I'm sorry for your loss...

Though your story does remind me of another story of a mother-in-law from a different time... Naomi was Ruth's mother-in-law and that tragic story of a mother-in-law caring for and guiding Ruth to Boaz has inspired me many times. In spite of losing everything, Naomi still offered her all for the love she felt for her children to Ruth; two people bound together by only strings of love and devotion. The success story of Ruth takes seed in the suffering of Naomi... for it was Ruth who begot Obed... who begot Jesse... who begot David, the hopeful king. I guess the truth of that story lies in the hope that suffering can give rise to greater things... even if we can't see what they may possibly be today. I hope your story is the same... great suffering giving rise to hope... not just for you but for a great many others as well...

There are some that say "God is Love" so living for Love is the highest form of honor one can observe in their lives... and that transcends all philosophy and religion. I'm sorry for your loss... and I'm sorry there is no balm that I can offer that would assuage that pain... Though if God truly is Love and if our ancestors are even remotely right... that if we continue on in the grace of Love then there is hope and where there is hope... there is the promise of life.

[patrice]

9. Nothing is ever lost.

It"s all still here. That and more . . .

[mikelewis]

10. You may be right...

This woman's experience was very illuminating and comforting...
http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/view/id/229

[patrice]

4. P.S. Life and Death are words we made up. nt

[Fredda Weinberg]

5. Death is dis-incorporation, disintegration back into the energy from

which our systems are formed. I've stared @ it enough to know it's nothing but the end of my story.

Great part about being human is, I began the narrative as soon as I gained language and it's only gotten richer with relationships. I'll leave behind impressions that will affect others, just as photons appear to defy time.

The older I've gotten, the simpler the principles have become, to the point where I can explain to youngsters why they're here. The reward is their enthusiastic response, volunteering to become another constructive generation.

When you look @ the equations ... how much is invested in each physical being ... it's a spiritual experience to contemplate the magnitude of the possibilities and a consolation to remember that while loved ones may die, memories are eternal. My losses have also been my gains. In mourning, we acknowledge the value of relationships through the pain. The more it hurts, the more it meant.

Projecting sensations into an afterlife is a whimsical exercise, but death shouldn't frighten anybody into infantilism. When I sang to my mother in her final hours, I promised her eternal life with the man she loved ... true enough and certainly what she wanted to hear in her coma. And Mike, after seeing that couple together for decades, it is eternal bliss.

[alfredo]

6. Death is the easiest thing we can do. You can't screw it up, you don't

even need to try.

It is our final sacrifice for future generations. It allows even the cruelest to do a little something for his fellow man. Our only real gift to the earth is returning to it so our bodies can nourish life.

[Ellipsis]

7. Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak...

Whispers the o'er-fraught heart, and bids it break.

--Malcolm in Macbeth


:hug:


Embrace it.

Strength will follow.