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Edited on Wed Aug-18-10 01:24 PM by MrScorpio
I've decided to erect a scale of stupidity to identify stupid people based on their political activity.
As always, this is completely non-scientific and utterly arbitrary.
Enjoy.
So far, I've identified four types of stupid people political activities and here they are:
The lowest level of stupid person consists of a someone that I'd like to call "The Doofus". Your standard Doofus is pretty harmless and is very much non-political. If a Doofus even bothered to vote, it'd be a major scandal in Doofus circles. Most of the time, whenever this happens, it's because a Doofus was so drunk that he mistook a polling place for a titty bar. And while in a drunken stupor he pushes buttons and flips levers and before you know it, he get's an "I voted" sticker slapped upside his forehead. Doofuses are always good for a laugh, great people to hang out with when you're in need of some booze and broads. And, most of all, a Doofus doesn't have a mean bone in his body.
Most of the time, you never have to worry about the political activities of Doofuses. They don't want or have any.
The next highest level is made up of "The God-Damned Idiots". I'm sure that you remember that rant that I posted earlier in the week. These people are almost like your Doofus, except that they feel an overwhelming need to delve into the miasma that is politics. And when they do, they quickly find themselves in way over their pointy heads. The problem with God-Damned Idiots is that they're always ill-informed or uninformed... And are always too stubborn and obtuse to realize that they need to change their ways. You'll usually find your standard God-Damned idiot holding a misspelled sign in a three person protest, or calling in on the Republican C-Span telephone line to complain about how badly Obama is leading America into Nazi Germany. God-Damned Idiots do vote. But they always vote AGAINST their best interests, because they're either mean spirited or too stupid to know better, or both. Don't discount greedy as well.
Your basic God-Damned Idiot is almost always a Teabagger.
At the third highest level we have "The Shit For Brains Dumbass". Shit For Brains Dumbasses are separate from the Doofuses and God-Damned Idiots in that they're so completely paranoid that being armed and dangerous is a necessity for them. These people think that Alex Jones and Glenn Beck and perfectly rational sources of information. They think that they need to act right away and use their guns against an oppressive US Government before their guns are taken away from their cold, dead fingers. Which is usually how their guns are taken from them eventually. Shit For Brains Dumbasses are quick to fear and anger and very slow to reason. Shit For Brains Dumbasses think that shooting something of someone is the best way to address their own paranoia issues.
We usually hear about these el stupidos whenever they're conducting wild shooting sprees, where they almost always end up dead with fifty million bullets in their asses.
The fourth and final level is made up of "The Fucking Morons". These are the most dangerous of them all... For they are the public office holders. Either elected or appointed, these incompetent brain donors have the ability to harm everything and everyone in their path due to fact that they can enact fucking moronic laws and regulations. Fucking Morons are great for advancing the Doomsday Clock a few ticks forward now and again. The nature of American laws is that they're supposed to cover the lowest common denominator, so their stupidity can affect us all. Illegal wars, tax breaks for the rich, bad economic policies and kicking poor people in the balls are just some their handiwork. They have the benefit of money and power backing their elections, and once in office, they have access to all of OUR money. The Fucking Morons love both the God-Damned Idiots and Shit For Brains Dumbasses alike... It's their base, baby. Once they're in office, it takes a shitload of effort to get them out.
Fucking Morons are not in officer for long, unless of course, their representing a place that's made up of mostly Doofuses, God-Damned Idiots and Shit For Brains Dumbasses who vote for them. If they don't last long, you can find them twirling up a storm on Dancing With The Stars.
There you have it, the four levels of political stupidity.
I'd like to dedicate this OP the the hard work of the great Fucking Moron, Rep. Louie Gohmert of Texas. He's an inspiration for stupid people far and wide.
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