We put our dog to sleep today...

[RevolutionStartsNow]

We've been on vacation all week, going home tomorrow, and left our 17 year old daughter home with the dogs. On the second night, she noticed that our 9 year old black lab was not feeling well -- she was diagnosed with kidney disease several months ago but has been okay. We almost came home (we're about 5 hours away) but we got her to our regular doctor (after a trip to the emergency vet hospital) and she said that while the disease was advancing, she was okay and could just board there all week.

Today the vet called and said that she had taken a turn for the worse, and that it was not reversible or really even treatable. All of her kidney tissue is gone, her kidneys have no function at all anymore. She was also in a lot of pain.

It was agonizing, being so far away, but we decided to let her go. My husband is despondent. This was "his" dog; she has a birth defect, a mega-esophogous, and required special feeding (he had to hold her up for 20 minutes after every meal to make sure the food went down). The doctor said she never should have lived this long with that condition, and in fact it was totally unrelated to her kidney disease.

We're very very sad, and wondering what to tell our 13 year old son who is on the trip with us. We decided not to tell him tonight, he has a friend with him and we don't want to ruin his last night on the trip. I'm wondering when we should tell him: on the way home tomorrow morning, or when we get home? There's another very lovable dog at home, I think that will help ease the pain somewhat, but he's going to be devastated no matter when we tell him. She wasn't an old dog, and she didn't even seem sick from the kidney disease, but we knew this was coming.

Ugh. Virtual hugs would be nice. :(

[blogslut]

1. I'm so sorry

:hug:

[Catshrink]

2. I'm so sorry. It's so hard to lose one of our furbabies.

:grouphug:

[stillcool]

3. my heart hurts for you..

and your family. :hug:

[Pirate Smile]

4. I'm so sorry. I know how much that hurts.

:(:grouphug:

[latebloomer]

5. I'm very sorry

I know how much it hurts to lose a pet. They are members of the family and we grieve for them.

Their lives are way too short.

:hug:

[liberalmuse]

6. God, I'm sorry.

That is a hard decision to have to make. I wouldn't wish it on anyone--and I mean both having to put down a beloved pet, and telling your child. You know your child better than anyone in the world and no doubt you will know when to tell him. :hug:

[all.of.me]

7. I'd wait until you got home.

When I was 6, my dog had been hit by a car, and we took her to the vet. The next day, we went to the airport to get my Grampa for a visit. In the car on the way home, they told me the dog did not make it through the night (I actually think they put her down, since she'd broken her back). I screamed all the way home. I was devastated with no place to release it.

I empathize, and my thoughts are with you. I've put down two dogs, the last was two years ago, feels like yesterday, and then this one I had as a kid died. Ugh. No more animals. It's too painful. Hugs to you.

[Tangerine LaBamba]

8. What a sad, sad event .........

Your boy will handle it because you'll tell him the truth. I'd tell him as soon as possible so that he doesn't feel "set up" when he walks into the house. If you're straight with him, he'll be able to deal with it. But, there is nothing like losing a beloved pet. No one, I think, ever gets over it.

How is your daughter? She's there alone, and she's just a kid, too.

Here's a bunch of hugs, and I wish you good luck .....................

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

[RevolutionStartsNow]

14. Thank you, our daugher is at home...

She's with her boyfriend, and she is okay. She didn't want to go to the hospital one last time, it was too sad for her and I think she may have felt like it would be her saying goodbye for all of us, and it was too much.

[Stinky The Clown]

9. You got all the virtual hugs yu can handle. So does your husband.

Many, many years ago, 'my' dog had to be put down in Maryland while I was in Vancouver.

That felt as bad as losing my parents. Not the same. But as bad.

For you :hug:

For your husband :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:




No joke .... I'm sitting here with tears for you.

Dogs - the very definition of unconditional love

[RevolutionStartsNow]

17. Awww...

That's very sweet. I really need to be home with my other dog. He's my best friend.

[sorcrow]

10. My condolences

So sorry for your troubles.
It's a tough thing to say goodbye to an old friend.
Regards.

Crow

[LakeSamish706]

11. I am so sorry... There is nothing like loosing a pet... They are a substantial part..

of the family... I have 3 cats and 2 dogs that I love dearly and would be devastated if anything were to happen to them.... Words can't make your pain any less, but I hope that you can move on from this, intact....

[chatnoir]

12. I'm so so sorry

I know how awful and painful that decision is -- I've been down that road a few times myself and its always heartbreaking. :(

My heart goes out to you. :hug: :hug:

[JimGinPA]

13. That's A Shame...

We just lost one of our dogs a couple of weeks ago. It's a tough thing to go through.


http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=8635368



We still have our female Shepherd and we're going to get another pup in a few weeks, but we'll always miss him I guess.


I wish I could offer some advice about telling your boy, other than wait until it feels right.


K&R & :hug:

[marketcrazy1]

22. I am very sorry this happened to you

my prayers are with you, as for your son, wait until you get home. better to be home with all the family together. your son will have his own space to mourn and his families undivided attention and support. I think the long drive home with this news weighing on his mind......... well... it would be very hard on him. just my thoughts on the matter, do what you think is best. very sad.....:hug: :grouphug:

[Elwood P Dowd]

15. I lost my 9-year-old dog to kidney disease a few weeks ago.

Lost a cat that had been with me for 15 years a week later. I understand how you feel.

[X_Digger]

16. Condolences.

Less than a month ago, we had to put down our almost 10 year old doxie. 9 years of phenobarbitol for idiopathic seizure disorder caused his liver to finally give out. So I can totally understand losing a "shouldn't have lived this long" dog- they're a wonder every day you have them. {{{{hugs}}}}

[OnyxCollie]

18. ((((((())))))))

[Fumesucker]

19. That hurts...

My sympathies and condolences.

:grouphug:

[Botany]

20. From one lab person to another

The more you loved and the more you were loved the more you will hurt ....
and the bigger the hurt the bigger the love.

You gave your dog the best gift in the world you took her pain away and that
is a good thing. And trust me on this one, any boy who grows up w/ lab is rich
beyond all the money in the world.

Not every boy needs a dog but every dog needs a boy (girl).

Right now my 14 year old son is sleeping w/ his best buddy right next to him .... I will go
and give 'em both a kiss in honor of your dog.

Over time the pain will go and the memories of the good times will always be with you.

[RevolutionStartsNow]

21. Thanks so much, everyone

I knew I could come here for some love. And I know that there are many people here who understand how much we love our dogs. They are so dependent on us, and give back so much...

[glinda]

23. Sorry what has happened and that you were so far away.

we had a Russian Blue that we had gotten from our Vet when someone did not pay for his medical. He had drunk blue toilet bowl cleaner.He died at age 7 and we were told that he did not even expect him to live to be that old. Autopsy showed one dead kidney and the other shriveled up. Like you it was hard. I was at work. If you can remember that you gave him your all and the best possible chance for life ever. Without you both life would have been much shorter.
For your son and your husband. I hate to even mention but there are so many animals that need a family right now at pounds and shelters. Maybe sometime your husband and son can give some lucky pup a home....

[RB TexLa]

24. So very sorry

:hug:

[SPedigrees]

25. I'm so very sorry.

I've lost a dog and a pony to age-related kidney failure, and treated 3 older cats with fluid therapy for chronic renal failure. I feel your pain.

That is an unhappy ending to a vacation. At least your dog was in the vet hospital when it happened, and it was not for lack of care that she passed on. It is sad for your kids too. Only time will ease the pain, I'm afraid. I'm so sorry.

[woodsprite]

26. I'm so sorry to hear about your dog.

We had to have ours put down last year at only 7 yrs old due to lung cancer, so I know what you're going through. It's so hard to make that decision and I'm sorry it happened while you were away. I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers and am sending you and your family a ton of virtual hugs. It sounds like your dog had a wonderful life and extraordinary caregivers. :hug:

[Fire1]

27. We have a black lab about the same age and he is my

husbands dog. Ours has hip displasia and has been on meds for about a year now. His liver has to be checked periodically. My husband said after this one he doesn't think he could go through losing another. I certainly understand how you are feeling and I am so so
sorry.:cry:

[madmom]

28. I am so sorry, My eyes are tearing up, I am remembering my

baby I had to put down about 5 years ago.I cried for a week. It still hurts. Take as many of these as you need...:hug:

[Iwillnevergiveup]

29. You made a hard choice

but the right choice, Revolution.

Implicit in pet ownership is our acceptance of their all-too-short lives. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family, including your other dog. And a hug for each of you.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[Old and In the Way]

30. Dogs are special...they become part of the family.

Been through this a few times and will go through it again. Doesn't ever get easier. Take care...you might want to discuss the situation with your son on the way home. I lost my black lab on a trip home with my 14YO son....he just went peacefully. Boy, that was a looong ride.

[BlooInBloo]

31. :((((

[footinmouth]

32. I am so sorry for your loss

It's so hard when they leave you. They have such short happy lives. As for your son, there's just no good time to tell him. I think I'd just wait till you get home. My sons were in their mid 20's when our last dog had to be put down. Even though she was nearly 17, they still took it badly. I dreaded making those phone calls. Good luck to you. It's not easy but eventually everyone will make peace with it.

[DesertRat]

33. I've been through it a couple of times

and I know hard it is. The best thing is to tell your son the truth. Tell him just what you told us in the OP. The disease wasn't treatable, her kidneys weren't functioning and she was in pain.

I'm very sorry. :hug:

[omega minimo]

34. he will appreciate you loving him -- and the dog -- enough to be honest.

:hug:

[Hekate]

35. I'm so sorry. Our big cat Othello died of kidney failure on Feb. 20. Fortunately...

... I was able to be with him during the last 2 weeks of his life, and with our veterinarian's assurance that he was not in pain, we allowed him to die naturally and at home. When I wrapped him in warm dry towels (waiting it out involved a lot of laundry) I would hold him awhile and talk to him about the Happy Hunting Grounds. He was nearly 20 years old.

We had to put our son's Lab-Dobie mix to sleep last March though, and it was much harder on all of us. She was about 15 years old and very big -- gravity weighed cruelly on her with her advanced arthritis, and she could scarcely get up and down. Our son was 30, but even so he cried. Our family vet was so compassionate when Zima wouldn't get out of the car and growled at the vet-techs who tried to make her, even after a tranquilizer. So he gave her shot #1 of the euthanasia and told us to go park under a tree someplace for an hour, which we did. He said this drug would make her feel like a pup running through heavenly fields: "We know this because human addicts tell us so." I held her head in my lap and stroked her ears and talked to her, and when we took her back she was able to be removed from the car unconscious.

You must tell your son before you get home, as soon as you can. He knows the dog was sick and in pain. In my philosophy death comes as a release for the terminally ill, whether animal or human. The animals in our care look to us to "make it better", and they trust us so. It's cruel to keep them past their time. Beyond that, their unconditional love for us comes at a price: they grow old and die long before we do. Although it's a hard lesson, it's simply the way things are. Someday another puppy will come into your family, and the love that you all had for the old dog will expand and go on, without forgetting your old pal.

I'm in tears remembering, and yet... good times were had by all.

Here's your virtual hugs :hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

Hekate

[TahitiNut]

36. !

:hug:

Been there. Done that. Black Labrador. (Without a wife, kids, or another dog to help me through. It hurt a loong time.)

:hug:

[emilyg]

37. I am so sorry. It hurts.

[Stellabella]

38. I'm so sorry that happened.

Pets are so dear, and they just don't live long enough.

:hug:

[dweller]

39. one virtual hug coming your way

your 13 yr old will be fine, he has to accept life's changes as they come. And he's probably ready picking up from your own acceptance of the situation as you knew.

sorry about your Lab though,
dp

[Lone_Star_Dem]

40. My heart goes out to you and your family.

It's always painful to lose one of our furry members of the family.
Sending a big cyber-hug for you and yours to pass around. :grouphug:

[Triana]

41. I'm so sorry! You guys did good by the pup. She'd never have lived that long

without your loving care. She was lucky to have you and to be in good care during her last days.

Still, I know it's hard losing a family member. I'm sorry! :hug:

[dana_b]

42. many, many hugs!!

I'm so sorry. it is losing a member of your family and that's a terrible loss. Your pup is looking down but is happy and healthy where she is now.

[exboyfil]

43. My in laws had to put down their 15 year old huskie/lab this

week. I had asked that we get the chance to say goodbye, but my mother in law is kind of weird about that. She put her down in the morning before we had a chance to see her one last time.

She was a great dog, and I jogged many miles with her before she got too old. My oldest learned how to handle dogs with her, and she and her sister now have two Border Collies.

I feel bad for you. I still remember putting our 13 year old beagle down about 8 years ago. I can't imagine losing our border collies, but I know it will happen eventually.

[quiller4]

44. I'm so sorry. I know how hard it is to let loved dogs go.

We still have our 15+ Brittany-Springer mix, Sarah, but we had to put her brother down in January.

We almost lost her last summer to a liver ailment. Her kidney function is somewhat impaired, she has a mild heart murmur and she doesn't see very well. Still we love her, feed her prescription food and fight with her twice daily to get her meds down her. We're on borrowed time I know.

I think I would tell your son as soon as you drop off his friend. He is at an age where crying in front of a friend or sibling would be embarrassing but crying in front of parents is still OK.

My heart goes out to you.

[bluedawg12]

45. I am so sorry for your loss. We have two wonderful poochies

and one broke his paw Easter Sunday playing and we were a mess with worry.

The loss of a dog is like losing family. Been there and I undertand.

I hope your lab is up in dog heaven chasing a ball in a clear blue lake.

In life I know she was well loved.


"If there are no dogs in heaven, when I die, I want to go where they go." - Will Rogers.

[Demeter]

46. Hardest Thing I 've Ever Done, My Condolences

You truly had run out of options. You were a good and responsible family for your Best Friend, and a friend in return.

[Syrinx]

47. condolences

I'm a huge dog lover, and I feel your pain. I love my mutt. Best wishes.

[Hekate]

48. Just wanted to add a link to a poem called Rainbow Bridge a friend gave me when Othello died.

She really loves it, and maybe you will too.

http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm

[Are_grits_groceries]

49. So sorry...

"We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached. Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way."
Irving Townsend

[tavalon]

50. He'll be waiting by the rainbow bridge

[northernlights]

51. I'm so, so sorry

That she lived so long with her condition is a tribute to the love you gave her. She was lucky to have found you as her people.

Is there any good time to tell someone they've lost a loved one? I think I'd wait until you got home. The drive home would be just miserable for your son. He may want to be able to retreat somewhere to be alone or spend time hugging your other dog, for comfort. It would be hard to give him what he needs to grieve while driving or in a strange place...

[ejpoeta]

52. so sorry to hear. we had to put our 11 year old german shepherd down

a couple of years ago. maybe he was 12. we adopted him when he was six. he was canadian, but we didn't hold it against him!! LOL! we had to put him down because he could barely even stand up anymore. he'd lay in his own excrement on the floor and he was almost 100 lbs, which made him hard to move. the day we took him to the vet my husband had to carry him out to the car. we cried when they told us his spinal deterioration would only get worse. what kind of life is that for a dog!! i remember when he tried to get up to chase the cat and couldn't even get up to do that!!

it's sad. it's hard. to some he was just a dog, but he was an important part of our family. don't let anyone lessen minimize your feelings. and as far as your son goes, we had to tell our daughter. and we told her that jimmy went to sleep and didn't wake up. i remember telling her how jimmy was in heaven... finally able to run around and knock people over with his tree branch sticks (which he used to do with us! LOL!) that helped a bit. to remember him as he was. and not in pain anymore. she cried. we buried him in the back yard by the pond. he loved that pond. and we still miss him. i send you hugs from my family.

[xchrom]

53. ...

Dear God, protect and bless all beings that breathe, keep all evil from them, and let them sleep in peace. Amen.
--Albert Schweitzer, "Memoirs of Childhood and Youth"

[dysfunctional press]

54. WAIT until you get home to tell your son.

no 13-year old boy wants to break down crying in front of a friend.

i feel very sorry for you all.
i have a FANTASTIC 2-year old black lab that we got from a breeder who was going to put her down as she was 'unsellable'.
(the breeder is our neighbor's sister, and she's not running a 'puppy-mill').

[eowyn_of_rohan]

55. My sympathies...We lost our beloved dog yesterday, too - from a DENTAL CLEANING

He "was" our Wheaten Terrier, 12 years old. We've had him since he was 7 weeks old... The vet had been hounding me to get our dog's teeth cleaned. I have resisted because I was afraid for him to go under anesthesia/tranquilizers, whatever... Friday I took him in to get a lump checked out (turned out to be fatty, benign tumor), and was pressured again to have it done on the spot. I expressed my concerns and reasons for them, and was assured they had it all under control and our dog would be FINE. Against my strong instincts to the contrary, I went along with it. We picked him up a couple hours later, and took him home. He did not do well...I called the vet and he said call back in the morning if he wasn't doing better... By morning he was much worse, and we took him back to the vet at 8am. They said they should keep him there on IV for the day. When we went to get him again, his electrolytes and kidney function were still off and he still had a rapid heartbeat. We had to leave him overnight. Yesterday morning we got a call that our dog was gone....His heart and kidneys failed. It is devastating. We buried our little guy yesterday. I can't believe he is gone.

He was cheerful and wagging his tail Friday, and happy to go for a ride - I can hardly forgive myself for turning him over to this person who killed my dog.



My Cody, smiling in the Black Hills
:cry:

[IndyOp]

57. Oh, sweetie - Cody was gorgeous and he knew he was loved and that is all that matters.

The end.

Do not allow yourself to waste any energy judging yourself or anyone else about his death.

Cody was gorgeous and knew he was loved - wonderfully well - for 12 good years.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[eowyn_of_rohan]

64. thank you so much

I hope I can come to terms with what happened and not be tortured with guilt and blame... The trouble is the vet made some major errors, including using tranquilizers and reversal drugs that Pfizer states should not be used on geriatric dogs, or dogs who have kidney, liver, or heart problems... My Cody trusted me, I trusted the vet... it is so hard to take. I do feel deeply grateful for the time we have had together... just feel so lost right now.

[Sheltiemama]

68. I'm so sorry.

[eowyn_of_rohan]

76. Thank you for understanding, Sheltie's Mom

My Cody fell in love on his 1st birthday, with a female Sheltie. They met at a dog park, and it was love at first sight. They just took off together, ran to the top of a hill and just sat together, gazing out... if other male dogs came near her he would stand between them. We, and the Sheltie's owner were just amazed- it was so sweet. Cody was such a gentleman.

Cody is/was my baby, too. This pain is just too much.

[eowyn_of_rohan]

56. ...

:cry: :hug:

I am so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Mz Pip]

58. So sorry.

I sounds like you gave a wonderful and loving home to a critter who might not otherwise have had one. She was lucky to have found you and your family.

You gave her a good life and a dignified passing. Peaceful crossings to your sweet dog.

:grouphug:

Mz Pip

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

59. I am so sorry for your loss. Being a pet person for my entire 57 years I have seen

too many wonderful friends leave my life. Hugs to you and your family.

[uppityperson]

60. I am so sorry. Our 12 yr old guy is going soon also

I am sad for you and for us. hugs to you

Our golden/rott mix has solid areas over his kidneys, and lumps here and there (not just lipomas) and we know it is going to happen sometime soon. Hoping he can get a few days sleeping in the sun, but it is difficult.

Hugs to you and yours

[DarbyUSMC]

61. Sending many hugs. So sorry for your loss.

[LWolf]

62. .

:hug:

[applegrove]

63. (((HUGS)))

[Rhiannon12866]

65. I am so sorry... Virtual hugs coming.

We lost our seven-year-old Airedale in February, cancer. His little "brother" misses him terribly, as do the human members of his "pack." It never gets any easier. ;(

Rhiannon :hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

[Fire_Medic_Dave]

66. So sorry. We just lost an 8 month old puppy, my heart goes out to you and your family.

:hug:

Rainbow Bridge


Just this side of Heaven is a place called The Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes over the Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill or old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling to each other in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face, your hands again caress the beloved head and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life, but never absent from your heart!

Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together……..

[eowyn_of_rohan]

67. oh God...

Thank you so much for this:cry:

I am so sorry about your puppy. This is such a hard day-we lost our dog yesterday

[Fire_Medic_Dave]

70. This one was especially hard.

We knew she didn't have long maybe 6 more months. She went into liver failure and her blood stop clotting. She didn't make it through that weekend. I'm sorry about your loss. We've lost a lot. We foster terminally ill dogs, I wish I knew something to make it easier but there's nothing. Give them all the love you can while you have them and take comfort that they knew they were loved. :hug:

David

[Sheltiemama]

69. I'm so sorry.

[angstlessk]

71. I recall when I had to put down the ONLY dog I ever loved...and cried more than I did when my mom

died. She loved to ride in the car..and when her final day arrived I knew it...when she no longer enjoyed her ride..but only laid in the back seat and seemed in pain...we went to the vet and they put her down,she had spinal cancer. I cried uncontrollably for weeks!..I loved her so!

[roguevalley]

73. Cesar Milan says talk about it and let kids talk. He also says he

takes his dog out into nature and gives them their last day and makes it as lovely as he can, with grass and trees and lots of affection. It eases them away and helps him a lot. There is no easy way but know that the pain they didn't let you know they felt is gone and they are happy and at peace.


:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[roguevalley]

72. oh honey, I am with you. Your baby had to go and stayed with you

all this time from love. Right now, my fifteen year old dachshund, Andrew, is going in Tuesday to get his eye removed. He poked it (he's blind, has addisons and is feeble) and it has gone bad. I hope he makes it and I think he will because as a dog he loves me with his whole being. Your dog did too. He stayed long past his time for you and your family. That is why i love dogs so much. They make us better. Your family was made better by your babies and I hug you, I wish you only peace and love.

[Prophet 451]

74. *hugs*

We lost our adored cat to feline AIDS last month (she was a former stray), we understand your heartbreak entirely.

Again, *hugs*

[mnhtnbb]

75. I am so sorry. Hugs to you and all your family. It's so hard to let a fur baby go.

We had to put our 14 yo Tanya to sleep last summer; I still miss her.

[shadowknows69]

77. Sincere sympathies here from a career dog lover

:grouphug:

[a la izquierda]

78. I'm so sorry for your "doggie" loss

My old boy is having a lot of problems. It's no fun.

When we put our little Chi-weenie down years ago, my husband was so devastated that he slept for 36 hours straight. Skipped work. It was awful.