Domestic violence

[me b zola]

Do you think that it will go away if nobody talks about it?


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[Danger Mouse]

1. Well in general...

people are more sympathetic to children than adults. And the child being forced to help dismember her mother is one of the most repulsive things I've ever heard. Ever.
I think in this case I'm not surprised that's what people are talking about. It's a kind of loathsome that is novel.

[me b zola]

2. We can feel revulsion for what that child witnessed and lived through

...and still understand that the motive for this crime was domestic violence.

Why can't we admit that many American women are not safe in their own homes? Why can't we say this out loud?

[Danger Mouse]

3. I was never aware that this wasn't being said?

[CoffeeCat]

4. I think it's being said...

...and acknowledged. But I think that's where the buck stops.

Our society does next to nothing--when it comes to truly dealing with domestic violence and also
the abuse of children.

We don't have enough programs, and the programs we have are not funded properly. The heroes who
try to work to solve these problems are paid about 1/4 of what they deserve.

So yes, a lot is "said", but not enough is done.

[Danger Mouse]

5. Oh I agree.

[elleng]

9. In order to 'deal' with it, we have to know where it 'lives,'

and I'd be that in the vast majority of instances, we victims are unable to announce its existence. Unable due to fear of more violence to ourselves and/or our children, unable for financial reasons ('he' pays the rent; 'he'd lose his job if his boss knew), unable due to shame before family and friends, unable due to disbelief of others.

[InkAddict]

11. So very true...

It's what precedes the "violence" that is the problem...the greed, lust, selfishness, disrespect. It's as though relationship "detainees" are not people...and those closest or with the ability to assist believe that "it's ok to torture."

It takes away so much to take that first step away. Out of the frying pan of the relationship gone bad - into the fire of a society that blames victims.

[H2O Man]

10. I agree.

I would note, however, that child abuse is domestic abuse. Our society needs to invest much more in its approach to dealing with child abuse, as a primary prevention of the numerous other types of domestic violence.

[Warpy]

6. For the same reason we never think of including

women in hate crime legislation: violence works.

[elleng]

8. 'Motive' was domestic violence?

Wasn't that the MEANS, instead of the motive? Isn't motive found elsewhere, within the perp, within the relationship?

[asteroid2003QQ47]

7. Patriarchy=Domestic violence. Neither are likely to go away any time soon...

and it's a certainty that not talking about it won't help!
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"Violence is extremely common in the family; wife battering and incest provide two instances of this principle. If spousal abuse were included in the FBI's figures on assault, its incidence would increase by over 20 times.
Patriarchy lies at the core of wife battering."
--Erich Goode, Ph.D, in DEVIANT BEHAVIOR