Ghosts

[H2O Man]

"Have you ever seen someone who seemed a ghost of the person you remembered?"
--The Autobiography of Malcolm X; page 216.

There is a section in Malcolm’s autobiography where he talks about visiting some of his old street hustler friends, after he had become a well-known minister. Malcolm spoke about the amount of human talent that is wasted in the margins of American society. The "ghost" he spoke of was a man called West Indian Archie, a numbers’ runner who had a highly developed skill with math. As Malcolm noted, this skill was not used in a manner that benefited Archie for long, or his community at all. In fact, Malcolm tells about a "nickel-and-dime" hustler, who was found dead, who had over $760,000 in cash in his apartment. That illustrates one way for a poor neighborhood to remain impoverished.

I was thinking about this yesterday afternoon, as I visited someone I knew well when we were young "hoodlums." My old friend is a good example of the loss of potential that is found in communities across this country. When I was a homeless teenager, Lee and a couple other guys let me stay at their apartment. We were wild teenagers, and lived on the edge. Of the group of people we hung out with, very few changed their behavior in a positive way. I’m the only one that I can think of who went on to college. Some worked and invested their earnings in life in the fast lane. Some went to jail, a few to prison, and still others to a cycle involving rehab and psychiatric centers. Most of them are dead now.

Lee lived on the margins. He worked, and though he was the type of person who would be considered anti-social by polite society, he adhered to his own values of right and wrong, and his the hustlers’ code of conduct. A few years ago, while taking his grandchildren swimming, he slipped on a wet rock, and was seriously injured when he smashed the back of his head falling backwards. He was in a coma for a period of time, then spent an extended period in hospitals and physical rehabilitation centers. Now, he lives alone, in an efficiency apartment. He is in a wheel chair, and has lost the use of his right leg and arm.

At this point in life, I prefer to live a fairly secluded lifestyle. Lee is one of the few people I go to visit, though I do not see him often. But after seeing him yesterday, I can’t help but think about how his life could have been very different, were he to have had different opportunities as a little kid. He was one of the few kids that I remember being from a single-parent family, back in a time when it was far less common than today. Now, I’m not saying "maybe he’d have cured cancer," or that he wasn’t responsible for his behavior as an adult. But things could have been different, and the strengths he had could have enriched the community he lived in.

Those who read Malcolm’s book know that when he was in junior high school, and a teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up, Malcolm said an attorney. The teacher told him that was "unrealistic" for a black teen. To the end of his life, Malcolm would wonder about if things had been different ….for example, if that teacher had encouraged him, rather than crushing his dream. And he wondered what type of attorney he might have become.

Some young people are lucky enough to have at least one adult lend the support they need – maybe a parent or relative, a teacher or a coach – that helps them reach their potential. Others don’t. And likely, the majority of people fall somewhere in the middle.

I’m curious if DUers can remember what they dreamed of being as a kid? What adults helped them? And what ones might have done the opposite? I’m asking that for a couple of reasons. First, just to find out what experiences people who are progressive/liberal democrats may have had. And second, because I think that the problems are society is confronted with can only be dealt with by developing the full potential of the members of this society – and so much of that is wasted.

Of course, it is possible that this is the type of thing that only I find interesting. Maybe I need to get out more!

[redqueen]

1. Great question.

I knew one adult that was helpful... had a great English teacher one year in HS. The rest were the opposite.

[H2O Man]

9. I had a number

of good teachers. One in particular challenged me to do my best inside and out of her classroom. By no coincidence, she had me read Malcolm's autobiography.

I also had a number of teachers who had no business working in that field.

[Froward69]

2. I wanted to be

an airline pilot.
However in college my roommate was caught by the police with a 1/4 ounce of marijuana. I being the roommate who never turned him in received the same "possession" ticket. the fine was minimal. however the punishment was being laughed out of the recruiters office when I tried to join the Military. As Military flight time was at the time, preferred experience by the likes of United or Pan-Am.

now days as the recruiting standards are so low I could qualify. but my age determines I am still undesirable for flight school.

[Innoma]

3. The Future Is HERE, But I've Lost the Ticket...

I told my parents I wanted to be an astronaut around the time of the first Apollo mission - I remember being positively consumed with the event because the glorious future I had lived vicariously through Star Trek was suddenly here, right on my doorstep. The moon! Imagine that.

But it was a dream my parents pooh-poohed because it was impractical ... just another example of the kind of pie-in-the-sky wishful thinking children are prone to indulge in and are easily dismissed by adults. "Too hard!" they told me. "And you're not any good with math and science, so maybe you should pick something a little easier."

It wasn't a comment borne of malice, mind you, merely a very sound -- if ultimately devastating -- practical adult kind of comment that leaches all the color from a child's vivid imagination.

Since my parents knew everything there was to know, my interest in mathematics dwindled to nothing because I was told it was a subject I could never master, and my up-to-then indifferent and solidly average performance in math was a sure indicator the stars were not in my future. As a result, I failed math courses regularly throughout grade school, high school, and college (looking at my transcripts, I can see that I signed up for and subsequently dropped Algebra five times throughout my aborted college career; by that point, my fear and loathing of numbers ran very deep).

Sure, I could have blamed my parents for their practicality or my teachers for not igniting my imagination and determination (which, of course, I did for many years), but the real failure was that I accepted defeat too easily when I could have viewed it as a challenge rather than a built-in handicap.

Oddly enough, decades later I'm back in school (thanks to the late Carl Sagan, which is another story altogether) and getting top scores in math classes. I'm no late-blooming Einstein or math wizard or anything ... so far we're only talking about intermediate algebra and geometry! ... but it's not the insurmountable obstacle I always imagined it to be, either.

Maybe I could have been an astronaut after all.

Imagine that.

[SidneyCarton]

4. My 11th Grade history teacher, was a nut.

Most of the class hated his guts, but for some twisted reason I liked him, He's part of the reason I decided to study History in college, to go and become a professor. I'm the first person on my dad's side of the family to get a BA, in part because he, and my parents both encouraged me to go out and live up to my potential.

[Mr Generic Other]

5. H2O man, what a thoughtful post?

i teach in a public high school where 63% of the students qualify for free or reduced lunches (standard federal measurement for poverty levels in schools) and i spend lots of time pondering the same questions you have asked relating to your friend Lee.
since the nation is currently "debating" changes in how we pay for health care and you asked for testimonials, i wonder if a single-payer, universal health care system could go a long way toward providing the support that every individual needs to grow and develop? the support you wish your friend had had as a child.
its true, as many opponents of a public option or a single payer model say, that those living at or below poverty levels are eligible for medical coupons. but in order to get these coupons families and individuals have to spend hours and sometimes days in various government offices to determine eligibility. the process is demeaning and designed to highlight the applicant's dependent situation. these students can't afford to sit in a welfare office when they should be in school yet in order for them to be able to see a health care provider they must pay this cost.
what do you suppose the impact on these kids would be if our nation valued each of them enough to provide them with the same health care available to everyone else?
would students make more investment in themselves if there was a common recognition that they had value? that they were worth investing in?
this is only one possible benefit that americans might see if we manage to make real and effective changes in the way we pay for health care. it is a benefit that can't be easily quantified so i wouldn't expect anyone to incorporate it into the public debate but we pay much lip service to equality in this country without ever demonstrating a commitment toward trying to achieve any measure of it.
in nature, human beings are social creatures. we need community to survive.
capitalism, as practiced in america, requires that we abandon the elemental communal nature of being human. here, we survive at the expense of others rather than with the help of others.

[Gregorian]

6. A few things

I just wrote this all up, and then accidentally deleted it. So I'm just going to blurt it out this time.


I became interested in trumpet. I was good at it. The school teacher took me out of class each week, and taught me himself. That same teacher would go on to have troubles because of his racism. So had I been black, he wouldn't have been so kind.

As a boy scout, I remember Willie Mays showing up with his son one evening. And I also remember what he must have felt like. As someone who was different, I have felt how he must have felt. A black man in a room full of relatively affluent white kids. In fact, I doubt anyone in that room even knew who he was. And he never came back. I saw that as a real loss. One that was based upon the schism between the two separate Americas.

I also volunteered at the VA hospital after school every day, when I was 15. The chief of cardiology took me under his wing, and began showing me how to interpret electrocardiograms. It wasn't long before I had it under my command. And later went on to work in cardiology.

It doesn't seem like I've given you what you were interested in. But I became a professional musician. And I know it was partly due to positive reinforcement.

I also believe that as kids we are sponges. I've been thinking a lot about this lately. I honestly believe that the trouble with the world isn't due to kids. It's due to adults. And that there is no such thing as child. But there is such a thing as adult. In other words, being mature is pushed as being important, when I have always thought that it is the problem. But aside from all of that, when a child is treated with respect, they can accomplish far more than most adults realize. Adults are just children who forgot how to be free. Now I'm blabbing.

We are mostly not aware nor strong nor confident enough to ward off adults, when we're young. We just accept what they say. When treated respectfully, AND given attention by intelligent adults, children grow to be undamaged and brilliant.

It's easy stuff. Why are so many people screwed up. I think the answer to that is that people often have children as afterthoughts. Then they're a burden.

Well, I had to add more to this post after all. It's such an important subject.

[omega minimo]

7. Saw bumper sticker: "Remember What You Wanted To Be"

[windoe]

8. Thank you for sharing a wonderful post H2O man!

If we allow it, we are every age we have ever been, our true essence has been with us since the beginning, our vital force. I believe keeping our dreams alive is most important, since everything that manifests on this Earth was first a dream. The most important people to me who inspired me the most, like Martin Luther King, Gandhi, poets like Yeats, and musicians like John Lennon, and many writers of fiction and non fiction set examples of how how powerful and important it is to hold a clear vision of the future, no matter what the world looks like now.

As a teenager I was inspired by Anais Nin, the first writer whose writing awakened a sleeping aspect of my own inner voice, inspiring me to travel and keep writing, and shared my fascination with everyone I meet. I never stopped reading, there were many others, strong female actresses and rock singers, and explorers, so grateful to have them in this world.

May I add that what President Obama did for millions of people was to inspire them to dream of possibilities. Everyone has their own unique and important contribution to make to this world, and it is imperative not to allow any craziness or fear to kill our dreams, this is not easy but takes a strong intent. Because we can manifest our dreams positively or negatively. When we have the most despair, go see some art, or listen to music, and read the great poets, like Omar Khayyam, Rumi, and read or watch the great speeches made by great people like Malcolm X, to revive this vital force, our inner fire.

Good Journeys, Windoe