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The Republicans have come up with a new slogan, "Change You Deserve."
My first thought was that anybody who votes Republican is indeed voting for the kind of change they deserve.
Then somebody pointed out that this slogan was already in use for the antidepressant Venlafaxine, sold under the brand name Effexor. I wondered why the Republicans would do that--are they subliminally promising to lift us out of the coming economic depression that Bush created for us? Or what? Then I had a look at the side effect list for Effexor, and it all came clear. The Republicans are--sort of--letting a cat out of the bag here. Turns out that both Effexor and Republicanism have a large number of unpleasant side effects. Here, let me show you what I mean:
Below is a list of identified Effexor side effects followed by their relevance to Republicanism.
* Nausea – Republicans are enough to make you sick to your stomach. * Headache – They're enough to give you a headache, too. * Drowsiness, Yawning – You have to be asleep to fall for Republican propaganda. * Dry mouth –Related to nervousness, anxiety (see below) * Dizziness – A common condition in those who listen to Republican spin * Insomnia -- Who can sleep with those maniacs in charge? * Nervousness, Anxiety –ditto insomnia * Loss of appetite – See nervousness above * Body weakness – a sign that the Republican vampires are getting at you * Sweating – See nervousness * Constipation – Republicans are full of shit—this is why. * High blood pressure (hypertension) – They make ya SO angry... * Ejaculation problems – That's why they keep praying for a Second Cumming? * Shakiness (tremors) – See nervousness * Diarrhea – They scare the shit out of you * Chills – Just the thought of them being in charge... * Vomiting – Republicans are so hard to stomach... * Blurred vision – like thinking you see terrorists & WMD everywhere? * A decreased sex drive (libido) – Just thinking about those creepy Republican perverts is enough... * Infections – Republicanism IS an infection * Flushing, redness in face -- See Bill O'Reilly * Gas – Explains Bush & fart jokes * Abnormal dreams – Which they have trouble separating from reality. * Agitation -- Ever listen to a Fundy preacher when he gets wound up? * Confusion -- Pretty much explains McCain. * Unusual thoughts – like Creationism and denial of global warming?
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