Let's play "Name the Next Flu Pandemic"!

[The Doctor.]

I'm thinking we should have an 'Elephant Flu'. We could call it a 'Pachyderm Pandemic'.

Or how about a 'Beaver Cough'?

Anyone want to take a shot at the next big bug?

:puke: :think: :think: :puke:

[peace frog]

1. Big Bird Avian Flu

Snuffleupagus Sniffles

[The Doctor.]

2. Oooh... a real Hypochondriac, eh?

"Mammoth Mumps"?

[tridim]

3. Republicanism is a sickness, so elephant flu works for me.

All the GOP torture supporters have it already.

[The Doctor.]

5. Hmmm... wonder if that makes them more susceptible? n/t

[SoxFan]

4. The Great Bioengineered Cooties Outbreak of 2009

[The Doctor.]

22. Oh Noes! The "Dark Cooties"!

[SoxFan]

26. West Asian Heebie Jeebies

[qwertyMike]

6. Scottish sheep flu

That's caused by not wearing the kilt when 'attending' to the sheep on a wet day.

[The Doctor.]

14. Wow... that narrows down the epidemiology a little...

Now how is it transmitted?

:shrug: :shrug:

[Junkdrawer]

7. The "Quick, Look Over There" Pandemic of 2010... n/t

[NeedleCast]

8. I vote for Bubonic Flu

That'll really get the easily paniced spun up.

[The Doctor.]

12. Just skip straight to "Panic Flu"...

If you're afraid you have it, you do!

[NeedleCast]

20. I think timing will be the biggest issue

It should be started right around the time normal flu season starts, that way anyone who catches a cold, sinus infection or a standard strain of flu can be more easily induced to panic.

[BuyingThyme]

9. Death sniffles..

[The Doctor.]

10. Hehehe.... 'The runny nose of DOOM!'

[radfringe]

11. we've had - Mad Cow, Bird Flu, swine flu - howabout

Goat Gout?

[The Doctor.]

13. Uuuuuuuugghhh..... What are the symptoms?

[radfringe]

24. nausea, vomiting and headaches

from eating anything and everything around you, and banging your head against hard surfaces

[The Doctor.]

25. And the prognosis?

[radfringe]

35. prognosis

Goat Gout will run it's course WITHOUT treatment in 7 days

WITH antibiotics - it will take a week

although some patitents have reported lingering symptoms of having a yen to eat paper or grass, this may last up to a month and gradually decrease. If this occurs, patients are encouraged to see their doctor as in rare instances a secondary infection of NOPer Nausea (also known as Republican Retching, Boehner Barfing, Gingrich Grip, or Teabagger Trots) may develop.

The only known treatment for NOPer Nausea is to refrain from watching, reading, listening to or discussing extreme right-wing politics for 7-10 days. Reported cases of NOPer Nausea have been on the decline since November 2008, however there have been small periodic spikes of new cases. This indicates the virus is still active in segments of the population. There is no known cure, and may become a chronic condition, flaring up from time to time, most noteably around election time.

[dembotoz]

15. obama flu--he gets blamed for everything anyway

[carlyhippy]

16. Mother Earth's Revenge

It's not nice to fool mother nature....

[SidDithers]

17. Don't know about Beaver Cough...

but Giardiasis is commonly referred to as "Beaver Fever" :)

Sid

[The Doctor.]

21. Funny... the beaver is considered a resevoir for the disease.

The actual beaver... of course.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

18. The Screaming Shits.

[csziggy]

19. Martian Death Flu - Dave Barry nailed it years ago.

[11 Bravo]

23. The Muslim Flu. That should get some Repuke panties in a wad.

[cloudbase]

27. Bill Clinton Flu.

That's about the only thing left he hasn't been blamed for.

[The Doctor.]

33. Does that result in "Clenisitis"?

The inflammation of the Clenis could be serious!

[cloudbase]

34. Perhaps. No matter how many accolades one receives,

having a disease named after you isn't exactly a highlight of a lifetime.

[hedgehog]

28. Smithfield flu

http://www.grist.org/article/2009-04-25-swine-flu-smithfield/

[Critters2]

29. Kitteh flu. nt

[The Doctor.]

31. Oh noes!

[Critters2]

32. It'll start in the Lounge, no doubt. nt

[LeftyMom]

36. It will wipe out the songbirds first. nt

[DireStrike]

30. We could really use a chickenhawk pandemic.

[The Doctor.]

37. Ok... "Raccoon Flu" - Stewart should have gone with Platypus Flu anyway.

;)