If you'd like to see the phrase "...to anyone who may have taken offense..."

[blondeatlast]

(or words to that general effect) disappear from the English language, kindly respond in this thread.

Yes, I have an AGENDA here. See below.

Me? I'm trying to raise a responsible, empathetic son here--just stop it, leaders. Stop it from the first time it was uttered (I'm guessing by Frank Luntz). :banghead:

[blondeatlast]

1. Edit: self-delete. nt

[Catherina]

2. "...to anyone who may have taken offense..."

is such a reptilian way of telling people to kiss your ass. Rec'd

[damntexdem]

3. No, I'd rather see them enshrined in the ...

Repuke Idiocy Hall of Fame. ;-)

[myrna minx]

4. K&R. It's insulting. n/t

[Cerridwen]

5. "I'm sorry IF YOU took offense." Oh yeah.

The non-apology apology combined with the conditional IF to subtly blame the victim.

"Mistakes were made."

"I'm sorry I hit you and busted your jaw BUT YOU made me so mad!"

Non-apology apologies on a spectrum of non-apologies.

Oh, what the hell, I'll post what I was thinking just before I read your OP.

What she said:

In a recent interview I was asked about the recent tragedies about gay youth who have committed suicide, and I misspoke when I referred to someone's sexual identity as a "lifestyle choice." I meant no disrespect to the LGBT community, and I apologize to any who have taken offense at my poor choice of words. Sexual orientation and gender identity are not a choice, and anyone who knows me and my work over the years knows that I am a firm believer and supporter in the rights of LGBT Americans. Most of all, I hope this does not distract from the issue I was asked about -- the desperate, tragic decision by some young people who feel that their only recourse is to take their own lives because they are being bullied or harassed because they are gay, or because others believe they are gay. We must instill in young people respect for one another, and we must set an example of mutual regard and civility to create an environment that is safe for every person, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

What she could have said:

I am sorry I used insensitive words to refer to LGBTIQ people.

In a recent interview I was asked about the recent tragedies about gay youth who have committed suicide and I used the insensitive phrase, "lifestyle choice." I am sorry.

I meant no disrespect to the LGBTIQ community, and I am sorry for using a phrase frequently used to frame sexual orientation and gender identity as a choice. It is a hurtful and dangerous phrase. Sexual orientation and gender identity are not a choice, nor sin, nor psychological illness, nor something of which to be ashamed.

Most of all, I hope to use this as an opportunity to discuss the ways in which such words are used to bully or harass those who are gay or even perceived as gay and why that might lead to the desperate, tragic decision by some young people who feel that their only recourse is to take their own lives.

We must instill in young people respect for one another, and we must set the example ourselves, of mutual regard and civility to create an environment that is safe for every person, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

Excuse me, I have to go find some pearls to clutch. *sigh*

[QC]

6. Kick!

[G_j]

7. K&R

[TexasObserver]

8. Damn right. An apology is "I'm sorry I (did whatever)."

It is not "I'm sorry if you took offense."

THAT is not an apology, it's an attempt to shift responsibility.

[xchrom]

9. recommend -- and we're getting lots of you don't understand -- you don't get the context -- etc.

what i understand is this -- she didn't 'misspeak' and that was no 'apology'.

[Rhythm]

10. Kickin' it and rec'in it...

Anyone who uses that phrase needs a good swift kick in the teeth.

[superduperfarleft]

11. I wish all the homophobes and other clueless straights on DU

would do us all a favor and die in a fire.

Sorry if I offended anyone...

[blondeatlast]

12. k for the afternoon/evening crowd. nt

[rucky]

13. At least "sorry I got caught" would be honest for 'em.

[terrya]

14. Yep

[Iggo]

15. Can we get rid of 'misspoke', too?

And replace it with "Man, I fucked up royally. I am sooooo sorry."

[blondeatlast]

Absolutely. nt

[blondeatlast]

17. Absolutely. nt

[Uncle Joe]

16. It's a passive aggressive phrase, and I agree with you, there is no apology to it.

Thanks for the thread, blondeatlast.

[CrownPrinceBandar]

18. They are "weasel words"......

and is just classic psychological projection of the speaker wishing to deflect responsibility from themselves.