Confession - My mom was a welfare queen

[Anser]

Actually, I knew a lot of welfare queens growing up. And not only did they "play the system" but they had a diabolical liberal agenda!

They would flaunt the wealth they had mugged from the american taxpayer.

Whether it was pooling together cash to afford gas money for a joint trip to the supermarket (Sharing resources! Carpooling! Clearly they were commie environmentalists!)

Or, babysitting for each other while others were out job searching, or writing a term paper (In those especially insane days before Clinton era Welfare reform, when poor people were actually allowed to go to college, can you imagine?)

We, of course, had a big screen television. (My mom had this friend with a pickup truck, and on large item garbage day they'd go out there and commit more looney left environmentalism. Reuse recycle...pfft!)

She even swindled the government out of money for a computer while she went to school. (The computer I grew up tinkering with, which had the effect of helping me develop the technical skills I've used to claw my own way out of poverty. Which led to, you guessed it, more liberal propaganda being spewed, at rallies and on blogs, by me!)


/Tongue in cheek off
/Sarcasm off

It's been 5 years since she passed. RIP mom, life dealt you the rawest and roughest of hands, yet you still somehow took care of everyone around you.

[w8liftinglady]

1. i was a welfare queen,too.Your mom was in good company.

I used every government program offered for prenatal care,food stamps,college,child assistance...while I went to college to become a nurse.I think I've "paid it back"...A hug to you from a mom.

[Anser]

7. Thank you..

Thank you for the hug. :hug:

Its good to hear from another successful "queen"! :)

My mom went to school to be a social worker, and before her health failed her she had the chance to give back as well. Though I used to joke with her that shw was just getting paid for doing what she'd always done. :)

[Myrina]

52. Me too ...

... and I have to admit, I *did* bend the rules. The daycare in the neighborhood *we* lived in was in a converted old church. It was smelly, the toys and furnishings looked 2nd or 3rd hand, and many of the kids were in protective custody & had all kinds of social,educational or medical (contagious) issues.

One summer I had a temp job working at a pretty prestigious company that co-sponsored a daycare nearby so its employees could get discounted rates. This daycare was brand new, had a lovely play-yard, the kids got field trips and computer lessons, swim lessons and other perks. I helped myself to a few sheets of letterhead from the mail room and forged a letter saying I was a new employee and therefore my daughter qualified to attend the neighboring daycare. I listed my 'salary' so it would correspond to a daycare rate I could afford as a temp worker - so I didn't take full advantage. But I knew I had to get her out of that craphole she was in.

15 years later, she's played in the youth symphony for 4 years, took all College Prep classes in high school, and is majoring in Film.

And I sorta forgot to report part of my meagre inheritance from my dad's passing. Instead, I put that money in my daughter's name in a college fund which will mature next year, and fully pay for her to spend a semester in England. SHAME ON ME.

I think it's absolutely horrible in this country that children are automatically penalized (or, conversely given an advantage) because of their parents' income. What ever happened to 'equal opportunity'???

[Anser]

54. Great to hear..

I'm sure there were many little things my mom did as well to try to give me a leg up, that I didn't even know were going on. I do remember the hours of sitting in the "welfare office" as a kid when she couldn't find a babysitter and had to go be "held accountable."

It is great to hear that your daughter is striving, due in no small part to your doing everything you could to give her some semblance of the opportunity our "meritocracy" supposedly provides everyone with automatically. Truth is it takes a lot of hard work, and even then, circumstances outside your control can crop up. We were always one car breakdown, or one especially nasty illness away from disaster.

I salute you Myrina :)

[Myrina]

56. Thanks :-) and kudos to your mom, as well ..

... alot of times we have to make 'deals with the devil' when we're in that financial bottom % but I truly believe that most moms make the choice based on what's going to help their children the most.

I know I sure as hell didn't eat steak or bon bons, nor did I spend time on the sofa watching Soap Operas or driving a Cadillac, as the right wing likes to stereotype 'welfare moms'. More like I put myself thru college, worked full time whenever I could, did internships AND volunteer work in addition, drove a crappy old Honda and ate ALOT of tuna casserole, and read to my daughter every night before I tucked her into bed.

[JuniperLea]

2. RIP Anser's Mom...

You done good!

Thanks for the great OP. I laughed, I cried, I got angry, I got happy... that's what I call a great OP!

:toast:

[Name removed]

3. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Anser]

22. Thank you

For your kind words.

If it makes you feel any better, the republicans had already run over many of them with their hummers before any buses got involved ;)

[Brickbat]

4. Well done.

You and your work are a testament to her strength. Thank you for sharing!

[arbusto_baboso]

5. I work as an "enabler" to Welfare Queens.

And I have to say, that most moms who get cash assistance from the government are like your mom, may she rest in peace.

Sure, there is some fraud, but it is low level in dollar amounts, and NO ONE is getting wealthy from it, or living high-off-the-hog. People are just trying to survive. The more desperate they get, the more desperate their actions can become. It's sad how few Americans realize that.

[Anser]

12. Codependency

Codependency isn't too far off from cooperation.

Thank you for your "enabling" efforts ;)

[elias7]

33. Do you actually work for social services? If, so...

I'd be curious to know if you have any statistical data that can be put out there to refute the welfare queen narrative.

I was once in quite an argument with a trustafarian who felt most getting welfare abused the system. I was in the one bad apple camp, feeling that until I had facts showing me that a preponderance of this group cheated the system, I would operate under the assumption that a few, well publicized cases skew the public perception.

Are there such data out there? The "welfare queen" myth needs to be slammed, and facts seem a good start.

[jeff47]

41. Well, there's one easy one

Point out one to me. Just one Cadillac-driving welfare queen living high on the hog.

"I would operate under the assumption that a few, well publicized cases skew the public perception."

The problem is there haven't been any publicized cases. Public perception was skewed via marketing, not by holding up anyone as an example.

If you'd like a stat, 80% of welfare recipients have a full-time job.

[elias7]

49. Yes, that's what I'm looking for

Statistics, as I've not run across them. What's your resource for the employment figures, and do you have other resources that I might dig into?

[madmax]

6. My Mom, too

Similar. Thank you, Mom. I miss you and love you so much.

[Anser]

18. A lot of strong women out there

It's good to hear about them, thanks for reading and sharing.

[bobbolink]

29. this is a brilliant thread! I think this could be the basis for not only a needed website, but a

book.

Really, these are the stories which need to be told!

Thank you so much for starting this! :yourock:

[ScreamingMeemie]

8. This is a beautiful post.

Thank you for sharing your mom with us Anser.

[spooky3]

9. I thought you were going to tell us she was a CEO

of any major corporation.

Seriously, I am sorry you lost such a remarkable mom.

:hug:

[Anser]

14. Heh, I like it

Yeah, as a corporate welfare recipient she'd have actually been getting a non-negligible chunk of tax payer money.

Thank you for the sentiments and the :hug:

[lapislzi]

10. My mom, too

She stole medical care from the hardworking taxpayers of New York State. She lay on one of the state's gurneys in a hallway for three days before one of the taxpayers' doctors could see her and diagnose her stage 4 cancer.

And don't even get me started on my father! He stole unemployment checks from the state for 26 weeks! But he was caught and couldn't take any more money from the state, even though it was another 26 weeks before he found work.

Even little me, at fourteen years of age, was well trained in the ways of welfare. I was issued those socialist food stamps by my parents and walked to the supermarket (clearly a tree-hugger in training) to buy bread and eggs on the state's dime. I tried stealing tampons because I didn't know any better, but the store manager straightened me out by yelling at me on the checkout line, "you can't pay for Tampax with food stamps!" I got my comeuppance.

Of course, I was able to game the system again in college. I graduated to federal money! I was in the big leagues. The stupid government even guaranteed my loans! I paid every dime back to those dumbasses. A little quid pro quo.

If only we poor had stayed invisible, as nature intended.

[Anser]

16. Good to hear

The poor make a great scapegoat, as long as they remain silent and invisible.

Ah, trips to the grocery store with foodstamps. I remember them well. Some kids had their video games, I had my two favorite games "How many meals can I buy with this many food stamps" and "How many coupons will the cashier let me get away with using at once" What can I say, I was a bit of a math geek ;)

So, what sort of degree did you get on the government's (borrowed) dime. I'm still paying back my federal loans for my currently unused law degree.

I'm sorry to hear about your parents rough times :( My mom also had her run in's with shoddy government (under) funded medical care. Its actually the reason she's no longer with us. But thats another, longer, much more depressing story.

[lapislzi]

20. thanks for sharing your story, Anser

I'm sure you miss your mom the way I do mine.

I got my BA in Art History in 3 years and my MA (same discipline) in 6 months. And, as crazy as it seems, I do use it! If nothing else, college teaches you how to learn, and, hopefully, how to write.

:hug:

[bobbolink]

30. I *love* it! Your story is well-written, and deserves wider reading!

:yourock:

Thank you for speaking up!

[Tatiana]

11. RIP.

Clearly your mom was outstanding as she raised someone as caring and determined as you!

:hug:

[Anser]

17. Aww..

Thank you Tatiana, I try to live up the the standards of character she set. :hug:

[asdjrocky]

13. She sure sounds like she was a queen.

Good post.

[Erose999]

15. My parents gamed the system and gave me those little green tickets to take to school so I could scam

free breakfasts and lunches off the gubbermint. The ones they couldn't afford to provide for me, even if they'd had time with their working 2 jobs.

Then there was this one time when my deadbeat uncle went to prison and we adopted my cousin as a foster child. That whopping check from the state every month was almost enough to pay for her food and diapers and the expenses related to her medical care.

Then, because I fooled them into thinking that I had worked hard enough, I got the state and the federal gov't to pay for my education. I almost got enough money to cover tuition, books, and expenses. Of course, I had to get a job to cover the rest, but I scammed that off the state too!

At one point, due to my laziness of only being able to work half-time at my minumum wage job while going to school full-time, I had to go on food stamps. If you can believe it, the state actually requires college students to WORK before they get food stamps. The nerve... and then they made me provide a whole bunch of detailed information about my financial aid and all that other stuff. They ALMOST caught me with all that paperwork and red tape....

And now my parents are getting free government healthcare. All they had to do was fight the government for the past 15 years to prove to them that mom's dying of a terminal disease, and that Dad has 80% hearing loss, and a skin condition from Agent Orange. Now the gov't is making it rain for them... they can have steak once a month... if its on sale.

[Anser]

19. Wow Erose, this sounds familiar

Thank you for sharing your story.

I tried to get government assistance while in college as well. Luckily my mom got her degree before the "Welfare Reform" rules were put into place which basically said that if you wanted food stamps or cash assistance, you had to be working full time, and college didn't count.

I was turned down, and instead had to work as many as 3 jobs while trying to get my degree to mkae ends meet. Of course Bush would just appluad me as "uniquely american" http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/blbushism-uniquelyamerican.htm
Nevermind the ulcer I developed during this time, heh.

My mom had her own battles with medicaid and disability covereage as well. A big part of why she's no logner around, but as I've mentioned, thats another (depressing) story that is kind of hard on me to try to tell.

[Erose999]

21. Yeah, they say these struggles make us "uniquely American" and that they "build character" but the

caveat is that its only if you think like them. They are all about the "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" narrative. But when you start trying to help others out too, and when you start asking why people have to suffer... thats when you get a label like "pinko" or "commie" lol.

[Dappleganger]

23. My grandmother was a welfare queen, too.

She also worked her ass off to put food on the table and buy school books for her kids.

I am proud to come from those kind of roots. :)

[Anser]

45. good to hear

I'm proud of my roots as well. It's funny, I thought it was kind of a no brainer to be proud of such hard working people as your grandmother and my mom. Yet, when I went to law school, when anyone heard that I grew up poor they acted like it was something I should be ashamed of. Of course it was a private law school in the south, soo...

[Dappleganger]

47. My mother was quite ashamed growing up...

but as she grew older she became proud of it. They lived on the wrong side of the RR tracks with the "poor coloureds", as she used to say.

You're right, people have a tendency to look down on the poor and working class, even more so on welfare families.

[GreenPartyVoter]

24. Thanks for sharing this. *hugs*. Would you be interested in

cross-posting it to the Poverty Forum?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topics&forum=230

[Anser]

32. Sure..

And thanks for the link. How do I cross-post, does that just mean to repost it in that forum?

also, thanks for the :hug: :)

[GreenPartyVoter]

36. Yes, just post it in there. If you have any problems, then I would be happy to do it for you. :^)

[Anser]

40. Done

Didn't realize about cross posting.

I'm sad to say that due to being so busy most days I don't make it much further than the greatest page very often.

[GreenPartyVoter]

42. I know what you mean. I usually stay in GD and the Lounge, but every few days I try

to visit some of my smaller forums as well. :)

[Dappleganger]

43. delete

[TBF]

25. K&R nt

[madmax]

26. k&r for this weeks most awesome post

Been doing some work around the house and thinking of your post, your Mom, all our Moms.

It's good to remember these beautiful, strong, women on an ordinary day - not just one day reserved in May.

Thank you Anser. :hug: I talk to my Mom everyday but, more so today. I know her spirit hears me and I know what her replies are and I hear her laugh.

A most wonderful feel good day.

[Anser]

37. Aww.. thank you

We're thnking about our late great mom's together today. Thank you for your sentiments, they mean a lot.

:hug:

[EFerrari]

27. Cheers for your mom. My mom was a Welfare Queen for a few years, too.

I tell you, these women are dangerous. My mom went to college, too, and she organized the first seniors' group for Latino seniors in Santa Clara County. And you know what happens when those people get together. The next thing you know, kids have mentors and there's a recycling progam and were celebrating funny holidays with foreign words in them.

To our moms. :toast:

[Anser]

35. Love it

Glad to hear about another one :)

[damntexdem]

28. So, you're descending from royalty?

;-)

[Anser]

31. To everyone above I didn't already directly respond to

Thank you all so much for this outpouring of support.

Even though its been a few years now, I still miss her very much. I was 25 when she went, and still in college. I'd always wanted to "make it big" while she was still alive so I could give her the comfort she deserved, but there wasn't enough time. When I really think about the way she lived her life though, always putting others first, she would just be happy that I'm doing well, along with the countless others that she helped throughout her life.

[Scurrilous]

34. K & R

:thumbsup:

[laughingliberal]

38. K & R nt

[PA Democrat]

39. What a great tribute to your mom.

She must have been very proud of you.

:yourock:

[Scruffy1]

44. This is the best post of the week

Of course the real welfare queens like Bachmann, whose only source of income her whole life has been the taxpayers, don't want you to starve.

[RealisticDem44]

46. Great post

My condolences.

[Pacifist Patriot]

48. Wish I could recommend this one again.

[nofurylike]

50. K&R this is powerful, and beautifully written, Anser! thank you!! nt

[Anser]

51. A bit of a...

shameless self kick. But also, I didn't want any of the later posters I'd not directly responded to to feel left out ;)

Thanks for the K&R's, and other good sentiments. It was a bit of a rough day for me yesterday, and the positive response to my post definately cheered me up :)

[DirkGently]

53. "Welfare queen" has got to be near the top of Conservative doublethink terms

They've successfully villianized just about every conceivable good idea, profession, or endeavor. How could "welfare" become a dirty word? Or "teacher" a reviled profession? "Bleeding heart?" Now they're working on making "empathy" synonymous with "traitorous." Jesus would be so proud.

Mom sounds like a an exceptional woman.

Great post.

[Anser]

55. Their success has been frightening

Law school was a real eye opener for me. Going to a southern, private, top tier law school put me in a very "interesting" crowd of people. Many of the things I'd taken for granted as being pretty much morally settled issues turned out not to be.

I heard things like the need to bring back debtors prison (mostly in the context of people "refusing" to pay their medical bills)

And.. Let's see.. the need to sterilize the poor.

How school's should be re-segregated, since its "better and more fair for the blacks to compete with their own"

I wasn't the only liberal at my school, but I was definately among the most vocal. Our little chapter of the CLU did what it could. I spoke out in class when some of the disturbing gems and their like were brought up. Due to the absurdity of their positions, I fared pretty well in any debates that ensued. But..

Who knows, it seems they get the last laugh, last I checked a lot of the people who said those things went to work at their family's firm, and some have political aspirations. Meanwhile, I'm not sure its worth the expense of taking the bar exam, considering all the legal hiring freezes.

Heh, sorry, that turned into a bit of a rant. Thanks for your input and interest in my OP :)

[DirkGently]

58. Nadine Strossen offered to meet with interested students once before speaking to the undergrads.

I think I counted six or seven people there.

[Anser]

59. Wow...

That's just sad.

[DirkGently]

60. ... and that was when she the sitting ACLU president. Frickin' Florida. 8) nt

[Anser]

57. woo..

One vote from my first 5 star post.

Sorry, I know its silly. :blush:

Thanks for all the Recs ;)