George Bush's mission

[hyphenate]

Several days ago, the White House press secretary announced that Bush was going to fund a new project in Washington, D.C. that would search through the many archives and artifacts in Federal warehouses, to cut down on the amount of paper being stored which could be a fire hazard, and find artifacts that could be sold at auction to help reduce the nation's financial woes.

"There are some really cool things in those warehouses, and I am personally going to go all out to arrange for the greatest yard sale this country has ever seen!"

Years of collecting various artifacts led to sloppy inventory over the years, especially after WWII, when all but one employee was laid off. Bush is now eager to assign several temp employees with a keen eye to flushing out items which are obselete or have been deemed irrelevant by way of the FOIA. Several of the most renowned scientists and academic experts will be on hand to do the most thorough job possible in finding, cataloging and marking each and every item accurately.

When asked what kind of artifacts he hopes to find, Bush mentioned that some of the most intriguing objects came to Washington before, during and after WWII. Many items were seized from the Nazis and their collaborators, and those were the items highest in priority.

"I'm looking for one object in particular," he said. "It's this big white box that came into our possession before the war. It'll be the proof I need that the Big Guy is on our side."

Refusing to elaborate, Bush only smiled and said, "Our country will be hailing me as the best president yet. Just you wait and see."




























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APRIL FOOLS!

Bush really isn't going after the Ark of the Covenant, is he? Will we ever know?

[damntexdem]

1. Chelsea Clinton and Monica Lewinsky will do a joint collegiate tour.

"We'll each answer questions in our own areas of expertise" says Monica.





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