Stop Making Delicious Food I Can't Stop Eating And Go Back To Mexico

[n2doc]

BY JAMES WHITTINGTON
AUGUST 24, 2010 | ISSUE 46•34

This isn't the country I grew up in anymore. It used to be a place where hardworking Americans could make an honest living, support their families, and feel safe walking the streets. It used to be a place that rewarded decency and fairness. But now, thanks to the millions of illegal immigrants crossing our borders every year, all that's changed—and I for one have had enough. So listen up, Mexicans: Stop cooking all that mouthwatering food that I cannot stop consuming and go home!

I am dead serious. We didn't invite you here, and it's high time you quit making all those rich, complex mole sauces that seem to fire every taste bud on my tongue and return to your native land. There's no room for you here.

Yes, your sauces satisfy the body as well as the soul. But does that excuse the throngs of day laborers waiting on the corner every morning for jobs that rightfully belong to someone born in the USA? Even if that heavenly sauce is drizzled over seared duck breast and is studded with ripe avocados?

No, sir. Not in my book.




http://www.theonion.com/articles/stop-making-delicious-food-i-cant-stop-eating-and,17951/

[TheMuse]

1. Mmmm....mole sauce

Mole Mole Mole

[LynneSin]

2. After you have authentic Mexican food cooked by a Mexican..

you can never ever go back to places like Taco Bell or other over processed Mexican restaurants.

I had the good fortune of attending several weddings/baby showers for a friend who was half-mexican. These were amazing celebrations where you'd have the formal sitdown dinner catered for everyone and then a 2nd meal later that day where all the relatives from Mexico would cook dinner for everyone. Amazing!

[wtmusic]

4. And many regional styles under the Mexican banner.

Here in Southern California there is some of the best ranchera style mex in the country, but subtle differences between that and tex-mex.

And southern Mexican food is a completely different animal - no burritos, tacos, etc., but off-the-hook seafood.

Is it time for lunch yet?

[pinboy3niner]

3. Excellente!

More from this column:

And good riddance to them all! Except for Pedro at work, of course. And the Velázquez family, who've invited me to their family barbecue three years running. Talk about some grilling going down! I guess I'd miss Maria from the coffee shop; she must have the sweetest smile I've ever seen. Oh, and Danny, who sometimes plays golf with us. Can't forget the Guzmáns. They're more friends of my wife, but Manuel is full of hilarious stories, plus they turned me onto pollo en pipián. Who would have thought that a sauce made from pumpkin seeds could be so sublime? Yeah, and Dr. Gilberto, my dentist. I'll miss him too. He's a good guy.

But the rest of you, the ones I don't know personally, I won't miss you at all.

[Scuba]

5. And quit tending our children too!!!

[leeroysphitz]

6. I would miss the tamales.

Ay, ay, ay, ay, canta y no llores
porque cantando se alegran
cielito lindo los corazones

[KansDem]

7. Ahhh, Mexican hot sauces are sooooo last decade. I want Asian hot sauce now!

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...:9

(okay, okay, I still like Mexican sauces, too!)

[get the red out]

8. Agree - EXCEPT

Please don't go home, I couldn't LIVE very long without good Mexican food, life would loose all meaning, Italian and Chinese just aren't enough.........

Edited to add: We discovered a kick-ass Mexican place (run by real Mexican people who knew how to cook) in the middle of my dying home town in eastern Kentucky this past spring, WONDERFUL FOOD. I made a point to tell the waiter that I was glad they had located there because the downtown needed new businesses and the food was soooo good!

[pansypoo53219]

9. lol. i think milwaukee, wi

has more mexican restaurants than german now.