Potential VP running mates...VERY funny stuff.

[Hamlette]

Senator Joe Lieberman

PROS:
- makes Obama look much, much taller
- theoretically helps with independent voters
- reassures voters that unpleasant-but-survivable status quo will remain essentially untouched
- his nomination would ensure that David Broder, David Brooks, George Will, and Mickey Kaus would all get such massive erections that they would die of lack of blood flow to the brain

CONS:
- is Joe Lieberman
- no, seriously, is Joe Lieberman

Alice Cooper

PROS:
- will introduce America to desperately needed alternative diets, IE, eating a snake live on stage
- no way in hell anybody tries to assassinate Obama now
- campaign will be the first campaign in history to have good theme music

CONS:
- campaigned against John Kerry in 2004, could depress base
- “School’s Out” evidences dangerous potential for interest in school privatization, which could hurt campaign with teacher’s unions
- may steal Michelle Obama’s mascara

The Entire State of Ohio

PROS:
- guarantees crucial swing state of Ohio in November
- earns points with neighboring states which will feel more important
- two words: fried cheese

CONS:
- Ohio kind of sucks
- you just know Florida is going to get jealous
- difficulty of fitting entire state into Naval Observatory

http://mightygodking.com/index.php/2008/05/19/vice-presidential-prognosticatin/

[LeftishBrit]

1. bwaha!

I'd go for either A Kitty or An Enormous Sundae!

[NightWatcher]

2. Obama/ Kittens 08 would be an unstopable juggernaut

[On the Road]

3. As is Pointed Out in the Comments Section,

The 'inspiration' for this list is a 2004 article from McSweeney's:

4. Bill Clinton, former President
Pro: Oh man, that would be awesome—could you imagine? He'd be all like Yeah, I'm back, so suck on this, y'all and everyone would be all No way and he'd be all Way
Con: None

5. Bob Graham, Senator, Florida
Pro: Decades-long career as America's most popular evangelist could deliver Christians and conservatives
Con: Invented the graham cracker, which, frankly, isn't that great


http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2004/5/26moe.html